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Need quick humanly advice.

Discussion in 'BlackHat Lounge' started by swon, Jun 29, 2017.

  1. swon

    swon Junior Member

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    Hey, I need some quick humanly advice. not IM related.

    There's this late 90's model Ford F150 pickup truck in my neighborhood with a man and a woman, and what looks to be a 4-5 year old girl living in it. This truck has been parked on different streets the last few weeks. It had a camper on its bed the other day but looks like it's disappeared now, maybe they sold it. Pretty positive they are homeless.

    Should I call the cops so they can check on them?
    I'm just worried that if they are really homeless then social services might take the kid. That might be for the best, but still, it would break my heart.

    Sorry to be asking this here, I just really don't know what to do here.

    EDIT: I'm in the US.
     
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    Last edited: Jun 29, 2017
  2. manolo12399

    manolo12399 Senior Member

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    well if you call the cops, good changes they will take the kid away, if you are in US.

    Try to talk with them, would be my first action....
     
  3. swon

    swon Junior Member

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    Not to be prejudice, but the man and woman look like "trailer park people". White, early to mid 30's both. Trashy-ish.
     
  4. jazzc

    jazzc Moderator Staff Member Moderator Jr. VIP

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    If it's true that in the US they steal the kid away from the parents if they don't have a permanent home, what part exactly of that option sounds humane to you?
     
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  5. proxygo

    proxygo Jr. VIP Jr. VIP

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    take them over some sandwiches and hot coffee . be my first thing if
    theres a kid there, shit like that shouldnt have to ask.
    called a good deed


    decide anything after .
     
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  6. Zwielicht

    Zwielicht Moderator Staff Member Moderator Jr. VIP

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    If they're homeless, you can't expect them to look nice.

    When I was born, my parents and I were homeless and living in a car briefly. Some clown could've easily said, "Well, there's a baby with that black gangster and that Mexican woman living in car, I should probably call the cops on them", to justify their decision. Luckily, my parents scraped together enough money and got an apartment a week later (and then a house later on). @proxygo's suggestion is much better: take them some food and talk with them a bit first.
     
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    Last edited: Jun 29, 2017
  7. proxygo

    proxygo Jr. VIP Jr. VIP

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    back in 1990 in my young 20s i was homeless 2 years living in a shed, truth
    27 years later, been married 16 years, dont even get that long for murder lol.
    funny how life turns round when u least expect it and u take everything as
    a plus when at 1 point u had nothing. when u come from nothing u respect
    the little things more. and an act of kindness goes a long way.
    to many people today walk by and dont care.
     
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  8. umerjutt00

    umerjutt00 Jr. VIP Jr. VIP

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    No don't do this.. No matter in what condition they are living with, at least the kid is still with the parents.

    Don't steal the kid from parents.
     
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  9. swon

    swon Junior Member

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    I've seen neighbors try to engage in conversation with them twice before. Both times the man's answers were short and vulgar, and he jumped into his truck and drove off aggressively. And the woman always sits there fiddling something in her hands looking like she's day dreaming.

    I'm not an asshole who would just sit back and offer nothing, but I've seen his attitude before.

    The vehicle has no license plates front or back, blows blue smoke when running.
    Notice all the junk, kids bicycle, boxes and stuff in the bed.
    Woman and kid in the car, I walked around the neighborhood trying to find the dad but didn't see him anywhere.

    1.jpg 3.jpg
     
  10. jazzc

    jazzc Moderator Staff Member Moderator Jr. VIP

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    And? What does all that mean to you? That there's a need for a bad Samaritan who will separate the kid from its parents?

    Suppose it's you who is there dirt poor with a wife and a kid. Where else would you put the stuff? Why would an abusive parent keep the bike?

    It feels like you're on the fence about calling the cops and you're looking for moral support because you know you're going to do something bad. As you see, you're not going to get much of that from here and very rightfully so. I heartedly suggest you go back to making money and leave them be since you're not going to bother giving the kid any sandwich.
     
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  11. swon

    swon Junior Member

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    People are so quick to judge me without even understanding thoroughly and not even knowing what kind of neighborhood or what state I live in.

    I'm not a US citizen, so I'm not familiar with the laws regarding such situations in this country.
    Because back home in my country they would take the mother WITH the child to a safer place. I wasn't sure if it's the same here or they only take the child - and I wouldn't want them to take only the child. Google says it depends on the state. I only asked to see what others would do in this situation. I'm not for separating a child from its mother in any situation.
     
  12. Elin Dotsya

    Elin Dotsya Junior Member

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    I'm afraid there's no adequate response I could give that would follow the "no politics" rule. I'm tempted to say it. Anyway, some people can't be helped or will keep refusing it. Reminds me of those 12 yo kids who live nearby. They always beg for money from people even though their parents are lazy assholes who don't want to do anything to change their situation. I hope I'm wrong about this, but the dad sounds like a pos.

    I sometimes wonder what life would have been like if my dad patented some of his inventions instead of working crappy jobs. You know those Dyson Hand Drying machines at airport restrooms? It was one of my dad's ideas before it was on the map. He used to talk about a Segway-esque transporter several years before it was invented.

    It's a shame. That's the reality for people who doubt and don't take action early on. The world is filled with doers and those who make excuses for why they aren't.

    *Sigh* Back to the grind.
     
  13. decoder.co

    decoder.co Registered Member

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    poor kid ... dk your financial situation, but you can offer them a meal or something for sure ..
     
  14. swon

    swon Junior Member

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    I just bought a bunch of McDonalds, nuggets, bottles of water. small bottled milk, kids and adults "one a day" type of vitamins, paper towels, wet wipes, hand sanitizer.

    The man wasn't there, so I talked to the woman, she says they have been evicted from their trailer park and are struggling to find a job because one of them needs to stay behind and watch the kid and also the truck is not drivable on the public road without being pulled over. (I asked her how old the girl was, she ignored my question ???).

    She said they have been on the streets for about 2 months now, and admitted that they were evicted because of their drug use, but she claims she has been completely sober since the day they have been on the streets. She seems sober to me, her speech is fine and she is able to calmly answer my questions, doesn't seem like her brain is zapped and doesn't seem like she's floating on pills. I don't know if the guy has been sober or not.

    They have been living in this neighborhood streets because the guy has a cousin who lives here, and occasionally lets them take a shower and lets them sleep inside during rainy nights because the truck has a broken window.

    The little girl seems fine and looks like any other kid, I'm not a doctor but I hope she's healthy. She did say she was really bored though.

    I want to buy the kid a toy or something, I don't have kids and I don't have much experience with kids. Can someone advise me what I can get her? I assume she is 5 years old. It can't be a plush toy or something similar since she will get bored with it really easily. Please also advise on where to buy the item you suggest.
     
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  15. ScribScribScrib

    ScribScribScrib Jr. VIP Jr. VIP

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    I wouldn't fuck around with them after this, especially no gifts to the kid.
    Like I don't know what kind of background you guys are from but back when I was living in Germany my mother helped a homeless women and her child by buying them some food.
    They talked and exchanged numbers.
    We really felt bad for them and it was just such a wonderful feeling to help them out.

    So we get home and after about twenty minutes there is a knock on the door;
    Io and behold, it was them, they had followed us back to our home.

    We felt super weirded out but my mother, being the nice person that she is invited them in.
    Ten more minutes passed and I noticed how the lady would always type on the phone while talking to my mother.
    She was also fidgeting a lot which was strange for the occasion.

    Ten minutes pass and I start feeling real uneasy, like literal shivers all over my body.

    As my whole body is about to burst from all the anxious energy built up inside of me, a man in his thirties with a fucking pistol comes in and starts demanding money.

    The lady and her daughter stand up and join him, positioning themselves slightly behind him.

    My mom gave him 20DM (Deutsche Mark) and they left.
    We called the cops but they couldn’t do anything.

    I was afraid to sleep for the whole year after this had happened and I oftentimes feel restless among homeless people.
     
    Last edited: Jun 29, 2017
  16. swon

    swon Junior Member

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    Yeah I remember living in Czech Republic, it was hard to distinguish between gypsy and homeless. But things are different in America, just gotta be careful with the drugies, you never know their state of mind.
     
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  17. ScribScribScrib

    ScribScribScrib Jr. VIP Jr. VIP

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    Im more concerned about the father and they said they had a history of drug abuse so just stay on alert.
    Especially if you are alone.
     
  18. Sophie

    Sophie Elite Member Premium Member

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    If I'm there I would try to talk to them first... and maybe be the girl's guardian - ensuring she goes to school (and don't even mind paying), and so on. To put it simply I would treat her like my daughter but I won't separate her with her parents.

    If the father is aggressive, then you can always talk to the mother instead. Perhaps for the start offer her some sandwiches and coffee... or even a small amount of cash... till they are comfortable to open a conversation. Maybe ask if they are on welfare support? Need opportunities to get a job?

    You need to understand they are humans too and, like us, have egos (I'm not saying they're being egoistic, but put ourselves in their shoes). Unless if the dad is a drug-addict or alcoholic... then yikes.

    Thank you, kind samaritan! Well, you can get her a doll... Elsa doll always work, though pricey. lol

    Again, thank you for your kindness, kind soul! You've earned good karma. Bless you :)
     
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    Last edited: Jun 29, 2017
  19. blogzandstuff

    blogzandstuff Elite Member

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    Do you have a church nearby, I'd speak to the vicar in confidence and ask them to approach, they're like doctors with confidence, they don't break it.
     
  20. swon

    swon Junior Member

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    I'm in Utah. And in Utah, the Mormon Church is very active in helping people regardless of religion.

    I still have a few unanswered questions about them, seems like they are holding back something. In Utah, someone who REALLY wants help can always find help through the Mormon Church or from one of the many other organizations supported by the church. (I'm not Mormon, but they did help me a few years back with my rent. It was about 1200$, no questions asked they wrote me a check and asked me to return the receipt). I'm just wondering why they haven't seen a bishop at one of the churches. I might ask them about this tomorrow, and offer to take them to see a bishop.