Black Hat Cured my Panic & Anxiety Attacks

It seems blackhat is suited for those with disorders of this sort. For a while, I was pretty agoraphobic, as I had warrants out for my arrest for around 3 years. Going outside was risking my freedom!
Recently, I got all of that taken care of (without jail time!) and I'm surprised how much it helped my anxiety to be able to go out for a drive and know that if I get pulled over, I might not necessarily go to jail.

Unfortunately, I still have some problems when it comes to socializing, and like HaRRo said, I've gotten some pretty weird mannerisms like holding my hand on the back of my neck, as well as trouble looking people in the eye. (And when I try to force myself to look someone in the eyes, I usually give them this crazy 'i'm-gonna-attack-you' staredown.)

I resisted the idea that money would solve my problems, but even the anxiety problems stem from low confidence, and low confidence stems from being a brokeass. Ohh, blessed BHW!

One thing i never get attacks when im out clubbing or drinking, but the morning after DAMN.
Death or what lol

Hmmm, I got SPD, quite different from the average panic attack.. Thank god for le*xapro and xanax ..


That's odd harro, usually it would be the other way around for me.. Guess maybe you just feel calm at the club, while drinking of course ?

Marketing the really the best bed buddy for anxiety/pd.. Don't really have much to worry about once you get the hang of it.

Thats wassup I suffer from Anxiety Disorder too..WHen i came here i was Comforted with the idea that i could make money online..but its good to know theres other Sufferers here as well

Hi Guys,

I have had panic and anxiety attacks for some ten years now. They began when i was sitting on trains or walking though the London underground and graduated to planes, sitting in board meetings, presenting on stage, in my car in traffic, being in a heated environments, in shops, in enclosed spaces.

I used to work sometimes overseas and i found myself uncomfortable with that, so i just worked away from home in this country and then i found that i didn't like to be too far from home so started working in London, until my problems stopped me doing that and then i took local work and then i found i couldn't sustain that - so i ended up shut away in my bedroom. I used to be a CEO of Internet companies, but ended up completely destroyed.

So the enemy is all around me it seems, but i am safe now.
My anxiety gives me delusions and cognitive distortions which means it is hard to concentrate and get focused and as someone said above their is the low self-esteem and confidence.

So having a family you can see why someone like me would turn to black hat and not white hat.

When your mental processes get so shutdown you don't have any time for playing games too straight. You are already on the back foot. Already disadvantaged. Already cornered like an animal.

So i have to make money any way i can.

The worst they can do to me is lock me in another safe place.

You know more than most andax. You realize that depression can grab any of us at any time. Most people don't realize that. What they call depression - is really only like having a headache and sleeping it off. But clinical depression is like the devil holding you in its embrace. It is there all the time and there is nothing you can do to get rid of it. So you stop being chased by it and just sit down and sufferer it. Wait for it to finish playing its silly games.

Worst part is! You never actually did a deal with the devil.

So why feel this way?

I think the darkness has lead me to the point of reality. That a man must stand on his own two feet, be humble and gracious for life and perhaps make some money in the meantime. Its early days for me, but i aim to be the best black hat marketer in the area i live in in England!

Keep it real!

Rudy

andax said:

This is exactly how I was feeling/thinking for about the last 4 years. Clinical depression started 4 years ago, after my well organized nice world fel into pieces in a weeks time. In that state of mind I really didn't care about anything I was just living day to day, making serious blackhat money. I didn't even take the time to keep myself secure, the income was easily tracked backed to me. However I didn't care because I had everything I wanted. Maybe that's not much for most of you here, but some computers, a nice car and a quiet place to sleep was all I needed. Then panic attacks started to haunt me. At first I didn't even know what that was, I was sure I'm going crazy or something. Then the docs told me about it. So I just took the pills and went on with my 'i dont give a f because nothing matters anymore' lifestyle not paying attention to the simple fact that it's not really me... i was just trying to compensate for the losses I had back then.
Then I took a break to give myself time to think what i'm doing wrong that I can never be happy, and what does fear want from me.

And now I'm back. I'll give it a shot again and see what happens

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me too guys. crazy huh. an overactive imagination at 18 has held me in check for the past 13 years. i've realized it's not going to go away. you have to learn how to control your thoughts. medicine may help to if you have a doctor that is concerned enough to understand what is going on. working by myself and being able to smoke weed has improved my quality of life immeasurably.