I've found it hurts (me) less f I sell someone else's kidney.
Ok, OP, here is my suggestion for $1,000 in a week with minimal investment.
Items you'll need
- Duct tape
- Hole saw
- Marker
- Knee pads
- 4ft of rope
- Cell phone with stripe
Now, find a public bathroom, cut a 4" hole about waist height, pad the sides with duct tape(I mean we're not heathens here). Above the hole write "free blowjobs". Now, go to the other side, and put on the kneepads, might be here for awhile. Once someone gets curious and... Well... Let's say "inserts themself" through the nicely padded hole, loop the rope over the end and pull tight: tie it to the toilet if nessesary. Demand $1,000 to be released, tell them you accept credit cards. Once paid, run away without untieing them, as they will be out to kill you.
This may be illegal in your country, so consult your laws beforehand, I am not responsible for any issues that arse from taking my advice.