I believe that in reality, we are all the same. The problem we face is that we -ALL- either consciously or subconsciously think what we are doing is bullshit. I am not speaking about BHW or making money online. I am talking about the need for money & work. Whether we acknowledge it or not, it doesn't make sense and seems contrary to our higher 'calling' for our being.
I was a christian at one point, then turned atheist, but in reality i just stopped giving a shit (agnostic).. That worked for a year or so but because I was a recovering oxycontin addict whenever I was pulled to one extreme and was let down (such as going to back to church) - it would set off a chain of events, usually leading me to use. I found that I was in no shape to go after god through the same ways as people at the church, simply because I completely disagreed with the culture/collective understanding of who jesus was and what exacty he was about.
I learned that being true to my self and being OK with my present lack of understanding was more important for growth than anything else. I think it is more important to be yourself instead of taking on what others thought.
That set off a chain of events. Life got exciting for a change. Simple things, like words that I felt people (including me) used on a daily basis, made absolutely no sense. Because I was interested in spiritual stuff, I did spend time on a lot of words.. I went to greek and latin to see the root breakdowns. I noticed immediately that there might be an issue with language (i am a conspiracy theorist, aka paranoid freak) and I felt that for the most people the language that we learn is very shallow, aka not indepth. Language is used to communicate our thoughts/emotions to other people. If all we can do to define the words we use is remember at best the dictionary description of it, and maybe a few parallel words, then does that constitute a real understanding? Sometimes answering questions is best approached from different angles.. such as "would we want someone to teach us something that they themselves only had a limited understanding of?" The answer should be no. We really do want and NEED the absolute best. If not then perhaps we cannot give ourselves fully to the instruction because we do see faults. Everyone does desire greatness.
When I started researching god, I started at the root.. I remember in watching the passion of the christ in theatres when it came out. I swear if Mel Gibson goes to hell then I want to go with him, because I believe he revealed a lot to people just through three movies: Braveheart, Passion of the Christ & Apocalypto. If you have any objections to Jesus I truly believe that it is with the not with the man but the people who say they follow him - so please just bear with me. Anyway, in the movie the passion of the christ there was a scene that was left out. It was the scene where the guys were coming to arrest jesus, and when they asked if he was jesus he said I AM. In the bible they all fell back (think of a small AoE shockwave with perhaps a 10ft radius). In the movie that did not happen. Anyway, I've kinda never let that go and started with the I AM stuff..
The oldest hebrew name for God is said to be lost - along with it's meaning. But lets just focus on what we do know. When god starts working with moses, god uses I AM That I AM. Just like we are. He just IS. He has no beginning nor ending that he knows of. Just like us. For all we know we've always existed, right?
Another one, and for me this is the version of god that I absolutely love... and it's found in ancient greek. Kurios.. I love Kurios because to me it means curiosity. Which means to examine, to find out.. to turn over.. to care. Curiosity needs no motivation, it is already motivating. Whatever we are curious in we usually keep going until we are no longer curious.
I don't care what anyone says. Most people join the church because they are afraid that if they don't say the magic words they will goto hell, and burn for all eternity. Honestly, for what I know I never asked to be born, and what I do know that this world was MAJORLY FUCKED UP before I ever entered the scene, and that most of "my problems" came from my father through osmosis and without my permission, so please - if you're a 'christian' and you tell me that free will is a choice of either A or B. Save it. Fuck the box that you aren't even aware of. You sheeple.
Your jesus was a fucking rebel. He practically told people they were god and that no matter what - you stand up for what you believe is right. That's the problem. People are afraid of death. This life is just a brief blip in time. What we do here DOES echo in eternity.
So stand up. Grab your balls and then headbutt a wall. Because You are the only thing you've ever known.
Look into Esoteric vs Exoteric. That's what jesus was all about. Change starts from within. Believe you are God.
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