Why do friends and family think you will do marketing for them for nothing?!

Putting this out there because I feel this is very common.

In my family I have people who own businesses, and 2 people who own small record labels. For the past 5 years I constantly get asked by them for help.

Last night I was with family and they noticed one of my personal pages was doing well. Instantly they said "Do it for my business and I'll get you a drink".

... A DRINK?!

So I'm expected to help promote your business, which will make you rich, and in return I get a drink? I explained that things take time and effort, both of which cost money. The response I got was "But we're family you can sort me out".

The same thing happens with websites, and mobile apps. They ask me if I can develop them something for pennies, or for nothing.

I have done it in the past, and I learnt from my mistake.

What happens is you do a job for them to help them, but they have no serious interest in what you've done. They ask because they think you're available to help and they have this wacky idea that you can make them money. Once the job has been done they don't continue with it.

My uncles website has stagnated. After launch he did nothing with it. I got a quick thank you and that was that. It took me weeks to get images and details off him and every time I called him to ask him for them it felt like I was pestering him and that my calls were annoying him.

The annoying thing is he asked for another website recently. Asked if I could "help him out". I refused and said I was busy. I found out he paid $500 for this job. It annoys me that they can pay others but expect my work for free. The project he paid for is laughable. He employed this guy soley on the fact that this guys website had "moving text". Seriously.

My response from now on is if you want my time it's $60 an hour like everyone else and if you can't afford it then you have no serious interest in paying for my time.

I'll give my uncle credit, he's always there to help me out. But, the rest of them have never helped me. One is a big name in the music scene and has never reposted my music, never passed me music onto labels or helped promote it to his following - even though my music is in leagues above his own. This person expects everything from me and does nothing in return.

I guess these people exist in all walks of life, it just so happens I'm related to some of them.

</rant>

Wrote this a week or so back. Applies here too:

I don't mind helping family and friends with that kind of thing at all (phones and shit like that). I also offer family members free web design services with the caveat that I get to use their sites in my portfolio for future clients. Works out well, lets me practice my craft and try out experiments, gives me an excuse to spend time with family members, helps them out, and helps build my portfolio up. Win win win win.

Do good deeds on your own terms, don't be selfish but don't let yourself get walked all over.

Sherbert Hoover said:

Wrote this a week or so back. Applies here too:

I don't mind helping family and friends with that kind of thing at all (phones and shit like that). I also offer family members free web design services with the caveat that I get to use their sites in my portfolio for future clients. Works out well, lets me practice my craft and try out experiments, gives me an excuse to spend time with family members, helps them out, and helps build my portfolio up. Win win win win.

Do good deeds on your own terms, don't be selfish but don't let yourself get walked all over.

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In the beginning when starting out I would do the same thing. I didn't mind helping because I seen it as an opportunity to promote my work and hopefully get some paid work in return. But these days I couldn't afford to do that. Most of my time is paid for by clients, or my own personal ventures. If I was to invest time in family ventures without pay it would eat into my paid time.

Although I do agree with you.

those guy no even interesting with what u doing.......they no see what is the cost of doing this is 'time'...

dun brother with them ,alot of such people around us,

bad thing is when a person get his piece of cake and stops at some point. Evolving your business is a main goal for an business man. Because if you do nothing your opponents doing something for sure. And in local business niches people still think that IM works same as ofline business. Get your piece of cake one time and eat it till you die. As i see here main prolem is not about free help but about helping some one who considers your work something that is not even worth money. Demotivating shit. Especially from family members.

DiMaster said:

bad thing is when a person get his piece of cake and stops at some point. Evolving your business is a main goal for an business man. Because if you do nothing your opponents doing something for sure. And in local business niches people still think that IM works same as ofline business. Get your piece of cake one time and eat it till you die. As i see here main prolem is not about free help but about helping some one who considers your work something that is not even worth money. Demotivating shit. Especially from family members.

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Yeah man, it's exactly this. It's like me expecting them to replace my guttering for free.

Relatable

I am 100% with you man. Even employers want some shit done for free from time to time like I should spend my free time doing their stuff.

I thought such requests are only in Russia (or the ex.USSR countries). Also received many such requests in the past, but after saying price they lagged

What I used to do, (which actually worked out just fine for all parties), was to give them informal help and not get too transactional, i.e. rather than commit any of my personal time, suggest what you think in your experience would help them, (I used to refer all "family/friends", to a bloke I knew whom in turn paid me a referral fee).

Is this mean or cheap?

Absolutely not! If your acquaintance is serious, they won't have an issue with this.

Your time is THE most precious commodity, money after all comes and goes, but lost time is lost forever, mate!

The rules of conduct, with all friends and family are just far too grey, undefined and everyone involved is never fully satisfied in the end, IMHO.

If you owe someone a favour, do by all means reciprocate, but in my experience, family + business is like oil and water, they just don't mix!

Take it from me, be aggressive with your business time and always be mindful of opportunity costs...

My parents fed me, put a roof over my head, bathe me, took care of me, pay for my clothes, pay for food, they pay for everything. So if they were to ask for something I would do it right away. My mom is a real estate agent. She needed a few small things done and I did it.
My brother designed her a site. But also my brother did fb ads for her and if that got her a client she would give him $500 I think.

makistoj said:

My parents fed me, put a roof over my head, bathe me, took care of me, pay for my clothes, pay for food, they pay for everything. So if they were to ask for something I would do it right away. My mom is a real estate agent. She needed a few small things done and I did it.
My brother designed her a site. But also my brother did fb ads for her and if that got her a client she would give him $500 I think.

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That's a different situation altogether. I would help my parents succeed if they requested my help. Neither of them own businesses. I am helping my mother put a business idea together as she's very ill and in pain at the moment. She wants to write articles from home for a living.

makistoj said:

My parents fed me, put a roof over my head, bathe me, took care of me, pay for my clothes, pay for food, they pay for everything. So if they were to ask for something I would do it right away. My mom is a real estate agent. She needed a few small things done and I did it.
My brother designed her a site. But also my brother did fb ads for her and if that got her a client she would give him $500 I think.

Click to expand...

Bit of a no brainer here though isn't it?

Useless your name is Alan B'stard!