I have not wanted to say this, but it is time to look around open areas. meaning no people. where does he go - alone? (small group thing) (probably for reason- yes)
It may have come up in small group. the doctor can not tell you a thing, and that is for a reason. but the doctor can get info, and share it in ways you can not, but s/he needs to be told why they should.
again where is the cat. It might be found if the doc goes though notes, or to groups. groups change- the doc has info on this, and you will likely never see or know these things.
the cat can't talk, but the person that might have the cat can-- and will. they may be as confused as you (and still get it). with all you have said this needs to happen. the doc, who has his name on the meds might not know cr*p about this, but s/he will know the doc or group that does.
I really hope the best for both of you. this is sounding like something I already heard in small group some time ago. to be candid you are at a point that this needs to be done. you may find family can make this go smoother, but if you explain what you have said here- there are triggers that will start action. action that some don't take until they hear all of this. which is to say-- they (docs) hide behind laws, but there are other laws that force action.(USA).
you have not painted a good picture, and I know you know this. I would submit you may be at the point where to draw the line, if you put into action what I have said. While I already said I don't know where to draw the line, I have had to do i t myself. It really hurts. it feels bad. I hope you don't have to draw the line. more over I hope it hasn't gone stupid.
No matter what happens-- to forgive is the key. Not for them, but for you.