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What A Fxxking joke!

Discussion in 'BlackHat Lounge' started by Hawkster, Feb 12, 2014.

  1. Hawkster

    Hawkster Jr. VIP Jr. VIP

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    Ok just a bit of fun. post your favourite joke. Or something you find hilarious, a quote, a picture, a video, anything you think is funny.

    Heres mine, not new but one of my favourites.


    Three guys died and when St. Peter met them at the pearly gates, he said, "I know that you guys are forgiven because you're here. Before I let you into Heaven, I have to ask you something. You have to have a car in Heaven because Heaven is so big. What kind of car you get will depend on your answer."

    The first guy walked up and St. Peter asked him, "How long were you married?" He answered, "24 years." "Did you ever cheat on your wife?", St. Peter asked. The guy said, "Yeah, 7 times ... but you said I was forgiven." St. Peter said, "Yeah, but that's not too good, only Nano for you."

    The second guy walked up and got the same question from St. Peter. He answered, "I was married for 41 years and cheated on her once, but that was our first year and we really worked it out." St. Peter said, "I'm pleased to hear that. Here's a Civic."

    The third guy walked up and said, "St. Peter, I know what you're going to ask. I was married for 63 years and didn't even look at another woman! I treated my wife like a queen!" St. Peter said, "That's what I like to hear. Here's a Ferrari!"

    A few days later, the two guys with the Nano and Civic saw the guy with the Ferrari, crying on the golden sidewalk. They asked him what was wrong, aren't you supposed to be happy with your Ferrari? He said, "Yeah I'm happy with Ferrari but I just saw my wife go by on a skateboard!"



    Post yours! The post with the most likes on the 31st of december 2014 wins $1.000.000
     
  2. Snckr

    Snckr BANNED BANNED

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    Post yours! The post with the most likes on the 31st of december 2014 wins $1.000.000

    That's a good one :)
     
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  3. MadStacks

    MadStacks BANNED BANNED

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    Three rats enter a bar for some drinks and the conversation goes..

    Rat A - I am so tough I eat nails for breakfast.
    Rat B - Shit dat aint nothing I'm from the block I am so tough I drink rat poison for breakfast.

    Third rat grabs his coat and start walking out the door. Other two rats yell "hey where ya goin chicken shit"

    Rat C turns around " Going home to F*ck the cat"
     
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  4. Rustled Jimmies

    Rustled Jimmies Newbie

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    Came up with this recently...

    What's the difference between money and dead children?

    I don't stash money under my floor boards.

    (I apologize to everyone that doesn't like dark/twisted humour)
     
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  5. Conor

    Conor Jr. VIP Jr. VIP

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  6. iBrazilian

    iBrazilian Regular Member

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    "1.000.000 new accounts created to BHW"
     
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  7. lancis

    lancis Elite Member

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    One day, a 12 year old boy walks into a whorehouse dragging a dead frog on a string. He stomps up to the counter and says to the madam, "I wanna woman."

    "I'm sorry," she says, "but we don't let boys your age have a woman." The little boy slams a hundred dollar bill down on the counter and says, "I wanna woman!" So the madam asks him what kind of woman he wants.

    "A skanky one," he replies. "I want her to have AIDS, Syphilis, crabs, the works. I want the nastiest whore in the place."

    Offended, the madam says, "We don't have women like that here." So the boy slams another hundred down, and the madam points to a room down the hall and says "last door on the right."

    The boy walks down the hall, dragging his dead frog on a string, and goes into the room. He screws the hell out of the woman, and then leaves (still dragging his dead frog on a string). Just as he's getting ready to leave, the madam calls him over and asks why on earth he would want someone so nasty.

    "Well, it's like this," he says, "I'm gonna go home about seven o'clock tonight, and I'm gonna have sex with my babysitter. Then when mom and dad come home about nine o' clock, dad's gonna take the babysitter home, and he's gonna screw her. Then dad's gonna come home, and him and mom are gonna go to bed, and they'll screw. In the morning, dad will leave for work, and the milkman will stop by, and mom will have sex with him....

    ...AND THAT THE SON Of A BITCH WHO RAN OVER MY FROG !!!!!
     
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  8. lord1027

    lord1027 Elite Member

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    Matt Cutts now supports BlackHatters!
     
  9. OrangeNRG

    OrangeNRG Jr. VIP Jr. VIP Premium Member

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    [​IMG]
     
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  10. Hawkster

    Hawkster Jr. VIP Jr. VIP

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    Got to add this here, made me laugh hard.



    original thread here on bhw

    Code:
    http://www.blackhatworld.com/blackhat-seo/blackhat-lounge/645970-hardcore-sex-youtube.html#post6521312
     
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    Last edited by a moderator: May 18, 2016
  11. Hawkster

    Hawkster Jr. VIP Jr. VIP

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