No1here
Regular Member
- Aug 17, 2009
- 208
- 103
I've given money to homeless and even a girl at a gas station who said she didn't have enough for gas. Her car was at one of the pumps so I gave her $20.
I felt good about it and then I started wondering if I had just gotten scammed. My good feeling went away and I started to become angry.
I gave my mom a call and told her the story as it was really eating at me. She gave me some advice that is not only spot on but something that brought back the good feeling I initially had.
"It doesn't matter whether you were "scammed" or not. It doesn't matter if a homeless person goes and buys food or drugs with the money you give."
"What matters is that every single one of us need something, whether it's bread to fill our stomachs or even drugs to dull the pain. The fact is that no matter what they use that money for they certainly (in the case of the girl at the gas station) made an effort and worked to get it."
"That girl at the gas station may have scammed you, then again she may have been completely honest."
"Think about it this way. Had she approached someone other than you she may have been grabbed, dragged into an alley, raped and killed and that's regardless of whether she was scamming or not."
(BTW, the girl was maybe 5'1" and 90 pounds in full coat and sweaters.)
"Either give from the heart because you want to and it makes you feel good to believe in the better aspects of human nature and go on with your life."
"If you're going to second guess yourself each time then don't give. It's not for you to decide what someone needs the money for, whatever it is, the fact remains that they need the money for something. Whatever that need is should not concern you, you give because you want to help and not to feel high and mighty and decide what another person should or shouldn't do or need. Otherwise it wouldn't be a selfless act of kindness."
Sorry for the long post, just something I never forgot and never will. If that makes me a sucker then so be it.
I felt good about it and then I started wondering if I had just gotten scammed. My good feeling went away and I started to become angry.
I gave my mom a call and told her the story as it was really eating at me. She gave me some advice that is not only spot on but something that brought back the good feeling I initially had.
"It doesn't matter whether you were "scammed" or not. It doesn't matter if a homeless person goes and buys food or drugs with the money you give."
"What matters is that every single one of us need something, whether it's bread to fill our stomachs or even drugs to dull the pain. The fact is that no matter what they use that money for they certainly (in the case of the girl at the gas station) made an effort and worked to get it."
"That girl at the gas station may have scammed you, then again she may have been completely honest."
"Think about it this way. Had she approached someone other than you she may have been grabbed, dragged into an alley, raped and killed and that's regardless of whether she was scamming or not."
(BTW, the girl was maybe 5'1" and 90 pounds in full coat and sweaters.)
"Either give from the heart because you want to and it makes you feel good to believe in the better aspects of human nature and go on with your life."
"If you're going to second guess yourself each time then don't give. It's not for you to decide what someone needs the money for, whatever it is, the fact remains that they need the money for something. Whatever that need is should not concern you, you give because you want to help and not to feel high and mighty and decide what another person should or shouldn't do or need. Otherwise it wouldn't be a selfless act of kindness."
Sorry for the long post, just something I never forgot and never will. If that makes me a sucker then so be it.
