First few minutes after waking up

[Fragmaster]

Hey @Bread
I also think this is far smaller problem than it seems. Few fucked up thoughts here and there, its not a big deal actually when i think about it. I'm not obsessed. It was just a weird thing, and i wondered if it happens to others.

As for sleep i sleep as much as i can and want. That is one of high priorities for me. I love thinking, reading, writing, experimenting a lot, and sleep deprivation is not acceptable. I'm done with alarm clocks for life.

 

[ThopHayt]

Not even joking, starting your morning with a big jolt of coffee and a fap is probably the easiest way to clear the brain. Secondly, stop allowing yourself to think about shit like that. You control the subject matter of your thoughts, start practicing that control and you'll get better at ignoring harmful little side thoughts like that.

-ThopHayt

 

[Bread]

Hey @Bread
I also think this is far smaller problem than it seems. Few fucked up thoughts here and there, its not a big deal actually when i think about it. I'm not obsessed. It was just a weird thing, and i wondered if it happens to others.

As for sleep i sleep as much as i can and want. That is one of high priorities for me. I love thinking, reading, writing, experimenting a lot, and sleep deprivation is not acceptable. I'm done with alarm clocks for life.

Consider not depriving yourself of sleep, but keeping to a regular sleep schedule. I find it makes me feel better, and it's worth a try. If it doesn't work out you haven't lost anything.

In reality the spectrum of being "normal" mentally is very wide, and you may find if people open up to you those weird quirks you think you had are normal and others experience it. I would probably suggest setting yourself goals and have a target to complete something big/long term. If you are just aimlessly walking the path of life you can get caught up in stuff that was small initially.

I'm a bit tired but I hope that makes sense to you

 

[Jure321]

I have this problem recently. No, it's not about morning wood. Almost every day, when I wake up, I'm a different person. Usually, it lasts less than 20-30 seconds, I have series of thoughts, deprived of any emotion, subjective goals, or my life "context". As if things I'm supposed to think about aren't loaded in my brain yet. And those thoughts are grim, always something like this :

"my life is actually meaningless on greater scale"
"death is ok"
"humans are bad terrible creatures, but we have mental barriers to accept it as truth"
"humans are just cannibals in the way, exploiting each other"

I'm usually never fucked up in the head. I don't suffer, whine, I'm pragmatic person, seeking for win-win situations daily. Maybe opportunist of a kind, but not in a sick twisted way. I wouldn't accept suffering of others as price for my success.

I talked to few people about it, and among boring expected answers, one answer was how it is state achieved by meditation. I would like to hear some opinions. I'm ok with some troll answers, but don't push it.

I sometimes think that way too. I think it is completely normal to go deeper then everyday subjects like make money, get a girl, have a sex... And I do agree with your points that life is sometimes meaningless, but then I think of the people who loves me and they are the one that gives meaning to my life. Your friends, family, partner. Live to help them. It will help you.

 

[Fragmaster]

Ok maybe i wasn't specific enough in my initial post.
That weird sentences happen exclusively in first 20 seconds of my wake time. Until next morning.
I was trying to understand why am i different person for 20 seconds.

Im not depressed.

Maybe i have split personalities.

 

[skaru]

All of those thoughts are pretty valid and not particularly grim at all, what's the big deal? Life is grim, people are mostly pretty fucked up and denying it makes no good. You just gotta realize that even though your life is meaningless on a greater scale it does not make it meaningless on YOUR scale. The easiest way to find "meaning" to your everyday life is maximizing the good stuff and minimizing the bad stuff, as corny as it sounds.

e: answered the wrong question now that you elaborated a bit. I guess that sort of stuff happens to lots of people, myself included. I could get a sick idea at 4 AM, write it down and the next morning once I look at it feel like a total retard. I think life would be pretty boring if you were always the "same".

 

[Sherb]

It's likely intrusive thoughts trying to push their way in when your mind is most groggy. I had similar feelings for a while, back before I started putting a big focus on productivity. My fix was installing the app Barcode Alarm Clock. The way it works is by forcing you to scan the barcode on your toothpaste tube before shutting off.

This causes you to immediately get up and perform a task versus laying there and letting your thoughts take hold. It also helps you brush your teeth right away.

Combining the new alarm with a solid but not too rigorous morning routine really helped me get over those intrusive thoughts.

Good luck Fagmaster.

 

[silverleafy]

I mean this in all honesty.

I make roughly 10k/month self employed with plenty of potential to make more or less if I keep at my current rate of demotivation. I quit a full time 45hr/week corporate job to work for myself in which I might put in 20 billable hours per work. You would think I'd be happy as a pig in shit, but I'm not. I try to convince myself to get back on the gig because I have built my life around my income. The place I have, 2 cars equaling 105k in value, memberships to local bars and all. If I let my demotivation go any longer, I run the risk of losing customers and everything. I can't figure out why I'm not happy, I can't find motivation to do more... better work that I'm capable of.

I went to see a doctor. She prescribed me a very low dosage (5MG) of some kind of anti-depressant, saying I might suffer mild depression from working at home. She's probably right, but that 5MG isn't doing anything. I've talked with numerous people who agree a small anti-depressant can benefit everyone. Look into it, for yourself. I need her to kick my dose up a little, because sometime I think she's right.

i feel the same ,sadly, the worst feeling ever

 

[Fragmaster]

I never imagined you guys love me so much , i love you too.
The devious experiment is set in motion. I will play horror sounds/music while i sleep, just to see how will it affect me.
Maybe :

 

[virtualpurity]

Its not that uncommon, a lot of people hate everything in the morning, but it can be a sign of lack of excitement or adventure.

Maybe you have made your life into one big routine that keeps on looping and there is no real challenge for your brain so overtime it starts thinking that you have reached your max and there is nothing more you can do resulting in bad and depressive thoughts.

On the other hand have you tried switching it off and on ?

 

[Fragmaster]

All of those thoughts are pretty valid and not particularly grim at all, what's the big deal? Life is grim, people are mostly pretty fucked up and denying it makes no good. You just gotta realize that even though your life is meaningless on a greater scale it does not make it meaningless on YOUR scale. The easiest way to find "meaning" to your everyday life is maximizing the good stuff and minimizing the bad stuff, as corny as it sounds.

e: answered the wrong question now that you elaborated a bit. I guess that sort of stuff happens to lots of people, myself included. I could get a sick idea at 4 AM, write it down and the next morning once I look at it feel like a total retard. I think life would be pretty boring if you were always the "same".

YES! It should matter to me, my thoughts should be subjective. But they are not during that wake up moment. Thats the point.

 

[Fragmaster]

It's likely intrusive thoughts trying to push their way in when your mind is most groggy. I had similar feelings for a while, back before I started putting a big focus on productivity. My fix was installing the app Barcode Alarm Clock. The way it works is by forcing you to scan the barcode on your toothpaste tube before shutting off.

This causes you to immediately get up and perform a task versus laying there and letting your thoughts take hold. It also helps you brush your teeth right away.

Combining the new alarm with a solid but not too rigorous morning routine really helped me get over those intrusive thoughts.

Good luck Fagmaster.

There is only 1 thing in this world that makes me really go psycho. Alarm clocks and sleep interruption. I'm glad it woked for you!
Reason why i hate alarm clocks is not laziness. It was my unfortunate past life, where i was constantly sleep deprived.

 

[Deleted member 720373]

What do you do in your free time?

If you are not feeling fulfilled in your leisure time but your work day is adequate for your needs then maybe consider doing something completely different, sports, cycling, walking. Maybe do a couple of hours volunteer work.

A new routine may give your mind something else to focus on.

 

[Fragmaster]

What do you do in your free time?

If you are not feeling fulfilled in your leisure time but your work day is adequate for your needs then maybe consider doing something completely different, sports, cycling, walking. Maybe do a couple of hours volunteer work.

A new routine may give your mind something else to focus on.

I drive a boat called "Slice of Life" . And cycle uphill.

 

[Sherb]

I drive a boat called "Slice of Life" . And cycle uphill.

Well there's your issue. Just don't let the Dark Passenger in.

Regarding hating alarm clocks, have you thought about something like this? https://www.amazon.com/Philips-Wake-Up-Colored-Simulation-HF3520/dp/B0093162RM/

 

[Deleted member 720373]

I drive a boat called "Slice of Life" . And cycle uphill.

Well I was way off then!

Oh well, hope you find a solution soon

 

[Fragmaster]

Oh i know. I will throw balloons with water at random passengers.
I'll use opener :
- Hello dark passenger
- Wha..
*SPLASH*