How to become an extrovert from being an introvert?

[destinywakes]

Regardless of your believes, there is no God listening to your prayers. You should work hard to make your life better.

The harder you work, the luckier you get and you feel blessed.

I would suggest you to join the local gym and be a regular. Or join a sports club. It will not only improve your health, but will also give you an opportunity to meet new people and socialize.

Due to this covid virus not able to go outside, I will try in future, thanks for your advice.

I'm an introvert too and I love being one, I read on this forum more than I talk tbh. But since I am a graphic artist / marketer, I had to get out of my comfort zone. Which means talking a bit more and trying new things.

If you read this forum a lot, then you know IM forces you to learn and adapt to new things.

Maybe build up confidence by doing videos of yourself just talking? Expressing whatever's on your mind. I was doing this thing on Instagram called Random Talking Video. It actually worked. I'm still an introvert but I can engage and talk to people without shying away or being awkward.

Good luck!

Thanks mate I will try that.

You don’t need to become an extrovert, but you do need to stand your ground and let people know when you feel disrespected or joked about. I’m an introvert myself, although I don’t take shit from from people nor care about what most people think about me. You mentioned that you stay calm and silent when being joked about, if it annoys you, you have to stand your ground and tell them how things are. Surround yourself with the right people and cut off the pessimists. Keep pushing my man, better times are ahead as long as you believe in yourself.

Yeah, I will do that thanks for your boost.

Its not your fault dude. Our society isn't really that advanced to fully understand others. Just dont care about them. Even if they just make fun of you, just ignore. They are just too stupid to care about others feeling. Find a new job and get interested in new things.

I'm trying hard to make things work, I know getting busy ourselves is the best remedy for all situations.

Start travelling

I love traveling but due to corona I can't go now.

I am also introverted, accept who you are and enjoy your own talents, don't try to change your own essence

Thanks man. I love to be myself the way iam.

you are not the only one who cares about the opinions of others. spit on everything, the main thing is that you feel good

From now onwards I will, thanks btw.

And enjoy the perks, too.

What are the perks, if someone asks...

1) You do not have stupid friends. You do not have enemies that you call friends. You are very specific, and you know whom you are dealing with.
2) Because you did not spend your summer partying, you probably studied and did something productive and made a million by now.
3) You are an asset to your family, because you are closer to them than an extrovert will ever be (no offence meant ). Simply because you don't like to go out too much, and you prefer to bond with your family instead.
4) Your GF/BF would be 10000 times luckier than others, because you do not like to experiment. You are with her/him because you "really" love her/him.

and so on..


Please, people... Try to be whom you are. You are like this for a reason....

Thanks man, being an introvert is having our own world.

1. First problem is that you feel you have to change to be an extrovert
2. Because of this, you do not lead your life the way you want but the way you think the people around you want you to live will make you happy.
3. Introvert is great, people are assholes


Live the life you want and not the one that society seems fit for you. And if you are divorced and penny less...be happy there are no children involved and you are free as a bird...

Tip: find a introvert GF and be introvert together haha. Works great for me. Game together, chill together, play together, Netflix together, talk trash together. We both enjoy each other's company and kind of laugh at the people who chase society standards like drinking, party, getting kids, married bla bla bla.

Your post really made my day Lol..
The idea is cool to get a girl who is introvert. Thanks.

I know exactly what you mean. For many years I have been attempting to become "extroverted". It all comes down to not giving a fuck about what people think of you, once you are in that state, you become comfortable in social situations and then you finally start being more talkative, because in the end everyone has an opinion on something. All conversations, in the end, come down to giving your opinion/view on something/someone. Keep that in mind and stop giving a fuck.

Thanks Iam trying hard.

Meet new people and talk to them a lot. Try to attend some networking events near you after COVID 19. And travel a lot if you like travelling

I just want to roam like hell after covid goaway.

I'm an extrovert all my life, and I guess.. it's about not giving a fuck lol... yes trust me don't giev a fuck and see the magic

Okay. Mate.

Hey mate.

You seem like you're self-assessing and giving yourself negative labels you don't need to. Losing your good accountant job just means the opportunity to challenge yourself and find a new path for making money.

Being 35 isn't a bad age tag, there are loads of 55 year old ladies that would love to get a toy boy happening

Just joking, but being 35 isn't any worse than you let it be.. if you think 35 is bad, you'll act that way, then people will detect that. There are 50 year old guys who don't care about their age, just live life and have fun, and people detect their character, not their age.

If you have never done much exercise, going to the gym can be one of the best ways to rewire your brain as a guy to be more confident in social situations. You don't need to even go to a gym if you don't have much disposable income, just look up videos on "body weight exercises for men" and start doing a little every day. It's not about how your body looks, it's about how it releases endorphins in your brain and also makes your male hormones start working more.

When you get to 35 your testosterone, growth hormone etc has been dropping for about 5 years and testosterone isn't just about being physically "male", men with lower testosterone have a higher chance of depression, anxiety, and as a knock on effect, can make you more prone to suicidal thoughts and other negative thought patterns. Doing exercise boosts your psychological coping skills, it's the quickest way to help yourself - you'll feel much better after a couple of weeks of consistent exercise. If you can, do weights.. like bench press and dumbbells etc.. that kind of training is particularly good for your psychology and physiology.

Introversion isn't a bad thing either. A lot of people are introverted and happy, just meaning that you get recharged when you're on your own, and then use your energy when you're around people, instead of being recharged by being around people.

If it's making you unhappy though and you wish you were more outgoing, then it's like anything else, you have to practice over and over again. If you would like to connect with people in a better way, you can't go from where you are now to the life of the party in one step.. it takes time.

The real thing that needs to change is the truths that you have in your mind about yourself - ie. "I am not someone that socialises at a family party".. the only way this "truth" in your mind can change is if your mind sees you socialising over and over again, even if it doesn't go well to begin with. You have to not care about things going badly and accept that it will not go well a lot of times, but that eventually it will. You'll find that it will surprise you that after trying and trying, one time you will have a great social experience at a family party or elsewhere, and then your perception of yourself will start to change.

Like other people said though, if your nature is introverted, learn to accept and be ok with that, and then be selective about when you choose to interact with other people.

I even don't think being an introvert is bad but sometimes in my mind I feel like introverts dominated by extroverts.
I like the way iam, I don't wanna change my behavior for someone.

 

[200]

Don't change yourself. Embrace yourself.
If people around you don't like that. Find somewhere else to be around.
That simple.

 

[Deleted member 1333509]

Due to this covid virus not able to go outside, I will try in future, thanks for your advice.

Thanks mate I will try that.

Yeah, I will do that thanks for your boost.

I'm trying hard to make things work, I know getting busy ourselves is the best remedy for all situations.

I love traveling but due to corona I can't go now.

Thanks man. I love to be myself the way iam.

From now onwards I will, thanks btw.

Thanks man, being an introvert is having our own world.

Your post really made my day Lol..
The idea is cool to get a girl who is introvert. Thanks.

Thanks Iam trying hard.

I just want to roam like hell after covid goaway.

Okay. Mate.

I even don't think being an introvert is bad but sometimes in my mind I feel like introverts dominated by extroverts.
I like the way iam, I don't wanna change my behavior for someone.

All good mate, only gave the advice I did because you said when you're around people you feel broken in your heart. That's something worth changing for imo because it must feel bad and be difficult.

There's a difference between changing yourself for other people and changing yourself for yourself.

gl anyway

 

[firstnamelastname]

you dont "become" an extrovert
that's like asking how do I become a female from being a male
you just need to learn to be happy with who you are

 

[Don Kongo]

This might sound dumb compared to the inspirational/ motivational stuff people already wrote here, but I think I might have gone through something similar and here is what I did:

I never had the nerves to talk back to friends, family or my partner, to stand up for myself or others, why?
Because i though so little of myself that I was simply afraid of being alone because I would never be able to get close someone again.

I realized that this was a fear and the most rational thing you can do with fears is to face it, because it ain't going anywhere...

I took time alone, learned a skill, got creative with my money instead of using it on others to please them, I invested it in myself.
Before long I was fairy comfortable financially, I realized people and opportunities began to open up for me, not because the money, but rather success attracts success... well so does misery, and the people who were in my life before where miserable, just better at hiding it than I was thus taking it out on me and other willer victims.

Pro-tip; breath work and exercise... I'm dead serious. It's great to quiet that self-doubt in your mind because these practices don't let you think of anything else while doing them, thus making it easier to ignore inner voices and other haters later on... Your mind is a muscle that get more efficient over time.

 

[Ethan_Schwarz]

Trust me, as an introvert, you can't just become an extrovert. What you can do is to try and improve your social skills. That can be by yourself by getting our of your social comfort zone or can be trained as well. Regardless, it doesn't happen overnight. Use your own set of skills for your own advantages.

 

[Chaffrey]

Trust me, as an introvert, you can't just become an extrovert. What you can do is to try and improve your social skills. That can be by yourself by getting our of your social comfort zone or can be trained as well. Regardless, it doesn't happen overnight. Use your own set of skills for your own advantages.

Allow me to disagree.
It might be a semantic problem here but I do strongly disagree

I used to be introvert as fack for several reasons :
- My name is extremely rare and joke-worthy in french
- I have always been very tall (reached 2m [6'6"] at 16yo
- I was a brainy type of kid, always keen to learn and discuss rather than engage into sports or confrontation
- I have been raised as an only child in a place with very few young people which led me not to have "training" as many above mentionned it
- Plus a few other things not worth disclosing

This whole situation led me to feel bad about myself as I saw how different I was from the group, I could not socialize with my peers and we all know how mean can young kids be (pls tell me it's not only where I come from)
I had daily belly aches provocated by the stress of havingto go to school, to the point I would frequently not go after lengthy arguments and made up symptoms...

So I think I can say I was an introvert, only having good times with my mother and grand-parents, I felt rejected and like shit anytime I'd be with other kids or young people.
Only some adults (some) would manage to make me feel alright

In High-school, I found the worst possible way out of my situation...drugsIt allowed me to calm down and find a bridge to get closer to some fellow drug users
(Chiiiill, we're talking about pot here, I still think pot fucked 7 years of my life but thats another topic)

So I met these fellow drug users and at the same time I was obligated to spend most of my time with them in pension
I slowly gained confidence in myself (even tho I was destroying my ambition and studies due to my relation to pot)

At some point my best friend at this time, who was younger than me, extrovert, but a good person and able to see my funny side, scored with a girl
I had obviously never had a girlfriend andthsi was the electroshock, this dudehad confidence in me, I admired him for being extrovert and wanted to feel like him
Took me a huge amount of balls(and hesitation) but I told him "Hey, you know that Léa (a girl Ihad a crush on), I'm gonna kiss her and I'm gonna do that at the exact spot I saw you first kissing your girl" (this gives you a idea of the amount of confidence I had in this dude)

On day, I managed to get the girl (who I had the feeling liked me) on the exact same square meter as my dude's girlfriend first kiss and kissed her
I was prepared to get rejected and feel like a shit even more than usual but when I saw she enjoyed it, when I saw her face brighten, my whole life did

All the bullshit of self depreciation, lack of confidence etc... vanished and it felt like a cute little orgasm for a few days ahah

After that I realised that I had qualities, I was sometimes funny, I was not the dumbest, I had a huge PP and most of all, my years as an introvert kept my gentle and compassionate side intact.

7 years later I can tell I'm an extrovert, the most extrovert of my group of friends and I'm able toseparate "real friends" from the rest (reference to an previous message)
So I'm not sure about the method but that's how it happened for me.

For sure the pension thing helps a lot

I also recommend going to the gym, not only to get ripped (even tho that gives you a huge confidence boost) but also because it releases a shole set of chemicals (hormons etc...) in your body which just makes you happy and feeling good (anyone who already destroyed themselves at the gym knows what I'm talking about)


So yeah, It is possible, I'm extrovert and used to be introvert

_____________________________________________________________

I got real sad when I read the first message of this thread by OP, we're 10 years later so I guess you did not let your dark thoughts take the room and a lot of things might have changed
Nethertheless if you think I can help, I would love to,anybody feeling bad about themselves please DM me, you are so much worthy and I will do anything to prevent a life to be lost
You who reads this overly lengthy message and have suicidal thoughts, anywhere you are, I know you feel like shit and think nobody cares, it's wrong, I do and so many people do as well
If you feel like you are alone and no girl (or boy) will ever love you, you are wrong, plenty of humans feel somehow the same way and are looking at the exact same thing you are, a soulmate who thinks they are a bit weird too

It's not over, DM me and let's talk about it, your life can change in a few days, might seem impossible but actually is very true, please just PM, much love and keep it up <3

 

[proxygo]

easy just look some one in the eye and say

see what happens

 

[dodoboy]

m as tu r b4te a lot man , yu will forget everything

 

[Chaffrey]

I'm new here, look like I mixed up join date and post date
Still relevant

I realise I did not explain why I am now introvert, in a few words :

I naturally go talk to strangers to the point some of my friends find it weird
I tend to express my opinions when I feel its relevant
People see me as an extrovert and I never feel like I have to make any effortsfor that

So I guess that I'm extrovert now

 

[Chaffrey]

m as tu r b4te a lot man , yu will forget everything

Nah that sucks, it's instant gratification and actually does the opposite of what is needed

 

[sunnybay]

Why would you want to do that? Stay what you are! Ok, you may need to develop some of extrovert 'skills' but by all means stay what you are, no need to change.

 

[sabhan]

I just wish you get a child soon from second marriage or adopted or surrogacy. All these introvert extrovert thoughts will go away as soon as a little angel comes to your life.

Also earn more money because money gets you respect. Spend money on people and relatives when they need it and they would respect you, care for you. See money solves 80% of problems in life and rest 20%,you can reduce by spending money on those problems.

That is how this world works.

 

[sabhan]

@VSYNC has nailed it further for you. I 100% agree with what he said in following :

When you get to 35 your testosterone, growth hormone etc has been dropping for about 5 years and testosterone isn't just about being physically "male", men with lower testosterone have a higher chance of depression, anxiety, and as a knock on effect, can make you more prone to suicidal thoughts and other negative thought patterns. Doing exercise boosts your psychological coping skills, it's the quickest way to help yourself - you'll feel much better after a couple of weeks of consistent exercise. If you can, do weights.. like bench press and dumbbells etc.. that kind of training is particularly good for your psychology and physiology.

 

[Crewchief007]

destinywakes, here is some sage advice.

First and foremost, piggy banking off what others have stated, BE YOURSELF! As an Introvert, I will have you to know; you are in some GREAT company.

Look at this list of INTROVERTS and prove me wrong.

1. Michael Jordan
2. Warren Buffet
3. Bill Gates
4. Elon Musk
5. Kobe Bryant
6. Larry Bird
7. Mark Zuckerberg
8. Larry Page
9. Tiger Woods
10. Albert Einstein

Some of the most successful men in the world, are introverts who embraced who they are; if you want to move forward, stop trying to be an extrovert and be you!

You have a critical need for a mindset my Brother.

You can start by resetting your mindset in several areas, start with not giving any Fs.

Go grab a copy of, “The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: by Mark Manson”

Then, I suggest these reads, all by Jack Donovan.

1. The Way of Men
2. Becoming a Barbarian
3. A More Complete Beast

As you begin that journey, I promise, your mind, psyche, emotions will return to their ALPHA STATE. AND! You will find YOUR WAY!

Now, it is time to get personal…

I do not know you, or your ex-wife; that stated, this question drills down on a personal level.

Is it possible that your ex-wife practiced Hypergamy against you? Before you get back into dating, love, sex, relationships, and marriage, learn what HYPERGAMY is!

STOP what you’re doing and watch this video without ANY interruptions or distractions.

You did not mention “IF” you had any children with your ex-wife. If so, you need to make some strategic moves to ensure that your children DO NOT suffer any psychological, mental, or emotional harm. If you did not, disregard… and be thankful.

Next, if you are not, start taking care of your physical health. You need an exercise regime and a healthy diet regime. Men of great stature, men of high value take care of those two aspects of their being.

That’s a lot to digest, hope it helps!

P.S. In terms of that phase when you were suicidal, that is a normal emotion for men who do not understand today’s Hypergamous females.

I have another mind reset for you, grab a copy of, The Manipulated Man” by Esther Vilar.

Here me CLEARLY, do not, I mean, DO NOT ever let ANY female manipulate you, NOT EVER!

 

[Petta]

I need few advices from you guys whom I feel like my family members here you all how to be an extrovert n slap on those guys who make fun of me literally in front of everyone.

One or two times attack them by words. They will not do it again.

 

[Okaeri]

I don't even have friends. I have severe social anxiety to the point my muscles get stiff and start to hurt when I'm around other people and if I move too fast I start to tremble.
But if I don't talk or do shit people will walk all over me.I have no one to fight for me except myself so I guess I just force myself to be around people.

You have friends and you even managed to get married so... Not trying to make this a "who has it worse Olympics" just saying that you seem better of so if I can talk to other people I don't see why can't you.

 

[iCommunicate]

Hi mate, I registered specifically to comment on this thread because it’s similar to what I am going through although I’m pretty younger and I’m a great relationship, finances are good, relationships are good and I’ve got quite some hobbies but I still tend to over think when meeting new people.

What I’ve found is that it all boils down to your thoughts, try to exercise and meditate that way you can be able to relax and analyze your thoughts.

Exercise doesn’t have to be weight lifting alone,waking up and going for a run does wonders too.
And for meditation when you wake up in the morning, set a timer for 5 mins and close your eyes then focus on breathing in and out. After a week increase it to 10mins and so on. It might feel useless at first but with time you will see it’s effect. Try to work your way up to 30mins.

Pls send me a message if you need help or just post on this thread

I hope this post helps you in your journey to discover yourself.


——