Why do I live this life?

Why not just apply for the job. If you get it, try it out. If you like it stay with it and if not you can always come back, we'll all still be here.

I was feeling like this before..

always asking myself if CPA company will pay me. What if they found out where my traffic comes from.

What if I just look for a stable job so I will not be worried about getting paid or not.

but look at it now it's already been 2 years and I'm still getting paid from CPA..

Everything in life is a risk and a learning experience.

Stop working from home, start investing in different projects. The wider the portfolio, the lesser the risk.

Thanks for all the replies! I don't know, I just feel at times that I had enough of this business.
I had a side affiliate program making $1,000+/month. They changed the rules, lose that.
My CC processor drops me one of my main money sites, it's grey area and having a hard time getting a new processor.
Same site, get hit by Google.
Another affiliate, I was using their name in my URL, they asked me to take it down, another $1000+/month gone.
I sound like a bitch, but I just get discouraged. All the work I put in and it gets wiped out.

VinceC said:

second guessing kill.... just do it.

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I know, I never used to, but now I do.

ok888 said:

Because we want alot MORE in life than a simple task job that pay paycheck to paycheck

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Tha'ts what I tell myself all the time, i don't want to be 'normal'. But sometimes I just think about taking the easy way out. And it's not like it's a $60k/year job where it's okay money, it's $100k+ plus great pension.

BENNY8877 said:

You really need to diversify into other areas other than online. As you say, if Google decides to release another algo which destroys everything that you build then you are sunk, but if you have a hand in other businesses, (offline) you'll be okay.

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I did offline business and lost a shitload of money!

antichrist said:

I do it for the freedom is brings.

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That's the thing. Ive never worked for anyone in my life, so I don't know how bad it is working for someone. I think if I ever did get a job I would hate it so fast because I've never worked for anyone.

meathead1234 said:

Have you thought about getting a small office (co-working might be a good option) shared with some other entrepreneurs? You might find separating work from home life will sort out your work life balance a little and spending time with like-minded entrepreneurs will stop you second guessing yourself about getting a 9-5.

Also sounds like you need to get something sustainable going. If all your income is reliant on Google, maybe you should diversify a little. I know I sleep a lot better at night knowing that my business isn't reliant on Google or anything similar.

I personally do it as I'm not very good at taking orders and don't like the idea of my hard work benefiting someone else.

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It was sustainable for a long long time, just last few years some things took a turn. I was going to get an office so I could get out of the house, and just kidna put it off. I have a buddy that owns a small office building with a lot of empty space, and talked about it with thim, but then I just kinda put it off. That is what I need. But at the same time, I like to take a break here and there, see my kids, etc. Rather than be gone all day. I feel I'll be just like the 9-5ers if I'm gone all day to work in an office.

zubidoo said:

because you don't have to answer to ANYONE. There's no boss or condescending manager to report to. You're in charge of everything and you reap the rewards of your own hard work. You're not working for someone else. You're probably wary from the high risk/variable cash flow that comes with ecommerce. You could use a long term money plan and start saving up to invest in something more stable like real estate so that when google hits you with an update, at least you'll have rental income coming in.

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Yea I said above, I never had to work for anyone before, so I think that's why I don't realize how good it is to be self employed, I have never answered to anyone, ever.

eimFlood said:

Op,

Everyone is living this life. Some just don't realize it.

The idea of absolute job security is a myth. Ask anyone that gets hit when there's an "economic downturn" or when the economy is good but "downsizing" starts because a company made some bad choices.

Diversify. It doesn't matter if you are doing IM or working as a conductor. It's just as easy, if not easier, to put all your eggs into one basket when you work a 9 to 5 job. What happens if you get fired or the company goes out of business? Government jobs are not immune, either.

Save. Get as much saved as you can... long-term investments, tax-sheltered retirement plans, and good ole' savings accounts.

Learn. The more skills you acquire, the more true security you'll have.

Go launch your site. You know as well as I do that the only thing that's guaranteed is that your site won't succeed if you don't launch it.

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Thing is, where I live we are pretty stable, we had no down turn here, and the company is a massive company that grows every year, no lay offs anytime soon, that's for sure.

clovers said:

It is better to build something of your own instead of breaking your back building an empire for someone else to profit. There will be plenty of times that you will doubt and feel discouraged. You must keep pushing forward during these times. Try listening to motivational videos or audio to keep you going. There are plenty of things that will keep you motivated but it all starts from within. Good Luck.

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I used to listen to motivational stuff. I think I have to step back and do it again. Thanks.

BHopkins said:

Why not just apply for the job. If you get it, try it out. If you like it stay with it and if not you can always come back, we'll all still be here.

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I did apply for it, and seems like I pretty much have the job, they are hiring tons right now. Few years yearly salary would be about $120,000. And the $65,000 pension is so tempting. That being said, I heard the job sucks. It's on call, so you don't ahve a regular schedule. And you have to go away overnight sometimes... I don't care about that too much, because if I do stuff online I'd just work when I'm away, and might even be nice having quiet time.
That being said, training is 5weeks in classroom and it's only $160/day. AFter that five weeks it's like 4-5 months training in the yard, still only $160/day. But after that you get full salary pay. So first year is about $85,000 they say, then $100,000, then a few years you're an engineer and make about $110-$120,000.

ok888 said:

Because we want alot MORE in life than a simple task job that pay paycheck to paycheck

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Totally agreed.

I prefer to work for myself than for others, it applies to you op

Just stay focused and determined, I know things can get rough and from the sounds of it, you have a lot on your plate and a lot of responsibility. Don't let these obligations of yours hinder your enthusiasm for success with IM, from experience, I know relying on IM as a source of income can sometimes be scary with not knowing if an update will wipe out your income. However, it's important to stay dedicated to continuing your effort(s) in to making income. The potential you have with IM is much greater then going to work for someone else so if you can make it with IM, I'd stick with it.

Also, a healthy balance between work and family is important, again, I know this can be difficult at times but it's both important not only for your self and mental health but for your family as well.

Anyways, I wish you much luck and I hope everything works out the best for you.

I live my life very much like you because it gives me control. I get to control my schedule, my income and the work I do. You're also forgetting you can pickup your computer and work from anywhere.

you are lucky OP and im Lucky as well. there are many people who wish they have what we have!
i dont like to open up but let me tell you something im alive just because of IM i build/design a website fill the content and then i delete my hosting account after 2-3 months so i start from scratch and stay busy i cant talk to people my eyes start watering when i do and there alot more things but in short i tried to kill myself 3-4 times but failed and im getting help and feeling ok now... what im trying to say is there are people in worst conditions than you and they still trying to live and smile.No-one knows if they gonna live tomorrow or not so dont worry about google update...

I choose the thug life until the day I die.

There is no such thing as retirement. Especially during these times. It's not good to think that way OP.

Screw google and build your own empire.

1. Diversify your income source that are proven more secure - or invest in property.
2. Change in environment to rejuvenate your spirits.
3. Take longer breaks at different intervals

Everyone saying to diversify is correct but the truth is, it is just not that cut and dry.

When you have bills to pay, you have to get it done and sticking with what you know is easiest, at least for me. And OP, I feel your pain. I had one method making me about 25k-30k a month. The company did not like my tactics, got paid, but that was it. That income stream just disappeared over night.

I think that you really want to take that job, but like all/most of us, you're not willing to let go the idea that there will be a hot method in the mind tonight, will hit jackpot before next dusk, an extra-bright Sunrise the day after, and a pot full of gold nuggets inside the front door on the weekend, and then every day will be like Christmas Day thereafter... Most of the time, it never happens though. It happens to all others, but never in our lives it seems.

I'd suggest that go for it, for the family at least. You'll still carry your brain around, a laptop connected to the world, and you may still get those ideas that can still make you lucky online! Of course, you'll find time to use them all. Sometimes (99% times) we need to put the family and its security first on our agenda... I don't think you'll be making a huge mistake in life if you opt for that job. Good Luck!

HTH


P.S.:
Online money-making: You're still making huge amounts of money to someone else, BEFORE you do it to yourself, if at all... think of it too.

This thread a lot drawing a clear picture this career. Yes I know it's sucks when you're been after those years, at the age of 34 you've seen enough rise and fall and you're feel like an old soldier and the man in your blood fading away after time.

"Why do you live this life?" Because our generation growing up that from computer and relate careers much involve, it's used to something superior, life style and cool. I'm a single 34 years old guy who working 10 hours + a day on computer IM just like you. Guess what the others thinking about me, most of women don't know what I do and thought I'm a computer geek.

This kind of question you should have asking yourself years ago and so do I. Let's me fill in some blank you've not add yet. You're now a lot different position. YOU GOT A FAMILY, your wife and your kids need more your care, your health also important. Working 10 hours plus daily, I'm afraid you can not keeping your good sharp just a few years later from now (when one reach 40).

If I'm you, I should talk a lot to my wife something you guy can do together, work a plan out to raise your kids. You can keep your IM career but need some scale up, try something more automatically and teamwork. There a quote something like, something does make you money it's good, but simple one is better

Good responses in this thread here. Diversifying, getting an office, moving to a cheaper country. All top advice.

But yeah, I can totally relate. It is very difficult to make a good living from IM if you live in a country where 100K a year is an average wage for a skilled worker.

Exactly the same thing happening to me. The only difference is i am still single. Well for me, this is the only way to get the money I want. Starting my own offline business is my dream ever since i was a kid and for that i need some good amount of money..... IM is the only thing that can bring me closer to my dream.

ThreadKiller said:

Good responses in this thread here. Diversifying, getting an office, moving to a cheaper country. All top advice.

But yeah, I can totally relate. It is very difficult to make a good living from IM if you live in a country where 100K a year is an average wage for a skilled worker.

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Average salary is probably under $50k, that's why the job is so tempting. Cost of living here is fairly low. I could live quite well off $100k. And like I said, $65k a year when I retire for pension.

Very motivating story, it oppened my mind. Thanks for sharing

jon_xx_x said:

Average salary is probably under $50k, that's why the job is so tempting. Cost of living here is fairly low. I could live quite well off $100k. And like I said, $65k a year when I retire for pension.

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Ok ask yourself, what likely to happen? The job is taken by someone else, or your IM idea is stolen by someone else?
Grab the job first and think later. Worse case is that you still got a job

Sounds like you already know what you want to do.