I'm anxious

kellyzhuang said:

I am 26 years old and all my friends around me are married

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kellyzhuang said:

My relatives and neighbors around me think that if you are over 30, you can't find a good partner

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• For your job, and your future in-general, it sounds like you are either afraid of losing it, or afraid it's not earning enough, or going anywhere, or afraid it's not what you are supposed to be doing with your life.
  If you don't feel good about it, you should make a plan to build something else that you can feel good about.
• For marriage, I'm 32yrs old, and I tried to get married a few years ago, but it was to the wrong person, which caused more grief, so don't get caught-up in thinking it's about settling down.
  If you feel compelled to find a companion, then that's an earnest desire, but it's not something you can force.
  In order to find someone, like that, it's just like a marketing activity... you have to put yourself in front of the right kind of traffic, with the right kind of people that you want to connect with.
  Try going places, and joining groups, where you meet new people with similar interests.
  The person you find will not make things more complicated, but instead they should make things easier and more bearable, and be a force of encouragement in your life.
• If you don't like to work, and are lazy, as you put it, I think that just lends to this theme you've described of being discouraged about various things in your life.
  You are clearly unhappy with certain things in your circumstance, but just remember that circumstances change all the time, and so your mood about things should not be so easily broken.
  It's good to be prepared for the worst, but you can't just spend all your time mourning over bad things that haven't happened, yet. (LoL)
  In life, we will suffer loss, and only a fool has no regrets, but despite all that, we should pursue wholesome goals each day, and if we make an effort to do that, we will achieve the things we set ourselves to do.

Deadlight said:

Get financially successful, use your anxiety as fuel.

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1. Fitness or sports doing more often
2. Do something you really enjoy as a career to make you moved or confident
3. get a ferret could motivate
4. Maybe a coach could make you feel more into work or life itself
5. Do Yoga

getivan said:

Anxiety is a very modern term, so let's avoid that.
What you're really talking about is Fear; and fear leads to discouragement, and discouragement leads to self-defeat.
If you don't want to be afraid of something, then you either have to deal with whatever it is, or altogether avoid it.
There are some things that fear is trying to help us battle against, and some things where fear is saying we can't contend with those things at-all, so we should get away from those things.
View attachment 203425View attachment 203427

• For your job, and your future in-general, it sounds like you are either afraid of losing it, or afraid it's not earning enough, or going anywhere, or afraid it's not what you are supposed to be doing with your life.
  If you don't feel good about it, you should make a plan to build something else that you can feel good about.
• For marriage, I'm 32yrs old, and I tried to get married a few years ago, but it was to the wrong person, which caused more grief, so don't get caught-up in thinking it's about settling down.
  If you feel compelled to find a companion, then that's an earnest desire, but it's not something you can force.
  In order to find someone, like that, it's just like a marketing activity... you have to put yourself in front of the right kind of traffic, with the right kind of people that you want to connect with.
  Try going places, and joining groups, where you meet new people with similar interests.
  The person you find will not make things more complicated, but instead they should make things easier and more bearable, and be a force of encouragement in your life.
• If you don't like to work, and are lazy, as you put it, I think that just lends to this theme you've described of being discouraged about various things in your life.
  You are clearly unhappy with certain things in your circumstance, but just remember that circumstances change all the time, and so your mood about things should not be so easily broken.
  It's good to be prepared for the worst, but you can't just spend all your time mourning over bad things that haven't happened, yet. (LoL)
  In life, we will suffer loss, and only a fool has no regrets, but despite all that, we should pursue wholesome goals each day, and if we make an effort to do that, we will achieve the things we set ourselves to do.

View attachment 203426
So, I would encourage you to set some practical goals in the areas where you are suffering from fear and discouragement and a spirit of self-defeat.
Your circumstances can, and will, change for the better, if you set practical daily goals.
Set goals for a job you can enjoy.
Set goals to meet new people, with similar interests.
Set goals to work on things you believe have value.
Set goals for things rooted in Truth, and you will have liberty from fear and doubt and discouragement and self-defeat.
View attachment 203429
May you find good work and companionship and unbridled joy,
Ivan
-

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Zwielicht said:

I'm sorry to hear that, I have issues with anxiety as well. Although, if you're looking for mental health advice or even a discussion on mental health, Black Hat World really isn't the place.

There are plenty of online options available now for you to get help with your anxiety. I can't recommend any to you, but try searching for online-based therapists.

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Raj Kesu said:

Never compare yourself with anyone else. Each person in the world has some unique set of circumstances.

Do not bother about what anyone thinks. Do not define yourself based on wh

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Raj Kesu said:

Never compare yourself with anyone else. Each person in the world has some unique set of circumstances.

Do not bother about what anyone thinks. Do not define yourself based on what anyone else feels or thinks about you.

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getivan said:

Anxiety is a very modern term, so let's avoid that.
What you're really talking about is Fear; and fear leads to discouragement, and discouragement leads to self-defeat.
If you don't want to be afraid of something, then you either have to deal with whatever it is, or altogether avoid it.
There are some things that fear is trying to help us battle against, and some things where fear is saying we can't contend with those things at-all, so we should get away from those things.
View attachment 203425View attachment 203427

• For your job, and your future in-general, it sounds like you are either afraid of losing it, or afraid it's not earning enough, or going anywhere, or afraid it's not what you are supposed to be doing with your life.
  If you don't feel good about it, you should make a plan to build something else that you can feel good about.
• For marriage, I'm 32yrs old, and I tried to get married a few years ago, but it was to the wrong person, which caused more grief, so don't get caught-up in thinking it's about settling down.
  If you feel compelled to find a companion, then that's an earnest desire, but it's not something you can force.
  In order to find someone, like that, it's just like a marketing activity... you have to put yourself in front of the right kind of traffic, with the right kind of people that you want to connect with.
  Try going places, and joining groups, where you meet new people with similar interests.
  The person you find will not make things more complicated, but instead they should make things easier and more bearable, and be a force of encouragement in your life.
• If you don't like to work, and are lazy, as you put it, I think that just lends to this theme you've described of being discouraged about various things in your life.
  You are clearly unhappy with certain things in your circumstance, but just remember that circumstances change all the time, and so your mood about things should not be so easily broken.
  It's good to be prepared for the worst, but you can't just spend all your time mourning over bad things that haven't happened, yet. (LoL)
  In life, we will suffer loss, and only a fool has no regrets, but despite all that, we should pursue wholesome goals each day, and if we make an effort to do that, we will achieve the things we set ourselves to do.

View attachment 203426
So, I would encourage you to set some practical goals in the areas where you are suffering from fear and discouragement and a spirit of self-defeat.
Your circumstances can, and will, change for the better, if you set practical daily goals.
Set goals for a job you can enjoy.
Set goals to meet new people, with similar interests.
Set goals to work on things you believe have value.
Set goals for things rooted in Truth, and you will have liberty from fear and doubt and discouragement and self-defeat.
View attachment 203429
May you find good work and companionship and unbridled joy,
Ivan
-

Click to expand...

polecat said:

Each person is different but many people routes could work for you such as

1. Fitness or sports doing more often
2. Do something you really enjoy as a career to make you moved or confident
3. get a ferret could motivate
4. Maybe a coach could make you feel more into work or life itself
5. Do Yoga

Right food or drinks can work well such as I feel amazing eating 100% pure coco or coconut milk or Indian food any kind more less or Wheatgrass I found good as well.
Get a soup machine if you don't have one I find putting a load of vegetables in it makes me feel great such as carrots or potatoes. You can add marmite if you want to give it more flavour


You can get married any age more less to be fair as well.

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CreativeDaddy said:

I've done that, being really successful but some things never change.
我做到了，非常成功，但是有些事情永远不会改变。

On one side, yes being successful will fix a lot of things and for some people work, on "soft anxiety cases".
一方面，是的，成功可以解决很多问题，对于一些人来说，可以解决“软焦虑症”。

For me personally, I've a real problem with anxiety in a mix between "It's never good enough" and worrying to much about things you know.
就我个人而言，我确实有焦虑的问题，一方面是“它永远都不够好”，另一方面是担心自己知道的事情。
Everything I do, I feel that it's never good enough and we start overthinking about it and get worse when emotional problems join all that.
我做的每一件事，我都觉得它永远不够好，我们开始过度思考它，当情绪问题加在一起时，情况变得更糟。

Really thinking about getting professional help because it's being to much, maybe op should do the same.
真正考虑寻求专业的帮助，因为这意味着很多，也许 op 也应该这样做。

Everyone who needs to talk, feel free to send me a message, you should not be alone on this, no one should.
每个需要倾诉的人，请随时给我发信息，你不应该是孤独的，谁也不应该。

my 2 cents.
我的两分钱。

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davids355 said:

My advise is to take up some form of fitness - whether it’s going to the gym or learning a martial art. It will improve your confidence and hopefully reduce your anxiety. That’s just my personal advice.
我的建议是进行某种形式的健身——无论是去健身房还是学习武术。它会提高你的自信，并有望减少你的焦虑。这只是我个人的建议。

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davids355 said:

My advise is to take up some form of fitness - whether it’s going to the gym or learning a martial art. It will improve your confidence and hopefully reduce your anxiety. That’s just my personal advice.
我的建议是进行某种形式的健身——无论是去健身房还是学习武术。它会提高你的自信，并有望减少你的焦虑。这只是我个人的建议。

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Panther28 said:

You are maybe anxious because of a lack of direction, goals, and results based on those. If you had great feedback from a method next week, you would be cracking out the champers!
你可能因为缺乏方向、目标和基于这些的结果而感到焦虑。如果下周你从一个方法中得到了很好的反馈，那么你将会成为冠军！

You should enjoy doing the things that are suggested on this forum, and the topics that people are working on, you should be scooping up a few at least to work on too.
你应该享受做这个论坛上建议的事情，以及人们正在研究的话题，你至少也应该挖掘一些来研究。

Work on those things only once you've refreshed yourself with a good hotel break somewhere, and restaurant food for a couple of days! You deserve it
只有当你在某个地方度过了一个愉快的旅馆假期，并且在餐馆吃了几天饭后，你才可以开始做这些事情！这是你应得的

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