Would you consider this a greedy, bad person?!

[lincolnave]

Hey SnowBerry,

Seems like everyone here (ESPECIALLY Asif) is spending time "trying" to help you. Some of the help you'll like and other parts you won't.

Asif has gained more of my respect not for the validity of his recommendations (since I don't know squat about what he is recommending or been dealing with) but for his ability to share (pretty humble of him, for you) his experience(s) as he does ALL the TIME, here on BHW!!! Thanks Asif.

Seems like this is frustrating you, to me frustration to me is when "Something happens that I don't either understand or agree with and don't know why the other person did it." For me, once I realize I'm frustrated I'll try to focus on the "other person" part of the feeling of frustration and realize that they can say or do "what ever" they want and THAT has nothing to do with me. So, it seems easier to let that go?

What say you? Just wondering since you seem to be engaged and frustrated.

 

[ChanzGrande]

Seems like this is frustrating you, to me frustration to me is when "Something happens that I don't either understand or agree with and don't know why the other person did it." For me, once I realize I'm frustrated I'll try to focus on the "other person" part of the feeling of frustration and realize that they can say or do "what ever" they want and THAT has nothing to do with me. So, it seems easier to let that go?

What say you? Just wondering since you seem to be engaged and frustrated.

I can't speak for the OP here, but I can definitely relate to these sentiments and just wish that in the moment I could temper my anxiety or frustration when things happen that are beyond my control. Sometimes the external environment appears to be taking over until someone writes something significant such as, "hey dude, it's out there."

Thanks!

 

[robby678]

Imo, what you did is OK. moreoften we are stressful and feel drop because of having debts and not enough money. cheer up,pals.

 

[Zwielicht]

To hell with counseling, been there done that. Each time I was forced into it they treated me like I'm psychotic and in need of drugs. It's very degrading, & just b/c I've also started getting panic attacks I was considered insane. It's all a scam, both counseling and psychiatry. There's nothing they told me that I don't already know about myself

I'm aware of these 'problems' of mine and being OCD, makes me obsess over these things and always wanting every situation to turn out the right way.. it's a pain. I'm not sure how easy it is to overcome these thoughts, if anyone actually managed to
I suppose I can let this thing go and forget it

yes ty for your answers

^ Typical American 'solution' to everything...just take a pill! Ridiculous

& I'm supposed to risk any of the 50+ side effects of those drugs, for the sake of a quick fix? Only a crazy person would still take them knowing shit like suicide/death can happen as a result. Look how many die a year from prescription drugs, but the media is silent about it. Everyone assumes it will never happen to them but...it happens to A LOT!

& all b/c people are lazy and want to take the easy way out of their problems? It's a scam!

Are you telling me I'm crazy?

I had a panic attack a couple of years ago after getting too stressed out, so I know what you're going through. The only time I took any medication for it was as it was happening (2 pills at the same time, that was it), and I've never had a panic attack or taken mental health medication again.

I can also relate to what you said regarding counselling and people treating you like you're insane. After the panic attack, I actually went to see a therapist about it and he was absolutely terrible at this job. You see, he specialised in anxiety, which is something I don't have (I had a stress-induced panic attack; I can't really say I know what it's like being anxious). However, after talking to me for 30 minutes (it was mostly him talking about himself), he came to the conclusion that I most likely had "agoraphobia", which is a type of anxiety where you avoid places that make you anxious. He then suggested that I come in again for a definite diagnosis because I "definitely need medication to manage it".

It was funny because before I left his office, he tried making me do these silly breathing exercises to relieve anxiety because, according to him, I looked anxious when I was in his office. The exercises clearly didn't work because I don't have anxiety, and he got angry because they weren't working, so I walked out of his office.

Now, what I'm going to say is something you most likely won't agree with, but hear me out. I don't like taking pills either because I feel like they're more of a band-aid, but take 1 or 2 pills and see if it helps you at all. If your psychiatrist tries pushing more pills on you, just don't take them. Now, if you really don't want to take pills, try kava tea or doing something to take your mind off of the situation.

 

[vanman5128]

You may want to look into a 12 step program "Underearners Annonymopus", they have phone meetings, and in person meetings. A lot of people have benefited from this program. Sometimes we can see self
sabotaging behavior, and unconscious behavior in others before we can see it in ourselves.
Best wishes.

 

[PHPInjected]

^ Typical American 'solution' to everything...just take a pill! Ridiculous

& I'm supposed to risk any of the 50+ side effects of those drugs, for the sake of a quick fix? Only a crazy person would still take them knowing shit like suicide/death can happen as a result. Look how many die a year from prescription drugs, but the media is silent about it. Everyone assumes it will never happen to them but...it happens to A LOT!

& all b/c people are lazy and want to take the easy way out of their problems? It's a scam!

Are you telling me I'm crazy?

First: Wilson was taking time out of his day to point you in the right direction and you call him a "typical American"? Don't be rude to people who are trying to help you.

Second: Some people need those medications, there is no easy way out of anxiety or depression. There is an easy way out of being a wasteman though, just don't do it.

Third: All I read was excuses. A lot of people don't even have jobs, be grateful, and get help from a professional, not a marketing forum.

Hey SnowBerry,

Seems like everyone here (ESPECIALLY Asif) is spending time "trying" to help you. Some of the help you'll like and other parts you won't.

Asif has gained more of my respect not for the validity of his recommendations (since I don't know squat about what he is recommending or been dealing with) but for his ability to share (pretty humble of him, for you) his experience(s) as he does ALL the TIME, here on BHW!!! Thanks Asif.

I second this. I happened to see a post of Wilson's from back in 2013 today. It was on a post 7878 made about the forum needing new mods and Wilson was already getting recommendations from other members. Well done, mate.

 

[snowberry]

He basically told me I'm mental & to just take drugs and shut up. How does this attitude actually help someone? Makes you feel shittier and like a subhuman

That's exactly what therapists do as well. They inadvertently tell you, in a non verbal way you're beyond help, b/c there is something so wrong with you (you're 'crazy'!) and just to get drugs to be normal again, and then leave them alone. I already felt weird/abnormal enough for years and that just makes it worse. It pisses me off thinking about the last incident with that dumb bimbo I worked with, I'm glad I left her recently
WTF is wrong with society that they just want to force pills on everyone, making up hundreds of 'disorders' to sell more drugs? They can't even properly diagnose anyone (in my experience), esp just asking about your symptoms

& just b/c any one of you are on those pills, why do you need to push it them another stranger on the internet? Is it to justify your own use of them and feel better about being dependent on drugs for the rest of your life? I'm not going down that path, I don't care what propaganda says drugs will miraculously save you. All the pill poppers I've known aren't recovering or doing well, they're still sick! >

got to go now so I cant finish this...

 

[june007]

No unless they are greedy enough to make other suffer.

 

[lincolnave]

Hey SnowBerry,

I get it you don't "like" pills and don't want to take them. When people find or do something they find useful, telling "the world" becomes a passion. That is how the human mind operates, why do you think food stores give free samples? We all know we need to eat to live, BUT when you are eating the "process of eating" takes over and we buy so much more food, just because we ARE enjoying the act of eating and want that experience to last or happen again soon. This is true for most enjoyable human experiences, wanting others to have the experience as well, is something we are driven to do. This is why I suggested the IFS, simply put it worked for me, so it might work for you.

To "get past" the pill discussion, can you discuss the process/method you have used to refocus (working it out)?

To me the ability to "recover" is more important than avoiding an issue. The point for me is, that issues will always find us, having a recovery method that can implemented once something happens (regardless of fault) is really empowering (for me) and what I've seen happen is that the recovery becomes so quick that it helps me "get out" (I.E. know that I made a mistake or someone else made a simple mistake) of a problem before it is a real issue (I.E. I start yelling). One recovery method is being humble and asking for help (like you are doing here) and knowing when help is offered, it may or may not be the type of response you wanted or needed. Accepting any gift, including help (useful or not), can/should be accepted with grace. My point is, when I accept any gift with grace (appreciation and respect), I'm less frustrated and annoyed. BTW trust me I'm NOT a graceful person as often (or for as long) as I'd like to be, but do prefer the process of improving over "being annoyed" (the people around me prefer graceful, also).

Your thoughts?

Past "forgetting about it." Having a strong memory can make "forgetting about it" difficult. What other methods do you have in your tool box?

 

[Wilson Grant Fisk]

He basically told me I'm mental & to just take drugs and shut up. How does this attitude actually help someone? Makes you feel shittier and like a subhuman

That's exactly what therapists do as well. They inadvertently tell you, in a non verbal way you're beyond help, b/c there is something so wrong with you (you're 'crazy'!) and just to get drugs to be normal again, and then leave them alone. I already felt weird/abnormal enough for years and that just makes it worse. It pisses me off thinking about the last incident with that dumb bimbo I worked with, I'm glad I left her recently
WTF is wrong with society that they just want to force pills on everyone, making up hundreds of 'disorders' to sell more drugs? They can't even properly diagnose anyone (in my experience), esp just asking about your symptoms

& just b/c any one of you are on those pills, why do you need to push it them another stranger on the internet? Is it to justify your own use of them and feel better about being dependent on drugs for the rest of your life? I'm not going down that path, I don't care what propaganda says drugs will miraculously save you. All the pill poppers I've known aren't recovering or doing well, they're still sick! >

got to go now so I cant finish this...

Hey, snowberry, it was certainly not my intention to push pills on you. You asked for advice on an Internet Marketing forum and I gave you advice and suggestions based on my own experiences.
Drugs are NOT the total solution, as to recover it requires strength to change thought processes and the way you see yourself and the world.

If your experience with the medical Establishment is poor then it will require work on your part to find a Doctor that you feel comfortable with.

Doctors are like the rest of us they come in all different shapes and sizes and some are better than others. If one Doctor won't listen to your concerns then you need to keep looking until you find one you can work with.

Have you actually tried any Drugs previously or just basing your opinion on what you think rather than what you know? Again there is no one Drug suitable for all symptoms and it actually takes time to find the right prescription for you. When I first tried various anti-depressants it took almost a year to find the right medication and the right dosage as they all work differently and target different areas. During this time I was monitored closely by my Doctor until we found something that worked. Unfortunately during this period I found that some Drugs had no effect and others actually made me feel worse but this is part of the process until you find out what works for you.

Talking Therapies with Psychologists and/or Psychiatrists are also usually offered because some people require it. I found it wasn't that helpful for me but it works for some. Avoid any self-taught therapists with a Diploma from some clown school because these are the ones that are unqualified and offer mumbo jumbo type help.

Anyway, you have rejected Drugs and Therapy, you ask for help on an IM forum when there are other forums and websites that would offer better advice.

Reading your previous threads it is clear you have problems, you won't see any changes in your life until you start to make them.

Since joining BHW you have made 6 threads, 3 of them complaining about your life and highlighting your low self esteem.
Re-read your previous threads:
http://www.blackhatworld.com/blackh...ridiculously-frustrating-i-have-no-money.html
http://www.blackhatworld.com/blackh...e/820777-im-unemployable-what-f-ck-going.html
http://www.blackhatworld.com/blackh...055-would-you-consider-greedy-bad-person.html

The only person that can actually help you is YOU. Solutions to your problems won't drop from the sky, you have to actively seek them out ... in the RIGHT places.

Good Luck.

 

[pewep]

Never been to a head shrink, never gonna see one. I don't trust the motherfuckers and I'll be god damned before some random asshole stuffs me full of toxic pills.

 

[snowberry]

^ +1

Well I'm not going to register and make all these accounts to all those different forums, and then abandon them after. This sub forum is general/all purpose is it not. I see tons of other users starting threads & complaining about their own BS here, why should I be an exception
& if you noticed, with all those therapy/self help/support forums, the same people who asked for advice there, are still there years later with the same problems. No one ever finds a real solution, they just go in circles asking for advice again how to cope, or to complain again. It all just feeds on itself...that's the problem with finding like-minded people with the same issues as yourself, that negative energy continues to rub off on you and you never break free from it, cause basically people go there for support and to 'cope' but don't have any real answers

I don't have an idea how to stop feeling/thinking this way if that's what you asked Lincoln...except maybe accept the situation and those mistakes which is hard enough when you want things to be a certain way, wanting it all to be 'right'. I've always been irritable/angry by nature

 

[pewep]

^ +1

Well I'm not going to register and make all these accounts to all those different forums, and then abandon them after. This sub forum is general/all purpose is it not. I see tons of other users starting threads & complaining about their own BS here, why should I be an exception
& if you noticed, with all those therapy/self help/support forums, the same people who asked for advice there, are still there years later with the same problems. No one ever finds a real solution, they just go in circles asking for advice again how to cope, or to complain again. It all just feeds on itself...that's the problem with finding like-minded people with the same issues as yourself, that negative energy continues to rub off on you and you never break free from it, cause basically people go there for support and to 'cope' but don't have any real answers

I don't have an idea how to stop feeling/thinking this way if that's what you asked Lincoln...except maybe accept the situation and those mistakes which is hard enough when you want things to be a certain way, wanting it all to be 'right'. I've always been irritable/angry by nature

Same, both my dad and I have serious anger management issues but I've learned to control it 95% of the time through meditation. Most people think I'm super nice but I'm really not always, I just control myself. The way I see it is that I can't help who I really am but I can make sure nobody has to deal with a prick - that much I can guarantee.

 

[The Owl]

Maybe they were just having a bad day?

 

[Wilson Grant Fisk]

^ +1

Well I'm not going to register and make all these accounts to all those different forums, and then abandon them after. This sub forum is general/all purpose is it not. I see tons of other users starting threads & complaining about their own BS here, why should I be an exception
& if you noticed, with all those therapy/self help/support forums, the same people who asked for advice there, are still there years later with the same problems. No one ever finds a real solution, they just go in circles asking for advice again how to cope, or to complain again. It all just feeds on itself...that's the problem with finding like-minded people with the same issues as yourself, that negative energy continues to rub off on you and you never break free from it, cause basically people go there for support and to 'cope' but don't have any real answers

I don't have an idea how to stop feeling/thinking this way if that's what you asked Lincoln...except maybe accept the situation and those mistakes which is hard enough when you want things to be a certain way, wanting it all to be 'right'. I've always been irritable/angry by nature

Of course you are entitled to make threads in The Lounge, one or two and people will respond and try to help, and you are free to take or ignore their advice.
If you start making many negative threads though then people will see you as a whining complainer and will be less inclined to engage with you because you bring them down.

It can be hard, but you need to take control of your life, and if changes are necessary then you need to find the strength to make them.