1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Luis Suarez: Hero To Zero, Byte By Bite :)

Discussion in 'BlackHat Lounge' started by Clifton Allen Says, Jun 24, 2014.

  1. Clifton Allen Says

    Clifton Allen Says Junior Member

    Joined:
    Apr 15, 2014
    Messages:
    190
    Likes Received:
    250
    Home Page:
    [FONT=&amp]Uruguay's Luis Suarez was involved in another World Cup controversy as he appeared to bite Italy's Giorgio Chiellini during their Group D clash.[/FONT]

    As a tribute to this soccer genuis, here is my little collection of puns ......(puns Luis, not buns lol) for BHW to digest. Enjoy!!!

    [FONT=&amp]Luis Suarez obviously misunderstood what commentators meant when they said that Uruguay,
    is a one man team and that their attack looks a bit toothless without him. [/FONT]

    [FONT=&amp]Uruguay's formation at the match today was not a 4-4-2 but a 4-4 chew?[/FONT]

    [FONT=&amp]I'm amazed Liverpool hasn't been looking at Chiellini to solve their defensive problems. He looked pretty tasty at the back tonight :)
    AC Milan are favourites to land the Uruguayan as he's now had a taste of Italy.
    To be fair to Suarez, I can`t resist an Italian sub either.
    The infamous food critic Luis Suarez confirms Italians taste better than Serbians. [/FONT]

    [FONT=&amp]Many England supporters now wish that Roy's men were as hungry as Uruguay to win. It sounds like Suarez's brace against England should have been a muzzle. [/FONT]
    [FONT=&amp]I suppose Luis Suarez's motto is simply: "If you can't beat them, eat them".
    [/FONT]
    [FONT=&amp]He will be watching the rest of the world cup on his laptop, saving everything, because Luis Suarez's laptop has 1 Terrier Bite of hard drive.

    There is no truth in the rumour that Luis Suarez has been offered a part in the new Star Wars movie... playing the part of Chewbacka.
    [/FONT]
    [FONT=&amp]Uruguay are proud that Luis Suarez is fighting tooth and nail for his country. [/FONT]

    [FONT=&amp]Suarez showed a lot of enthusiasm at the game, a game he really sunk his teeth into. [/FONT]

    [FONT=&amp]Some people feel so sorry for Suarez, all he wants to do is bite people and be racist, but the English media give him a hard time, not at all in bad taste following their defeat?
    [/FONT]
    [FONT=&amp]The attacked Italian defender has not got off lightly either, since Chiellini's wife will be furious... he tries to explain, "It's not a love bite, I got bit at football"...[/FONT]
    [FONT=&amp]"Bullshit....I'm leaving you, you cheating bastard" she says.[/FONT]

    [FONT=&amp]Luis Suarez has bitten someone for the third time in his career which can only mean one thing.....His wife must be a f*cking shit cook!!!! [/FONT]

    By the way, please feel free to add your spin on this story ;)
    Thanks

    Latest news from FIFA HQ.............

    FIFA have had a hearing about Suarez bite incident and they have awarded it to Qatar.
     
    • Thanks Thanks x 9
    Last edited: Jun 24, 2014
  2. karupoiss

    karupoiss Elite Member

    Joined:
    May 16, 2012
    Messages:
    1,634
    Likes Received:
    515
    Gender:
    Male
    Location:
    Europe
    Home Page:
    Haha, nice ones :D

    Suarez chew his way into the next round :)
     
    • Thanks Thanks x 1
  3. psyclogic

    psyclogic Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jul 22, 2012
    Messages:
    248
    Likes Received:
    76
    I just read he sees it as normal reaction. "These things happen inside the penalty area," Suarez told Uruguay's Channel 10 radio station. "We were chest against shoulder. I also immediately suffered a blow to the eye."
    What kind of example is this jerk for young footballers. Disgusting...
     
    • Thanks Thanks x 1
  4. Clifton Allen Says

    Clifton Allen Says Junior Member

    Joined:
    Apr 15, 2014
    Messages:
    190
    Likes Received:
    250
    Home Page:
    I agree with you.

    and much as I love his soccer skills, this is entirely the wrong message to the next generation of footballing stars,
    hence he needs international ban.

    Besides, you only had to look at his reactions..
    a). immediately when going down (trying to appear as if he was the injured party)
    b). held his hand to his teeth/mouth ( oh that where he hit me)
    c). lack of overall jubilation at the end of the match (he knew he was in the wrong, and probably would not play again in this tournament).
     
  5. stharthjw6j

    stharthjw6j BANNED BANNED

    Joined:
    Dec 23, 2013
    Messages:
    588
    Likes Received:
    250
    I feel sorry for him, he's the biggest victim in all of this. Yes sirs, that's what I said.
     
    • Thanks Thanks x 1
  6. Gogol

    Gogol Elite Member

    Joined:
    Sep 10, 2010
    Messages:
    3,066
    Likes Received:
    2,872
    Gender:
    Male
    Let me just re-paste the new and trending meme here :D

    [​IMG]
     
    • Thanks Thanks x 2
  7. divok

    divok Senior Member

    Joined:
    Jul 21, 2010
    Messages:
    1,015
    Likes Received:
    634
    Location:
    http://twitter.com/divok
    That was probably and should be his last match of the cup .
     
    • Thanks Thanks x 1
  8. Heywood00d

    Heywood00d Junior Member

    Joined:
    Jan 23, 2014
    Messages:
    131
    Likes Received:
    129
    Occupation:
    Freelance Sperm Donor
    Location:
    In Front Of A Screen
    The world of professional footballers doesn't need players like him, If I bit a player playing Sunday league football then I very much doubt I'd be allowed to play in that league again.

    The shameful thing about this all is pundits, commentators, media publications and fans painting a picture of Luis Suarez being the victim. If they think he has some kind of underlying mental issue or behavioural problem then why hasn't it been identified by a club psychologist by now? Furthermore if he does have an underlying issue then should he really be on the pitch before it's been resolved?

    I also don't understand how Suarez has got away with blatant dive after blatant dive so far this world cup, in the game last night he went down feigning injury, recovered half a second later, berated the referee and then just jogged back upfront.

    75091e59-a673-4c57-b7d6-f633c63ced98.jpg
     
    • Thanks Thanks x 1
  9. proxygo

    proxygo Jr. VIP Jr. VIP Premium Member

    Joined:
    Nov 2, 2008
    Messages:
    10,295
    Likes Received:
    8,714
    apparently Luis Suarez requested after the match to speak
    to the Italy manager , but he didnt wanna rub shoulders with him
     
    • Thanks Thanks x 2
  10. jackl

    jackl Regular Member

    Joined:
    Apr 20, 2014
    Messages:
    218
    Likes Received:
    39
    I woulden't like to get a blowjob from him.
     
    • Thanks Thanks x 1
  11. nqlong1986

    nqlong1986 Newbie

    Joined:
    Jun 28, 2011
    Messages:
    40
    Likes Received:
    8
    Player like Suarez need ban for lifetime. Soccer doesn't allow player like this. I vote to ban him from soccer.
     
    • Thanks Thanks x 3
  12. srb888

    srb888 Elite Member

    Joined:
    Jul 30, 2008
    Messages:
    3,260
    Likes Received:
    5,067
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    WebzSurfer
    Location:
    Sun, Mon, Tue, WTF, Sat!!! :)
    A la Mike Tyson... a$$hole to the teeth.
     
    • Thanks Thanks x 1
  13. wisdomkid

    wisdomkid Jr. VIP Jr. VIP

    Joined:
    Jun 20, 2011
    Messages:
    2,593
    Likes Received:
    750
    Suarez is a good player. but apparently, he's a vampire.. The first of it's kind to display it to the world... Sadly, he has supporters.. Hope he's not infecting them with a virus or something un-curable..
     
    • Thanks Thanks x 1
  14. Heywood00d

    Heywood00d Junior Member

    Joined:
    Jan 23, 2014
    Messages:
    131
    Likes Received:
    129
    Occupation:
    Freelance Sperm Donor
    Location:
    In Front Of A Screen
    If I'm honest I can't think of a male professional footballer that I would want one off. ;)
     
    • Thanks Thanks x 2
  15. UrsuAke

    UrsuAke Power Member

    Joined:
    Sep 28, 2011
    Messages:
    700
    Likes Received:
    978
    Occupation:
    SEO Specialist.
    Location:
    Romania, land of choice
    Have you considered female professional footballers?
     
    • Thanks Thanks x 1
  16. Clifton Allen Says

    Clifton Allen Says Junior Member

    Joined:
    Apr 15, 2014
    Messages:
    190
    Likes Received:
    250
    Home Page:
    [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG] [​IMG]

    [​IMG]
    [​IMG] [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]

    Suarez makes his mark on the opposition.


    [​IMG]
    and just in case those images disturbed any you males...... here is something to smile about :)
    [​IMG]
     
    • Thanks Thanks x 4
  17. Heywood00d

    Heywood00d Junior Member

    Joined:
    Jan 23, 2014
    Messages:
    131
    Likes Received:
    129
    Occupation:
    Freelance Sperm Donor
    Location:
    In Front Of A Screen
    Absolutely; however, I'm not sure my ego could deal with a partner being better at football than me!

    I also took a great interest in the Lingerie World Cup earlier on this year, not sure if that counts as professional though.
     
    • Thanks Thanks x 1
  18. Aluminium

    Aluminium Jr. VIP Jr. VIP Premium Member

    Joined:
    Dec 5, 2013
    Messages:
    1,547
    Likes Received:
    875
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    High-Quality Content Provider
    Location:
    Canada
    Home Page:
    Looked like he just had his mouth open and hit the dude in the shoulder.

    I honestly can't believe that this is a big deal in the world of soccer (futbol), are you SERIOUS?

    I love watching soccer now because of this years world cup, it actually inspired me to get a pair of boots and go out to the field every now and then, but the flopping is ridiculous.

    If the dude was gashed open from a gnarly bite that was CLEARLY on purpose, I wouldn't mind the whole debacle. To me it just seems like it was a wrong place, wrong time sort of sitatuion.

    Suspending a dude for two years because he scratched a guy with his teeth is pretty crazy in my opinion.
     
    • Thanks Thanks x 2
    Last edited: Jun 25, 2014
  19. Heywood00d

    Heywood00d Junior Member

    Joined:
    Jan 23, 2014
    Messages:
    131
    Likes Received:
    129
    Occupation:
    Freelance Sperm Donor
    Location:
    In Front Of A Screen
    I don't know if you guys saw it but I found it distasteful of Gaston Ramirez to try and cover up the bite marks on Chiellini's shoulder, I understand that it's his team-mate but there's no need for him to get involved.
     
  20. t0mmy

    t0mmy Moderator Staff Member Moderator Jr. VIP

    Joined:
    Jun 5, 2011
    Messages:
    6,252
    Likes Received:
    12,483
    Location:
    Ireland
    Home Page:
    Someone should feed that man before matches! As a Liverpool supporter I'm quite worried now they will ban him at club level.
     
    • Thanks Thanks x 2