Socially awkward or not? Please help me.

[Twixx]

Oh and for the sweating thing man treat it as a joke. WHO CARES? its just sweat bro stop sweating over sweat

That gave me some good thoughts. Yeah, but you don't want to smell bad if you want the girls and so on...that's maybe the thing I think about the most, since I'm single. Also, the feeling like I'm unsure about smelling bad or not (since I've told myself I've got a bad sence of smell which I'm not sure if I have)...

 

[thesuperappraiser]

I believe it doesnt happen to most of people. Well it is definitely psychological. Whenever u get this feeling, start to take deep breaths, really deep ones so that you feel your stomach moving. This will tend to calm your nerves down and hopefully you would get rid of sweating. Well it wouldn't hurt to seek professional help too. All the best

I have a similar problem. I'm far to involved with myself to care about other peoples problems. I just fake expressions. I'm disgusted with myself as a human being.

 

[west13]

Yea, thinking about it makes it worse. Try some meditation tehniques and take some time, couple a minutes a day to reinstate that you are awesome and this life is an experience. Just think how insignificant our action are compare to the majesty of the Universe. So just be more relaxed. Nothing really matters as much as we think it does. We just live in a fantasy world, people always look for flaws in others and not seeing they're own retard thinking and behaviour.

Just don't give a shit about ppl in general ( I'm talking about they're opinions). Every person see life completely different.

I hope what I said makes sense

 

[vitaliysem]

Man believe me shyness is a choice YOU choose to by shy. For example if you run outside right now and start screaming I love life or something you can do it but you are blocking yourself by saying "I am shy" its an excuse just go and do what you want to do man. The faster you learn that the more girls your gonna sleep with and the more fun your gonna have. The people that judge you are doing that because they fear you man. They fear you because theyr filled with negative emotions and anything to do with negativity is a feeling of fear.

 

[hardcorebiker]

Its called Social Anxiety. It happens to many of them. Just try researching more on that word "Social Anxiety"

 

[vitaliysem]

Guys PM me your emails and I will email you something that has helped me a lot!

 

[west13]

That gave me some good thoughts. Yeah, but you don't want to smell bad if you want the girls and so on...that's maybe the thing I think about the most, since I'm single. Also, the feeling like I'm unsure about smelling bad or not (since I've told myself I've got a bad sence of smell which I'm not sure if I have)...

had a part on my previous post on this but deleted but I will take time to say it.

As the girl part goes...try not to go into social interaction with girls and talk to them like some prospect girlfirends. Just have a normal conversation, if you don't have nothing to say just leave..don't force this kind of encounter just because you are horny. By having this aproach you will be more relaxed not having to deal with the presure and you will look interesting and they will look you up and give you the signals of aproach.

 

[Twixx]

Admire people who thinks like you, west13 and vitaliysem.

west13 - I don't know why I can't think like that. Maybe I'm just to immature to think about the univers in whole and too selfish? Shy people are really selfish since they think about themself more that others...

vitaliysem - Speaking of it, I would actually like run outside screaming right now. But my parents would think I'm crazy and so on ^^. Maybe I should start putting up achievements from day to day?
Also the thing about people who judge fear, there's some point in that. For example today, I got some new clothes on that I've never wore before, like a new shirt (like those nice ones that people in my age don't ware). Directly when entering the school, a friend of mine said "Hey snob" or something like that....that's when I start sweating when trying to defend myself...

 

[HoNeYBiRD]

most of the times when a thread like this pops up, i cannot decide whether an admin is that bored that he hijacks an account for the lulz or these are real people with real problems

 

[Twixx]

had a part on my previous post on this but deleted but I will take time to say it.

As the girl part goes...try not to go into social interaction with girls and talk to them like some prospect girlfirends. Just have a normal conversation, if you don't have nothing to say just leave..don't force this kind of encounter just because you are horny. By having this aproach you will be more relaxed not having to deal with the presure and you will look interesting and they will look you up and give you the signals of aproach.

That's another part I've got problem with. I want all girls to "like" me, or I see them as possible girlfriend material. Even girls much younger than me I try to "impress" or something. (Non pedo though )... Guess that's something you could try not to think about!

 

[shurk]

It may sound counter intuitive, but keep putting yourself in these 'Sweaty' situations.

I say this from the perspective of someone who does also suffer from anxiety. In fact, I had it so bad when I was at Uni that I decided to drop out (Got so far behind on the work, and I didn't see any point in getting into a lifetime of debt for a shitty degree).

I also DJ, so I can totally relate to you with a similar situation. I play on Pirate radio, and at first, I would leave the studio literally dripping with sweat. I kept at it, because I enjoy it, and now I only sweat when I play in clubs I'm never by myself on radio, and I know that who I am with also has a keen interest in DJing and music too. So I know they will hear all of my mistakes. This lead me to sort of 'over amplify' what I was thinking/feeling at the time leading me to get nervous and then sweat.

Practice makes perfect, so keep sticking at it. Eventually everything will fall into place and you will soon wonder why you made a big deal out of it.

Also, when you start sweating, try and move your thoughts to your breathing instead of thinking about sweating. I've often found that when nervous etc, 10 calm and controlled breaths can do the world of good (This really helped me with the situation I mentioned, and others).

All the best!

 

[Twixx]

Its called Social Anxiety. It happens to many of them. Just try researching more on that word "Social Anxiety"

And this is something that you could treat yourself? It seams like most people just say, "go to someone professional"...

 

[Twixx]

It may sound counter intuitive, but keep putting yourself in these 'Sweaty' situations.

I say this from the perspective of someone who does also suffer from anxiety. In fact, I had it so bad when I was at Uni that I decided to drop out (Got so far behind on the work, and I didn't see any point in getting into a lifetime of debt for a shitty degree).

I also DJ, so I can totally relate to you with a similar situation. I play on Pirate radio, and at first, I would leave the studio literally dripping with sweat. I kept at it, because I enjoy it, and now I only sweat when I play in clubs I'm never by myself on radio, and I know that who I am with also has a keen interest in DJing and music too. So I know they will hear all of my mistakes. This lead me to sort of 'over amplify' what I was thinking/feeling at the time leading me to get nervous and then sweat.

Practice makes perfect, so keep sticking at it. Eventually everything will fall into place and you will soon wonder why you made a big deal out of it.

Also, when you start sweating, try and move your thoughts to your breathing instead of thinking about sweating. I've often found that when nervous etc, 10 calm and controlled breaths can do the world of good (This really helped me with the situation I mentioned, and others).

All the best!

Thanks for a informative answer!

But when you DJ, I think it's pretty normal to be nervous and sweating a bit. I mean, you perform and people listen to you and so on. I think that's socially accepted! It's the "talking to people I don't know"-sweating that's the worse... Like, some can't believe you get nervous only by talking to someone. It's just not normal...

 

[vitaliysem]

Admire people who thinks like you, west13 and vitaliysem.

west13 - I don't know why I can't think like that. Maybe I'm just to immature to think about the univers in whole and too selfish? Shy people are really selfish since they think about themself more that others...

vitaliysem - Speaking of it, I would actually like run outside screaming right now. But my parents would think I'm crazy and so on ^^. Maybe I should start putting up achievements from day to day?
Also the thing about people who judge fear, there's some point in that. For example today, I got some new clothes on that I've never wore before, like a new shirt (like those nice ones that people in my age don't ware). Directly when entering the school, a friend of mine said "Hey snob" or something like that....that's when I start sweating when trying to defend myself...

Yeah he is scared/jealous same thing! YOU are the boss of your life so why would you even defend yourself when someone tries to ruin your mood just look at him and say cool story bro and walk away

 

[Twixx]

Yeah he is scared/jealous same thing! YOU are the boss of your life so why would you even defend yourself when someone tries to ruin your mood just look at him and say cool story bro and walk away

And there's another problem. I mostly hang out with persons in the same gang. Nowhere to walk away to...

 

[west13]

Look. I used to be really shy and socially awkard. I sucked at sports and girls. In middle school some stupid bitch ( I'm not insulting, she was really stupid, like low IQ or smth) gave my a nickname something like a slang for pussy ( female body part) just bc I was shy and wasn't socializing too much. Mostly daydreamed.

Here came highschool and said fuck it, at least I wont get pushed around. Even tried to hook up with some girls but was still acting awkard. Anyway had a good time the last 2 years of highschool not because I got some kick ass girlfriends ( actually not one) but mostly because I didn't gave too much shit on what ppl thinks about me. and trust me I've been into some serious awkard moments...like one time in 3-4 grade or smth I went into a field trip and I was so shy to go to the bathroom in the middle of a theatre play that I pissed myself. Had to go back home from another city in a bus with my pants pissed. Happened once in highschool too, pissed myself in 9 grade in front of my home door when I came back from school just b/c I was shy to piss in the school toilets.

Anyway, got carried away with my life story there. But those days are gone. How: I just went and didn't gave a shit about what ppl think about me. And this fixes a lot. Like your sweating, shyness, social awkardness.

I had something related like you said to me once. I was with my best friend at this 2 sisters house.. later one when the light went off we were making out with those sisters but I got really hot, it was already pretty warm in the room so I started sweating really heavy. She did asked me why I am sweating like that but I just said it is hot and also might be from an bad food habbot. But fk it didn't tought to much about it and didn't saw a reason to babble about it. We are humans we are not perfect.

Everybody got flaws and have awkard moments. Some hide it better. Just realize i wrote a lot of stuff and don't know if it is somewhat of help or on topic..but FUCK IT. i'll press post. Just be relaxed.

 

[Twixx]

Look. I used to be really shy and socially awkard. I sucked at sports and girls. In middle school some stupid bitch ( I'm not insulting, she was really stupid, like low IQ or smth) gave my a nickname something like a slang for pussy ( female body part) just bc I was shy and wasn't socializing too much. Mostly daydreamed.

Here came highschool and said fuck it, at least I wont get pushed around. Even tried to hook up with some girls but was still acting awkard. Anyway had a good time the last 2 years of highschool not because I got some kick ass girlfriends ( actually not one) but mostly because I didn't gave too much shit on what ppl thinks about me. and trust me I've been into some serious awkard moments...like one time in 3-4 grade or smth I went into a field trip and I was so shy to go to the bathroom in the middle of a theatre play that I pissed myself. Had to go back home from another city in a bus with my pants pissed. Happened once in highschool too, pissed myself in 9 grade in front of my home door when I came back from school just b/c I was shy to piss in the school toilets.

Anyway, got carried away with my life story there. But those days are gone. How: I just went and didn't gave a shit about what ppl think about me. And this fixes a lot. Like your sweating, shyness, social awkardness.

I had something related like you said to me once. I was with my best friend at this 2 sisters house.. later one when the light went off we were making out with those sisters but I got really hot, it was already pretty warm in the room so I started sweating really heavy. She did asked me why I am sweating like that but I just said it is hot and also might be from an bad food habbot. But fk it didn't tought to much about it and didn't saw a reason to babble about it. We are humans we are not perfect.

Everybody got flaws and have awkard moments. Some hide it better. Just realize i wrote a lot of stuff and don't know if it is somewhat of help or on topic..but FUCK IT. i'll press post. Just be relaxed.

REALLY really appreciate that you take time writing and helping as much as you do!

I think I tomorrow will try to act as relaxed and worry free as possible. Won't think about what others say and wont think about not sweating, just play it out and see how it goes! Will update you tomorrow how it went.

Thanks again everybody,

//Twixx

 

[adh0c]

Yeah, wrong forum for this but I have the same thing man. I really don't want to reply here on this but I know how bad it sucks. It's called Hyperhidrosis. Seems kind of silly but it can change your entire life.

Mine is/was from anxiety and once it starts, it don't stop until your some where your comfortable again. You can get it due to other problems like a Hyperthyroid and some other stuff that your Doc can run a simple blood test on... but from what you explain it sounds more anxiety related.

I say mine is/was because I found some stuff called Anhydrol-Forte, much like Certain-dry and a couple others, but Anhydrol-Forte actually stopped the sweating within the first couple days of use. Certain-dry and a few others, including doc prescribed, I tried didn't quite work. I get my Anhydrol-Forte from a site called superliving.co.uk for like $6.50 a bottle and it lasts a while. It's the only thing that helped me and I've went to extreme to try and get rid of it (like setting up appointment with surgeon to cut my nerve in arm-pits but insurance wouldn't cover and then almost just straight burning my arm-pit with a lighter to seal the pores).

Another thing is recognizing what causes the anxiety and try to address that. Confidence is a major factor and beyond my good ole Anhydrol-Forte, working-out helped that significantly... not that I ever felt like it would or that I had confidence issues. I was that same "I try to be the one who don't care about what other people think" type of person as well. I treated the gym as an outlet, it's normal to sweat there and it gets you used to dealing with it while around other people. Before long you'll get a higher sense of confidence, to me- its like wearing a bullet-proof vest. Any more, lifting/exercise is a huge part of my life and it stems from my sweating/anxiety. It didn't make me stop sweating but helped me deal with the anxiety surrounding it. This is what helped the secondary sweating, or Plantar Hyperhidrosis (sweaty feet) in your case, the most IMO as Secondary is not usually as intense as the arm-pit/primary and much easier to "control" mentally when you have the confidence.

Currently I use the Anhydrol-Forte about 4 times a week at night before bed and that stops the pit sweat 100%. The secondary sweating stopped when I noticed people treat you different when you've been busting your ass in the gym for a while. I can't stop working out for more than a week or two now without getting that same anxiety feeling when you start sweating for no fkn reason... hard to explain.. but like a half-worthless lazy feeling. Hope that helps though, dealing with this can be seriously depressing if you can't figure out how to control it. If I was you though, I would avoid Anxiety meds... I tried a couple and didn't like how it made me feel. If your going to take something, Weed helped me deal with the Anxiety. Some people it does the opposite for though so.. yeah. I don't smoke pot any more but years of busting ass in the gym and still using Anhydrol-Forte, I never have problems with excessive uncontrolled sweating anymore.

Such the wrong place for this.