pewep
Power Member
- Nov 3, 2008
- 705
- 3,293
Hey guys, I just wanted to make a semi-quick update on how being 100% sober from alcohol is going.
To make a long story short - it healed my soul. I've been completely sober for 77 days, 16 hours and 56 minutes and 45 seconds (not that I'm counting) and this year I've only drank about 3 times total. I think a lot of you guys already knew I struggled with alcoholism and trying to get sober for years (I started trying 4 years ago). Now, while in our culture my amount doesn't seem completely outrageous - I'd drink about 2 to 4 times a week - every time I drank I got absolutely rip roaring drunk from 12-18+ beers in a night. It's the definition of binge drinking and it really did a number on me. Anyway here's what I've learned:
The Good:
- I lost weight. A lot of it without even trying. I was 240 and now I'm 215 and I barely go to the gym. 25 lbs gone in 6 months isn't too bad but it's kinda slowing down so I'm gonna start working out regularly. I want to be around 180.
- My nightmares are almost completely gone. I still get them every week - the usual bs with insects (wasps, spiders) but they are WAY, WAY, WAY less intense than they used to be. My sleep has improved so much I feel like I'm in heaven. You have no idea how good it feels to just sleep when you want without worrying about your dreams. It's truly a blessing.
- Therefore, my insect phobia began improving significantly. I have no issues going outside and just enjoying the weather. Well, not exactly but it's much better than before. I was deathly afraid of wasps since my subconscious tortured me with them so much lol. I started trying to challenge myself when I'm outside. Small stuff like walking by a bush infested with bugs without running, going to the mailbox when they are all about, etc... I just trying to push my boundaries daily because if I can do it once, I can do it again.
- Pimples cleared up. My chin especially used to be a landmine but now I rarely get pimples anymore and if I do they are generally small. My skin looks a lot better I think - especially comparing how I look to my driver's license.
- I can feel my life force restarting. This is so important to me. I hated feeling sluggish/tired constantly and not wanting to do anything at all. About 10ish days ago, I felt a growing energy inside of me like my body wanted to start running, jumping, living like it used to when I was younger. This was incredible.
- As a result I can also feel a lot of issues in my chakras clearing up. The pain is still there but it's not as bothersome or as frightening as it used to be.
- Subtle changes in my mental state. I can honestly say that I genuinely feel like a happier person today than I did when I was drinking. And it shows in my face and in my spirit. I love talking to my parents and they tell me how happy I look
instead of asking me what I'm worried about. I love that.
- Money. It's kind of funny how much more money I have now that I'm not wasting it on alcohol. More money = less work.
The Challenges:
- Finding stuff to fill up my time with. I'm really lucky because I know that I can fill it up with meditation but others won't be so fortunate and they'll have to find something else to do. Alcohol is a huge time waster and once you're free, you kinda wonder wtf to do and that usually ends up with picking up the bottle again.
- Having fun. This is something that takes literally years to develop and only gets better about 1-2 months after being sober. You can have FUN - real fun without being drunk. It feels different but it's cleaner and to be honest more fulfilling. I have absolutely no desire to drink in order to enjoy my time because I know I can hit that magical dopamine state just as easily if I do something that really engages me. Even then, it's still hard and sometimes I have to just sit back and take a few moments to realize that not everything has to be fun all the time. It's okay to just chill out and have down times.
- Meeting new people. This is a big one. Most of my friends drink and I'm still with them but I can't party or be around booze because it would put me in a weird state to not be able to enjoy the party with them. Just find other people who are sober or talk to them online. You kind of have to build up a new community from scratch but it's worth it. I'm fortunate because a lot of my psi friends are 100% sober so I feel like it's brought me closer to them.
Anyway that's mostly it, feel free to ask me any questions. There's a lot, lot more I didn't include because it's too personal for this kind of place but yeah. Hope everyone is doing alright.
To make a long story short - it healed my soul. I've been completely sober for 77 days, 16 hours and 56 minutes and 45 seconds (not that I'm counting) and this year I've only drank about 3 times total. I think a lot of you guys already knew I struggled with alcoholism and trying to get sober for years (I started trying 4 years ago). Now, while in our culture my amount doesn't seem completely outrageous - I'd drink about 2 to 4 times a week - every time I drank I got absolutely rip roaring drunk from 12-18+ beers in a night. It's the definition of binge drinking and it really did a number on me. Anyway here's what I've learned:
The Good:
- I lost weight. A lot of it without even trying. I was 240 and now I'm 215 and I barely go to the gym. 25 lbs gone in 6 months isn't too bad but it's kinda slowing down so I'm gonna start working out regularly. I want to be around 180.
- My nightmares are almost completely gone. I still get them every week - the usual bs with insects (wasps, spiders) but they are WAY, WAY, WAY less intense than they used to be. My sleep has improved so much I feel like I'm in heaven. You have no idea how good it feels to just sleep when you want without worrying about your dreams. It's truly a blessing.
- Therefore, my insect phobia began improving significantly. I have no issues going outside and just enjoying the weather. Well, not exactly but it's much better than before. I was deathly afraid of wasps since my subconscious tortured me with them so much lol. I started trying to challenge myself when I'm outside. Small stuff like walking by a bush infested with bugs without running, going to the mailbox when they are all about, etc... I just trying to push my boundaries daily because if I can do it once, I can do it again.
- Pimples cleared up. My chin especially used to be a landmine but now I rarely get pimples anymore and if I do they are generally small. My skin looks a lot better I think - especially comparing how I look to my driver's license.
- I can feel my life force restarting. This is so important to me. I hated feeling sluggish/tired constantly and not wanting to do anything at all. About 10ish days ago, I felt a growing energy inside of me like my body wanted to start running, jumping, living like it used to when I was younger. This was incredible.
- As a result I can also feel a lot of issues in my chakras clearing up. The pain is still there but it's not as bothersome or as frightening as it used to be.
- Subtle changes in my mental state. I can honestly say that I genuinely feel like a happier person today than I did when I was drinking. And it shows in my face and in my spirit. I love talking to my parents and they tell me how happy I look
instead of asking me what I'm worried about. I love that.- Money. It's kind of funny how much more money I have now that I'm not wasting it on alcohol. More money = less work
.The Challenges:
- Finding stuff to fill up my time with. I'm really lucky because I know that I can fill it up with meditation but others won't be so fortunate and they'll have to find something else to do. Alcohol is a huge time waster and once you're free, you kinda wonder wtf to do and that usually ends up with picking up the bottle again.
- Having fun. This is something that takes literally years to develop and only gets better about 1-2 months after being sober. You can have FUN - real fun without being drunk. It feels different but it's cleaner and to be honest more fulfilling. I have absolutely no desire to drink in order to enjoy my time because I know I can hit that magical dopamine state just as easily if I do something that really engages me. Even then, it's still hard and sometimes I have to just sit back and take a few moments to realize that not everything has to be fun all the time. It's okay to just chill out and have down times.
- Meeting new people. This is a big one. Most of my friends drink and I'm still with them but I can't party or be around booze because it would put me in a weird state to not be able to enjoy the party with them. Just find other people who are sober or talk to them online. You kind of have to build up a new community from scratch but it's worth it. I'm fortunate because a lot of my psi friends are 100% sober so I feel like it's brought me closer to them.
Anyway that's mostly it, feel free to ask me any questions. There's a lot, lot more I didn't include because it's too personal for this kind of place but yeah. Hope everyone is doing alright.
