I have the song of the Editors on the background; Well Worn Hand (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_z4_u8tRkcM) and i'm pretty drunk right now. My internet business is going well, but i'm so unhappy. I only think about money, power and money again. I don't want to be this person. I only think that i can be happy with money and that when i lose all my money i would be nothing. I feel myself better than people who are in a lower position than i am, and i don't want to be this person. Still it seems for me like this is the only person i can be. It's who i am. It's from the family i'm from. It's my destiny. I want to have a nice girlfriend but i only attrack golddiggers. Maybe i should get out for a year or so, to discover other continents and learn from other people. But i can't do that because of my family. My grandmother and father are very old, and i want to be there for them. The only thing about is money and my social status. I'm so afraid for the moment to come when i fail. Is this what i've become? Some person who only thinks about money. Only thinks about himself? I hope not. Sorry for this post, but i had to get this of my stomach.