Please bash my landing page

toptoptop

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Hi guys, I want to hear your opinions about my landerhttp://www.blackhatworld.com/blackhat-seo/attachments/pay-per-view/13037d1339491296-please-bash-my-landing-page-screen.gif
 

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I don't like it at all. I mean I could design one that is 20x better. Get a refund, if you bought it.


How to improve :
Make it easier on the eyes
Better Layout


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Well I'd like if you'll be more detailed about it, e.g. what you didn't like and how would you improve it.
 
I did, but do you want more?

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I'm sorry, I haven't saw it, looks like you've edited your post after my reply :)
Get a refund, if you bought it.
No I did myself :)
Make it easier on the eyes
Better Layout
What would you suggest? will changing colors help out, e.g. would it be better to use white background+black text here?
Also what can you say about the text, is it also crappy? Should I get off yellow background selection in the text or/and in top and bottem and use bold or something else?
 
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I'm sorry, I haven't saw it, looks like you've edited your post after my reply :)

On mobile phone had a few typos.

What would you suggest? will changing colors help out, e.g. will it better to use white background+black text here?
Also what can you say about the text, is it also crappy?

Give me a minute to look over the text, but the layout needs colors easier to the eye. Something that won't make you or I strain the eyes.

EDIT: Make the text flow a little more. ;-)


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Why does it look like from 90's ? Drop it entirely and google free landing page templates or wordpress templates, there are tons of much better and free stuff on the internetz.
 
Why does it look like from 90's ? Drop it entirely and google free landing page templates or wordpress templates, there are tons of much better and free stuff on the internetz.

Great suggestion, I was just going to say that if the colors chosen were bad.

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Why does it look like from 90's ? Drop it entirely and google free landing page templates or wordpress templates, there are tons of much better and free stuff on the internetz.

I always get such reply about 90s about my websites/LPs.
My big problem is that I really like this one and in fact don't get why others find the colors bad, I know that I'm not representative here and I have to choose the design which my visitors, not me, will like. I'll try to find something.
EDIT: Make the text flow a little more. ;-)
Sorry but I didn't get what should I do here, what it means :(
 
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Sorry but I didn't get what should I do here, what it means :(

Maybe use a little transition words and use various types of sentences. (declarative, exclaimtory, interogitve, impartive)

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Ok I'll work on the text later.
So even if I change the colors to black text on white and remove yellow backgrounds it still will suck?
Also note that it's a PPV landing so I'm sure it isn't good at all to put lots of graphics because it will slow down the page.
 
Sign up on a PTC site and have a look around for some ideas. The worse that could happen is that you make a few pennies while doing your research.
 
http://www.blackhatworld.com/blackhat-seo/attachment.php?attachmentid=13046&d=1339510751​

So here is my new "work", I've just copied the LP I found in google with few editions.
Please comment it, is it better then the first?
 

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second one looks much better. But i wonder why the quality of the screenshot is so low. it looks like you use a 1024x768 desktop with windows 95? :p
 

So here is my new "work", I've just copied the LP I found in google with few editions.
Please comment it, is it better then the first?

Much better than the first

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