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Why Americans should never be allowed to travel!

Discussion in 'BlackHat Lounge' started by premiumsource, Jan 3, 2009.

  1. premiumsource

    premiumsource Senior Member

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    The following are actual stories provided by travel agents:



    I had someone ask for an aisle seats so that his or her hair wouldn't get messed up by being near the window.

    A client called in inquiring about a package to Hawaii. After going over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to California and then take the train to Hawaii?"

    I got a call from a woman who wanted to go to Capetown. I started to explain the length of the flight and the passport information when she interrupted me with "I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but Capetown is in Massachusetts. "Without trying to make her look like the stupid one, I calmly explained, "Capecod is in Massachusetts, Capetown is in Africa." Her response ... click.

    A man called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was expecting an ocean-view room. I tried to explain that is not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of the state. He replied, "Don't lie to me. I looked on the map and Florida is a very thin state."

    I got a call from a man who asked, "Is it possible to see England from Canada?" I said, "No." He said "But they look so close on the map."

    Another man called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas. When I pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had a 1-hour lay over in Dallas. When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, "I heard Dallas was a big airport, and I need a car to drive between the gates to save time."

    A nice lady just called. She needed to know how it was possible that her flight from Detroit left at 8:20am and got into Chicago at 8:33am. I tried to explain that Michigan was an hour ahead of llinois, but she could not understand the concept of time zones. Finally I told her the plane went very fast, and she bought that!

    A woman called and asked, "Do airlines put your physical description on your bag so they know who's luggage belongs to who?" I said, "No, why do you ask?" She replied, "Well, when I checked in with the airline, they put a tag on my luggage that said FAT, and I'm overweight, is there any connection?" After putting her on hold for a minute while I "looked into it" (I was actually laughing) I came back and explained the city code for Fresno is FAT, and that the airline was just putting a destination tag on her luggage.

    I just got off the phone with a man who asked, "How do I know which plane to get on?" I asked him what exactly he meant, which he replied, "I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these darn planes have numbers on them."

    A woman called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-cola on one of those computer planes." I asked if she meant to fly to Pensacola on a commuter plane. She said, "Yeah, whatever."

    A businessman called and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him he needed a visa. "Oh no I don't, I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those." I double checked and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said, "Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express."

    A woman called to make reservations, "I want to go from Chicago to Hippopotamus, New York" The agent was at a loss for words. Finally, the agent: "Are you sure that's the name of the town?" "Yes, what flights do you have?" replied the customer. After some searching, the agent came back with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport code in the country and can't find a Hippopotamus anywhere." The customer retorted, "Oh don't be silly. Everyone knows where it is. Check your map!" The agent scoured a map of the state of New York and finally offered, "You don't mean Buffalo, do you?" "That's it! I knew it was a big animal!"
     
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  2. aмillionaírе

    aмillionaírе Jr. VIP Jr. VIP Premium Member

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    I cracked myself up when I should be entertaining my GF and working at the same time, darn.
     
  3. justthinking

    justthinking BANNED BANNED

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    I am sure it is not just Americans. I would bet half the worlds' population don't know where they are, let alone any other locale they would want to travel to.
     
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  4. premiumsource

    premiumsource Senior Member

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    Very true.


     
  5. laveciar

    laveciar Registered Member

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    Priceless, my wife has told me horror stories from her times as a travel agent. I would have to say though the one about the retard and the american express has to be my favorite. Thanks for the chuckle.

    Cheers
     
  6. daffy

    daffy Regular Member

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    that's hilarious I've cracked my self up but hey...I don't get the "A client called in inquiring about a package to Hawaii. After going over all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to California and then take the train to Hawaii?", one...could someone eloberate??
     
  7. themagician

    themagician Regular Member

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    '...Not just Americans.

    I can spot someone who hasn't travelled outside their own country a mile off.

    Travel really does broaden the mind and opens up all kinds of opportunities.

    I can never understand why someone would grow up in one neighbourhood, go to school there, get a job there and then marry a girl from a round the corner and stay living there and raising children who also never move out of the neighbourhood, as my brother has done.

    I have been around the world several times. Hell, I'm just deciding , "Where to next?"

    Funny stories. Thanks for upload'.

    themagician
     
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  8. justthinking

    justthinking BANNED BANNED

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    It sounds like a way to save some money in my opinion. The train to Hawaii is much cheaper than airfare. When I took the train to Hawaii, it was about a third of the cost. LOL
     
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  9. darklegion

    darklegion Regular Member

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    That was a very funny read! I can't believe there are people that are like that, makes me worried...
     
  10. Axem

    Axem Registered Member

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    last i checked there isnt a train that goes from the west coast of the US all the way into the middle of the pacific ocean :p
     
  11. Strider

    Strider Junior Member

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    These are very funny. "But i can see Canada from England":)
     
  12. l3east

    l3east Registered Member

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    Lol this was funny.I actually enjoyd reading this
     
  13. The Scarlet Pimp

    The Scarlet Pimp Jr. VIP Jr. VIP Premium Member

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    1. I once spoke to an American phone operator who didn't know that Hawaii was part of the
    States.

    2. I once heard an American woman refer to Canada as an "overseas country"...
     
  14. Sanitarium

    Sanitarium Regular Member

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    Haha, that's how you can tell those who never had an atlas as a kid, it's not about traveling at all, it's just those geography days as kids, if you never had them then, now you won't find picking up a map exciting.

    It's not just Americans, but from my experience America has the highest % of people who think that America is the world and they don't need to know the names of places, locations outside of it.

    Me love Americans, what other tourists are we gonna charge double the price? :)
     
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  15. Wyld88

    Wyld88 Newbie

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    Some funny stuff.. but as others have pointed out.. it's not just Americans.

    I've seen other nationalities do some pretty bizarre stuff in airports over the years.
     
  16. beefsupreme

    beefsupreme Junior Member

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    Hilarious post! Cracked me up :D

    I have found that Americans are the most geographically challenged westerners, in general that is. But that's just my experience.
     
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  17. premiumsource

    premiumsource Senior Member

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    Wow! Both of you should be on the list :eek:



     
  18. atlascopy

    atlascopy Junior Member

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    OMG, that's pretty frightening actually. Almost as good as the computer technician from a call in service center. The best one from that was the guy who thought a CD rom drive was a cup holder. LOL
     
  19. aмillionaírе

    aмillionaírе Jr. VIP Jr. VIP Premium Member

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    All humans keep money in my pocket so lest shall I complain.

    :D