Screaming of the Snails

Amsterdammer

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Okay, I am not one to make a lot of threads but perhaps this should change.


I want to talk with you about snails. Not your favorite creatures? I agree!

Okay, snails need to be here, I don't care what you believe in but they need to be here or they would not be here. But, why do they have to be on my balcony?
Because I have plants there? I disagree...

Now, I have a broad interest and just happen to know that snails are truly DIY. I mean, they build their own home for crying out loud and if it needs repairing they know how to do that too! Spiders may know how to build traps, Chimps may use a stick to get ants and Gorilla's may build a platform to sleep on but snails? Come on... They actually build a Home for themselves! lol
Respect where it is due right? Not for originality or creativity, but still...

In fact, studies show that snail slime helps in recovery time in humans when wounded. I got this from tv, selling a product made of the stuff but still...
I mean, knowing this I have no problem picking them up and throwing them over the balcony. It comforts my human feelings to know they get punishment for their trespassings but will recover in the end.
No harm done. Right?

Recently though, they started to make sound! Let's call it evolution or whatever but it keeps me up at night. :(
I mean, I pick them up, I hear them screaming and then throw them over a cliff. Mind you, I do mind the birds and have learned where to throw in the dark but still...

I can punish humans, can justify suffering when actions are done. But a snail just being All He Can Be and then screaming for mercy before I throw it bothers me.:o

Good thing I can be a total hypocrite too. I talked to my Mum about it and she gave me a lousy advise.
What I did tonight is I bought some beer. She recommended dark beer and the 12% I got looks dark. I also bought the cheapest beer I got get (Euroshopper) and put a cup and a dish of beer.

Snails may be slow, but they know fun when they smell it. They Likes Beer!
Being lower on the IQ scale they have a fancy for cheap beer too as my Euroshopper cup of beer gets more action than my dish of 12% Atlas beer.
Not that I mind, I like my Atlas.

Tomorrow I will have a look at how many I caught but at least I don't have to listen to the screaming snails anymore. They go in silence now. :abducted:

**Pictures on request. Don't blame me when snails drink themselves to death. I provide options, nothing more!!1!1!!!** :cool:
 
They like beer and pot. True story: My brother in law was trying to start some pot seeds. He would sprout them in a damp rag and then transplant them to some flower pots outside. They would get up an inch or two and suddenly disappear. This happened a couple of times.

One evening I came in from work right around dark and saw his flower pots on the porch and those snails where munching down on his plants.

Those snails really know how to party!:rock:
 
There is nothing i regret more in my life than the 2 minutes i just spent reading this.
 
I knew a snail with an inferiority complex once. He saved up all his money and bougt a new corvette, then had the body pulled off and had a custom one put on there with a great big "S" on each door.

I asked him why he did it and he said,

"When I leave the red light, every one will say "Look at that "S" car go!!!""
 
I knew a snail with an inferiority complex once. He saved up all his money and bougt a new corvette, then had the body pulled off and had a custom one put on there with a great big "S" on each door.

I asked him why he did it and he said,

"When I leave the red light, every one will say "Look at that "S" car go!!!""

It wouldn't be safe from jazzc tho. :P

But, it does show snail mentality. They got to have the best. I actually agree with them there, my strawberries taste great. My herbs do too. But after they get some time alone with it...

Anyways, they now go happy to their end. Makes me feel bad as a human to hear them scream before they do. :o
 
Usually when they get drunk they just start laughing and fall in......
 
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