Went to a bar alone tonight.

xShot said:
At the risk of my own dignity, I’ll transparently say I don’t have many friends these days.

I probably have 2-3 genuine friends - the rest have gone onto college or married. Most of my social circle has sort or deteriorated after high school. And I don’t think that’s abnormal - I’m not some sort of freak recluse, it’s just that most of my friends have done their own thing.

My girlfriend went on a family vacation this week, and I realized something… Most of my current friends are directly from her social circle. Makes me feel like a bit of a mooch.

Since she wasn’t around, I decided to go to a bar completely alone.

Might not sound like much, but I read in a book before that the best skill a man can master is the ability to be content alone. This was probably 2-3 years ago - I’ve never mustered the courage to actually do it. It just petrified me for some reason.

Tonight I did it.

It was a fucking blast. Didn’t go in with any expectations - just wanted to prove to myself I could do it. I had a few shots beforehand, and ended up shooting the shit with some random dude about stocks, marketing, and the politics. Had a girl hit on me, but I quickly shut her down and kept conversating with a newly made friend.

I was worried I’d look like some kind of weirdo - but it was quite the opposite. I don’t even know why I’m posting this, but I highly recommend trying it.

It’s very fulfilling.
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Many years ago I used to do it. At the first impression, it may looks like a nightmare, but it's not. These "escapades" gave me some of the best memories, directly from the Old Town of Bucharest (search on Youtube to make an impression about how many people were there in a regular night - not talking about the weekends, or soccer events, etc :)) - ). So, yeah: Highly recommended this kind of experience.
 
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Sounds like I'm twice your age and in the same boat. My social circle is shrinking as people move on with their lives, it's natural and probably accelerated by the events of the last couple of years. Been thinking about doing the bar thing again too for that reason. Worked good in the past. Always been content alone but like having some good friends and people to watch a sports game with. I think I'll follow your lead and hit up a local bar this week. Cheers!

Thanks for swinging the ban hammer @BassTrackerBoats that guy was a total troll. His account looked to be 3 days old too.
 
This reminds me of the first time I went to a movie theatre alone and felt exactly the same way afterwards. I would usually go with friends and I really wanted to see this specific movie, but no one was available. I decided to just go for it and go alone. To this day I still remember the feeling of knowing I didn't need anyone to have a good time.
 
Glad to hear you enjoyed yourself & spontaneously talked to people! It's quite hard, I'm guessing for most people.

I remember going to a wedding a couple years ago, only knew the bride (the groom a bit). There was a young couple who literally pushed me come out of my shell. We danced, partied like we knew each other for ages etc. I still remember how good that felt.

Unlike you guys, sometimes I'm just more shy (let's put it that way), which stops me from enjoying life. My point with this experience is... We're not weird. Communication is an essential human need. We're not the only ones who'd like to feel good & make other people feel good. There's others out there. Plenty. And when the dots connect, it's bound to be magical.
 
xShot said:
I probably have 2-3 genuine friends
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I don´t know how old you are, but this is very normal, the older you get, the more selective you get with friends and chose to keep the good one´s only, family becomes more important then a mass of friends. But a couple of beers now and then in a bar is very nice to .. =)
 
100% Agree with you.

I've been there myself, in that exact situation and it works exactly as you said.
 
xShot said:
At the risk of my own dignity, I’ll transparently say I don’t have many friends these days.

I probably have 2-3 genuine friends - the rest have gone onto college or married. Most of my social circle has sort or deteriorated after high school. And I don’t think that’s abnormal - I’m not some sort of freak recluse, it’s just that most of my friends have done their own thing.

My girlfriend went on a family vacation this week, and I realized something… Most of my current friends are directly from her social circle. Makes me feel like a bit of a mooch.

Since she wasn’t around, I decided to go to a bar completely alone.

Might not sound like much, but I read in a book before that the best skill a man can master is the ability to be content alone. This was probably 2-3 years ago - I’ve never mustered the courage to actually do it. It just petrified me for some reason.

Tonight I did it.

It was a fucking blast. Didn’t go in with any expectations - just wanted to prove to myself I could do it. I had a few shots beforehand, and ended up shooting the shit with some random dude about stocks, marketing, and the politics. Had a girl hit on me, but I quickly shut her down and kept conversating with a newly made friend.

I was worried I’d look like some kind of weirdo - but it was quite the opposite. I don’t even know why I’m posting this, but I highly recommend trying it.

It’s very fulfilling.
Click to expand...
Nice one man, gonna try this some day
 
Never went a bar alone because I am a weed guy more than a alchol xD
 
Gogol said:
u r my kind of fucker for sure. :D


You are welcome to my house dear. I am sure you have seen the swimming pool video I shared earlier. Cum deer. Will have a pull side party.
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Ma man ;)
 
xShot said:
Lol, your full of shit bro. Not sure if you’ve never been in a relationship yourself or you’re just ignorant, but being able to grow independently is a key to making a relationship work. Try being a controlling prick and see how it works out for you.

I was invited on this trip, and have met her family but turned it down because most of my free time as it is is spent with my girlfriend, and I wanted to prove to myself I could make friends on my own.
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I agree when my wife wants to hangout with her family and I don’t have to go win win brother.

people need time apart and it’s not saying your not part of her family sometimes they just need alone time. It’s healthy
 
Awesome making your self go out, it’s a great choice and it does wonders for your mental health.
 
People should be able to have fun on their own sometimes, it's totally natural :)
 
BassTrackerBoats said:
My tolerance for abusing others is quite low and especially when they target a fellow staff member.

That person can feel free to to to Redddit and clown about but their presence is not something that BHW thinks is best for the community.
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I’ve always liked the way you handled things, you are your own man and get your point across but you think of other till they don’t deserve your reserved opinion.
 
Gogol said:
You are welcome to my house dear. I am sure you have seen the swimming pool video I shared earlier. Cum deer. Will have a pull side party.
Click to expand...
Where? What video? What did I miss?
 
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