You probably don't. Variety in a relationship is nice. She can teach you about new things, things that aren't your strength and can help grow you as a person. You can do the same; variety is good and healthy.
BHW ladies club :
- Thread starter Khakhat
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weruncompanies
Power Member
- Feb 15, 2011
- 605
- 287
This isn't the kitchen... Or is it?
If a male IMer put "IM Guy" in his user title, no one would give a damn. Would you prefer that she'd put a more neutral title, such as "SEO Person" or "SEO Individual"?
While I don't think that gender has anything to do with success online, it's true that there are fewer women in IM and in IT in general. This is slowly changing but I think it's like anything, awareness is the key to acceptance. If more women were recognised as being a substantial force in the IM world, there would be less need for threads (and responses) of this kind.
I'm a girl. So what? I'm not going to hide my gender in order to avoid being disrespected. That seems like feeding sexism to me.
Like most others on this forum, I'm going to judge people based on their intelligence and their achievements, not whether or not someone's a boy, a girl or a crocodile. If you're a crocodile however, I don't see any reason why you shouldn't let it be known that crocodiles too, are interested in IM and as such, help remove the stigma that surrounds crocodiles in the workplace everywhere.
I both agree and disagree.
For minorities, it is important to draw awareness to the existence of the minority, that is true. On the other hand, that comes with some heavy downsides. By drawing attention to it, you basically lower the expectations out of the minority. By drawing attention to the gender of females, you are basically saying that that is what defines females. As you said, males wouldn't get much recognition if they posted "SEO Guy". But instead they have to do something bigger than that; they have to have a service, they have to build a brand, they have to do other things for their title/identity to have recognition.
But females? All they have to do is say "I am a girl" and then they will immediately get recognition. That is weaksauce. You know what that does? It lowers expectations for females, and it lowers female expectations on themselves.
Females already exist in SEO/IM world. We know this. I don't believe that attention-drawing is needed for that purpose anymore. Instead, females just need to reach higher-heights on their own accord. Pointing out they are a female won't make that any better.
You don't have to hide your gender, but notice most guys don't either. I am not suggesting you pretend to be a male. What I am suggesting is you only bring up your gender when relevant. Some people would put "SEO Guy" in their title casually. If you'd put "SEO Girl" casually in your title, then fine. But if you specifically put it in your title to draw attention to the fact you're a female, then you're exhibiting GOTIS.
If it comes up in natural conversation that you mention gender-specific things then sure absolutely. But people already know that females exist in the IM world. Talking about female pretty much does nothing now, except make you look like a typical GOTI and makes you look like you are looking for a free ride and being whiteknighted.
The stigma isn't that girls aren't interested on the whole in IM - that is pure fact. The stigma is that girls don't take it seriously. Well, when you choose to showcase your gender specifically to showcase your gender, then you're pretty much sending the message that thats all you have to showcase, thereby furthering the stigma.
And unfortunately that is a reality on here. Most of these threads of "GIRLS POST HERE" have brand-new accounts with very few posts being like "oh hai I'm a girl lets stick together!!!" just making the stigma even worse.
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Haha
I do not mean to create drama. I am just creating some discussion around it. If people choose to take my analysis as drama, then I'll happily close this thread and never come back.
I agree with almost everything you've said but do have some issues with this as I've never personally experienced it. How would informing someone of their gender give any kind of professional recognition, particularly on a forum such as BHW where reputation and respect seems to be based on skill, achievement and a willingness to help others?
I agree that GOTI syndrome is annoying. I don't feel that I've seen it displayed on BHW though. On WoW and other "online" MMO type games? Sure. Not here and not in places where respect is based on achievement and participation.
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Eagle Eye
Senior Member
- Aug 3, 2010
- 1,122
- 656
Ok.............Sure
D
Deleted member 120847
Guest
The internet is a bit like the 70's when it comes to male atitudes to women.
danizdeman
Regular Member
- Sep 29, 2009
- 237
- 187
I'm not a lady but I'll join
singingsleep
Regular Member
- Dec 13, 2008
- 412
- 390
Name witheld, those I've worked with know it already, winner of the 2009 award for excellence and extended shenanigans in dating promotions and general tomfoolery. I enjoy market research and advertising. I enjoy long romantic midnight walks from the couch to the fridge. Hobbies include making sandwiches and getting pregnant.
partymarty4870
Elite Member
- Jul 7, 2010
- 2,032
- 1,697
I'd like to apologise in advance to all the ladies on here, sometimes I can come accross as a bit of a sexist pig, It's not really my fault though - I'm Australian.
Although no matter how I seem, I do appreciate strong women. My wife is a strong woman, my business partner and my equal.
(and also hot and good in bed - but not worth much in the kitchen, thats my room)
Although no matter how I seem, I do appreciate strong women. My wife is a strong woman, my business partner and my equal.
(and also hot and good in bed - but not worth much in the kitchen, thats my room)
B. Friendly
BANNED
- Jun 10, 2012
- 386
- 482
Nice club you got here. Now one of you girls go make me a sammich.
And bring me a beer, while you're at it.
And bring me a beer, while you're at it.
redrubies
Supreme Member
- Jan 17, 2011
- 1,442
- 2,664
I doubt this thread is going to work out well. They probably fear their inboxes getting filled by horny bhw members.
There's a group for female members btw: http://www.blackhatworld.com/blackhat-seo/groups/gurrl-power.html
I can't access that group.
redrubies
Supreme Member
- Jan 17, 2011
- 1,442
- 2,664
I want recipes. Got anything good?