Drug Test Monday... How Do I Pass?

Alright so I have a drug test Monday for a government job and its just a pee test but I am worried because the last time I smoked was early this morning. Most things I have read said that there is no way to clean the THC out of your system and you should drink a bunch of water before the test but I am worried I may dilute my urine too much for testing. Anyone passed a test within a couple days of smoking and if so how?

found this on yahoo answers
#1. Drink lots of cranberry juice and water
#2. Eat nothing but low fat foods from now until then. A diet of nothing but fruits and vegetables is best.
#3. THC stays in your fat cells, so sweating and exercise helps. Take lots of long hot baths and buy some Epsom salt and put it in the bath tub.

and this

Drinking lots of water in a short amount of time will only dilute your urine. I don't think that vinegar would be that great to drink, unless you like drinking vinegar. Drinking lots of water, cranberry juice, sugarless iced tea and the like will make it so your pee is clear and hopefully you have diluted the thc metabolite enough so the test will not detect it. THC is absorbed into your fat and slowly excreted by your body. Tests for THC detect a metabolite in your system. If you get high a lot then you have a lot of it in you. Therefor, you would have to dilute your pee more than someone who only smokes occasionally. If you can get away with it, the best way to pass a urine test is to bring in someone elses clean pee and put that in a cup. You'd have to figure out a way to keep it warm because they do test your urine's temperature. Products that claim will allow you to pass a drug test are usually phony. They're simply a liquid that goes through your system fast and dilutes your urine. It's probably healthier to just downsome liquids and go meet your fate.

The THC will stay in your system up to 90 days. Don't take niacin. It will flush the drugs out faster but too much niacin can test dirty. Best way is go to your local smoke shop and look for fake pee. It costs like $40 or something. Strap it to your leg and use it. Most likely they won't stand over you watching.

just drink a lot of water and do sports,so you sweat a lot.

You can also tell them you ate poppy seeds, and it known to be able to fail drug tests
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FMqQLgw7Uz4

Simple answer: don't do drugs. Yeah, I have no room to talk but Im not looking for a job.

Now for the real answer...go to the smoke shop and ask. My fiancee and a friend both bought this drink stuff. Makes your pee turn funny colors. They had to drink like a gallon of water to clear their system completely and they both passed and they both smoked the day before they had to take there tests. Bottle of the stuff was like $40-45 bucks. Dude at the shop said it's what all the air force people use when they have their weekend passes.

easy,

just call them up

say something important came up

reschedule to a later day

Just drink a lot of water and milk and hot drinks you will be fine, one think though you now what if get the job you wont smoke for all your life? That sucks mate!

Like GeetFaux said you will need somebody else's piss for this. There is no way to clean your system in that short space of time

Geetfaux said:

Get a friend to pee into a condom, tie it up, keep it in your underwear and pour it in..tried & tested many times.

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haha, great idea provided he can find someone with clean piss.

no sometimes they watch you at least for guys. Like they'll take you to a urinal and stand a bit behind you (so they'll notice you doing it). Also it has to be a guy around the same age and set as you ..they can tell both body type, age, ethnicity and even health from the sample.

The water trick works, my friend did it and he just drank lots of water talking about a litres of water over about 2 days. Just drink water all day long and piss it out. The day of the exam (morning) eat something with a high water content like soup, etc. That will help out while also ensuring your sample doesn't appear too diluted.

Probably too late but; I was detailed for two weeks to be a "Monitor" for this test while in the Air Force. We are told to observe the member (no pun intended) with full observation of the flow. The bottle must be seen at all times.
I am not sure what % actually is tested but I know it is not 100%. As a new hire it may be 100%. If you manage to pass I suggest you stop with the THC, because they will have random no notice test. With contractors they will go to your deask and compell a sample.
The people who could not provide a sample were sent to the base hospital for retrieval via cathoder. (Ouch)
On a side note: Officers had more of a problem with stage fright than enlisted.

First off, a Government job on drugs, that figures.. Secondly what if this person is writing a new manual for the Dept. Of Corrections that in includes how to spot different ways people cheat on urine tests, and you all just help ? This is supposed to be a Black Hat SEO forum WTF???

keverone said:

First off, a Government job on drugs, that figures.. Secondly what if this person is writing a new manual for the Dept. Of Corrections that in includes how to spot different ways people cheat on urine tests, and you all just help ? This is supposed to be a Black Hat SEO forum WTF???

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i like your paranoid thinking...

StationMate said:

no sometimes they watch you at least for guys. Like they'll take you to a urinal and stand a bit behind you (so they'll notice you doing it). Also it has to be a guy around the same age and set as you ..they can tell both body type, age, ethnicity and even health from the sample.

The water trick works, my friend did it and he just drank lots of water talking about a litres of water over about 2 days. Just drink water all day long and piss it out. The day of the exam (morning) eat something with a high water content like soup, etc. That will help out while also ensuring your sample doesn't appear too diluted.

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Can they find out that I wank off 15 times a week, too?

There's not a whole lot you can do, especially if the testing is more than just a piss test. If they take a hair or blood sample, you're f*cked. Using someone else's urine doesn't work every time either as some facilities check the temperature of the urine immediately to make sure its ''fresh'' lol

I'm glad my country doesn't allow employers to perform drug testing

mmm....Dont due drugs ?

darkAsPitch said:

What a world we live in...

"Can somebody give me their urine, please? I need to apply for a job..."

B.S.

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So true... If you knew you were having the test, the thing to have done was well, not do drugs... I mean really, have some responsibility....

Well, I have passed all my drug tests, but well, then again... I don't do drugs... Well, not often and not the kinds that are that common....

My other half does, but WTF??? We are freaking self employed... Who's going to drug test us? Ourselves... At least I know what he does, and he knows well, what I don't do... LMAO..

If someone I knew needed some clean stuff, well, I would charge, and i have..... LMAO.. Its nasty and I don't like doing it, so I may as well be paid for their irresponsibility...

But as for the comments about government jobs and drugs..... Does it surprise you??? Really, it shouldn't.. I mean look what some of our legislatures are trying to pass and some that have... They must have been smoking something to get that done huh??? As well as some of the crap that isn't done as well as not updating their systems to be with the times.... I have a relative working with the VA here in Texas as a accountant and its like WTF?? Outdated systems abound... I am sure there are so many ways to scam the system its not even funny... If you were retired from the army.... LMAO