:( Wanted to share my pain with you..

Mates, I love this place, this community, this whole ecosystem I should say.. I really hate to sound pitiful and desperate. I rarely feel this way.

I'm 18 years old and I've decided to leave the house.. I hate being given the impression that I'm being done a favour in having shelter or food. I do respect the rules of the house, but I also believe that when a small area has been allocated to me, I've got the right to do whatever I want, provided I don't disturb anyone or anything beyond this area. Whether I want to make a circus, a zoo, a bin or a conference of that room, I feel I should be able to do it if I'm not disturbing anyone.

I'm sick of being reminded who this house belongs to etc. If it's that way, they shouldn't have tagged that room as MINE..

I currently have no income. I have already written down my action plan which I had decided to put to execution one week after my exams (doing A-Levels, which finishes in one week).

However I'm leaving the house, I don't know when I'll have internet access again. I prefer to live on the streets rather than living on terms and conditions. I'll stay here 1 week max.. If I don't have appropriate lodging by then, then I'll really go on the streets..

Also, I'm not giving up on anything. It's just gonna be harder.. Don't get me wrong. I'm not looking for advice, pity, or anything. Just wanted to share the pain with this BHW family. I love you mates..

Can i have your room then?

Good luck, stay strong. If I were you though, I'd comply with your current situation until you start banking, then move.

Lemme know if you need help on your general direction (money wise). Cheers!

I do know how you feel about the situations. All the best but I am sure there will be a phase in lif when you will brand the move as a mistake........i'd say........GROW UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I don't think you should be too hasty with this Muscleteen.

Yes, you should be allowed to personalise your room but there are limits which you should respect.

I agree with Pewep that you should bank some money and also have a regular income before bailing out. Otherwise, you may end up on the streets and being pimped out, whether you consent to it or not!!

Another quality post in BHW. Man, are we making some progress!!!!!!

beazt said:

Another quality post in BHW. Man, are we making some progress!!!!!!

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The OP has started this thread in the lounge where it is perfectly permissible to discuss off-beat topics.

Is it a rented gaff or do you own it?

Terms and conditions are something you have to live with bud - if its rented of course there will be rules, I wouldn't rent my place out and say 'yeah do what the hell you want', I will have you sign a contract saying what you can and can't do in that house.

Get used to it, whether you make a quid or a million quid you will always have to follow rules.

Why put yourself on the streets just because you don't like the rules - not giving you crap or anything but you sound like my 4 year old when she doesn't get her own way at the sweet shop!!

Men unleashed his greatest ability when he's cornered. I'm not saying you're cornered, but I'm sure this is just a stepping stone 'til you find your way on your OWN home. Keep that chin up, OP!

Keep the room till you earn more and have the cash to move. Without the internet or money you can't make money in IM and how will you make money on the street, how would you even shower or keep fresh clothes for work? Sounds like pimpin would be your thing...

stay strong bro! " Nobody gets to live life backward. Look ahead, that is where your future lies."

I will advice you to better get some bank and then move on.. You are cutting the branch on which you are sitting.

muscleteen said:

However I'm leaving the house, I don't know when I'll have internet access again. I prefer to live on the streets rather than living on terms and conditions. I'll stay here 1 week max.. If I don't have appropriate lodging by then, then I'll really go on the streets..

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So you'll take the free room for another week and then move on?

Look, if you are not going to respect the rules of the house (one rule being that there are limits to how you keep your allotted space) then you should leave now. Staying there under those conditions is just taking advantage.

If you want some free counsel from an old guy, I would suggest a sit down with the owners of the house (I assume your folks), share your frustration and see if you can work out something.

If you leave as you are indicating, you will probably cause a riff with the owners of the house (again I assume your folks) and that will suck for everyone.

Don't go setting fire to a bridge because of an almost non-issue.

Dude, if you leave your room, you'll have to get a crappy job so you can rent a crappy room or small apartment and will get to eat maybe 2 crappy meals a day if things go well.

How about you swallow your pride for a while and focus your anger at succeeding at IM? I'm sure your folks will be proud of you when you'll show them all the big checks from CPA networks.

muscleteen said:

However I'm leaving the house, I don't know when I'll have internet access again. I prefer to live on the streets rather than living on terms and conditions. I'll stay here 1 week max.. If I don't have appropriate lodging by then, then I'll really go on the streets..

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I normally write much cleaner, but I wrote this without filtering myself. Sorry I didn't want to stop to edit myself.

Take this from someone who has had to live "on the street" twice. I ran away from home when I was 17 years old, from New Hampshire, and went to Florida for 6 months before I got picked up by cops (Well, it was actually me living in Pensecola, Florida and working at a Waffle House in Mobile Alabama, but that's really inconsequential) because the girl I had been with for 2 years wound up moving there. I thought this was the end of the world, hatched the plan to run away to be with her, and followed through with it. This worked out for a little bit because her parents were fucked up, but after about 3 or 4 months I got a ride home from work and all my shit was out on the front porch and they refused to answer the door. It was fucked up, and I was lucky enough to have made some friends so I was able to couch hop for a few days. I didn't tell anyone my EXACT situation though, and after a week couch hopping wasn't cutting it. I remember sleeping at work, in the car of someone I worked with when he was at work, in the laundry room of a Holiday Inn Express a couple of times (until I overslept one day and some of the maintenance crew found me, two days after which you needed a key to use the laundry room) Shit, towards the end, I remember sleeping in a sort of runoff ditch that was completely obscured by huge hedges that was in front of another hotel. I eventually got picked up by cops one day when I was sleeping in my friends passenger seat and he got pulled over for blowing a red light. Apparently they check everyones ID in Florida, I don't know, that's what they said at the time. Given that they had just woken me up, compiling a story wasn't an option. Long story made short here, after a week in a detention center waiting for a parent to come and get me, I went back to New Hampshire.

Now, to relengthen that long story...When I got back to New Hampshire things did not end. When I had run away to Florida I had essentially dropped out of High School. Due to this, my parents would not let me move back in. They were PISSED, and due to the fact that I had just turned 18...yeah. So now I'm in a much colder environment, and I still have no place to stay. The only plus side here was that I hadn't talked to any of my friends for about 6 months, so they were all extremely happy to see me and I didn't have a difficult time finding a place to stay. I wound up getting two jobs, buying a car, and reenrolling in high school. I slept in my car, and snagged showers at various friends houses. As simple as this sounds, it was winter when I was doing this. It's easy to fall asleep in a car when you just turned the heat off...not so much fun waking up to the biting cold though.

In the end, I got an apartment with a friend of mine and lived happily for a few years.

Sadly, though, I wasn't the brightest kid. I no longer had parents watching my back to make sure I didn't make some of the mistakes I did make. I wound up getting a great job selling DirecTV for $11 an hour plus commission. I got my first credit card...treated it well...they upgraded it to gold...I got a second one that started as gold....they upgraded the first to platinum...I wound up getting about 6 or 7 store cards (clothing stores, SEARS, etc.) and I was able to use them and pay them all off...then the company I worked for decided they would be outsourcing from now on...and I had nothing coming in...So now, about 2 months before my 21st birthday, I was broke and I had debt collectors crawling all up my ass. Another long story short, I avoided them...wound up seeing an ad in one of those free employment papers to sell magazines door to door cross country and went off to do that...wound up in dallas texas a few months later and hated the people I worked for and wound up coming home to NH. I showed up at a friends house when I got back and pretty much moved myself in on the guise I would just stay a few days. That few days turned into much longer.

Eventually I started doing coke and went through another down period, where I had nothing, I even slept in the laundry room of an apartment complex once or twice. One of those nights was after a new years eve party when I had about an eightball of coke in me....which is quite possibly the worst night I've ever had.

Anyway...that's all about 4 or 5 years ago now from the last time I've been down and out. I just say all this because, though you may hate the rules of the house you live in...well...IT'S FREE! You have access to free food, free room and board, FREE INTERNET, a place to keep your computer, a place to stay warm and dry while you work, etc. DON'T JUST LEAVE! Build up some money first, make sure you can live comfortably before you just decide that the streets would be better. Your friends are your friends but they will only tolerate so much before they tell you to go fuck yourself too.

You want to share pain? No thanks. I am all stocked up here.

No. Seriously hang in there!

OP-

Hey buddy, your very young, and your age is showing...im not slating you btw mate....

My big brother was exactly the same as you, hel left home at 17 and moved to san francisco chasing a graphics opportuntiy (i think him and a friend were involved with waynes world design or something)...anyway....

He lived this "week to week" life until i got the police at the door last year at 4am. They told me my brother was dead. Turns out he had lung cancer but never told anyone, he was sleeping rough and ended up at a terminally ill sleeping rough in a street called "eddy street" which was a fuck*n shithol*.

I'll never forget the moment my mum broke down when i had to break it to her...dont do it...PLEASE!!

P.L.E.A.S.E. Dont do it mate, youve got the essentials of food and shelter, which is more than the people i seen in SF had.

Dont make hasty desicions, youve a whole life ahead of you my friend, a whole life to be in charge.

Take Care Mate

So what is it that you want to be doing in "your room" that makes you so desperate to make such a bonehead move? Drugs? Girls?

Respect the rules and get used to it. High school was a piece of cake. Once you're out in the real world, there are a lot more rules to live by.

Oh, and grow a pair! They'll come in handy!

it's free. suck it up and kiss their asses.