StraussCan
Regular Member
- Aug 24, 2013
- 393
- 130
Dear Webmaster,
I have been reading your site for 3 and a half minutes ? not a millisecond
longer than it took to find your contact details.
I really love that post you wrote about The Rise of the Content Marketing
Moron. I hate those guys too. Your readers must be so lucky to have you.
Moving on, quickly, I would be honored, flattered, humbled, punch-drunk
and frankly much less annoying if you would just let me submit an article for
your site.
The article will be original, unique and exclusive to your blog
**Terms, conditions and Elance may apply.
In exchange for this monumental tour de force of literature, I have only a
small request: two relevant links in the article body. Of course, by relevant, I
mean relevant to anybody seeking a ?real estate expert? in Sacramento. But fuck
that, right?
Any content is good content! LOL!
This article may or may not read like a $5 mess with a single valid point per
2500 words. That?s assuming I wrote more than 400. And I probably didn?t.
Bonus: Hey, if you really want to shag your artistic integrity, I?ve also
attached a press release. It?s about my product going live on Clickbank 7 months ago. I?m sure your readers will just love it.
Finally, just so that you can be left in no doubt that I am ? indeed ? a
colossal bag of dicks, here are some links to articles I?ve already written.
Please don?t be turned off by the strange topics. My last client was a wooden
antique wholesaler.
Oh, and do let me know once the post has gone live so I can cross your name
off my spreadsheet of mortals to pester.
Respectfully,
(Because we both know I don?t give a shit,)
Naomi Bigtits
I have been reading your site for 3 and a half minutes ? not a millisecond
longer than it took to find your contact details.
I really love that post you wrote about The Rise of the Content Marketing
Moron. I hate those guys too. Your readers must be so lucky to have you.
Moving on, quickly, I would be honored, flattered, humbled, punch-drunk
and frankly much less annoying if you would just let me submit an article for
your site.
The article will be original, unique and exclusive to your blog
**Terms, conditions and Elance may apply.
In exchange for this monumental tour de force of literature, I have only a
small request: two relevant links in the article body. Of course, by relevant, I
mean relevant to anybody seeking a ?real estate expert? in Sacramento. But fuck
that, right?
Any content is good content! LOL!
This article may or may not read like a $5 mess with a single valid point per
2500 words. That?s assuming I wrote more than 400. And I probably didn?t.
Bonus: Hey, if you really want to shag your artistic integrity, I?ve also
attached a press release. It?s about my product going live on Clickbank 7 months ago. I?m sure your readers will just love it.
Finally, just so that you can be left in no doubt that I am ? indeed ? a
colossal bag of dicks, here are some links to articles I?ve already written.
Please don?t be turned off by the strange topics. My last client was a wooden
antique wholesaler.
Oh, and do let me know once the post has gone live so I can cross your name
off my spreadsheet of mortals to pester.
Respectfully,
(Because we both know I don?t give a shit,)
Naomi Bigtits
