Take it easy

Yes

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Just got a call that a colleague of mine died of MI yesterday (aged 29 for context). I knew him from a very young age and actually looked up to him as he was an all round nice guy.

He turned dark when he was around 22. He started drinking and smoking heavily as a means to cope with family trouble and life in general. Someone looked at him the wrong way, smoke. Someone did something he didn’t agree with, smoke. Tea break? Smoke. And of course, liquor every night of the week because it was “boys time”.

As men, we’re often not encouraged to talk about our emotions or how we feel and it’s much more common to use unhealthy habits to cope with our distress. I know this for a fact as I too was a bit like him and am trying my best to grow out of it. You don’t have to bawl your eyes out but it might be a better idea to understand why you feel the way you feel and find helpful ways to deal with it.

Talk to a friend or family or hire a therapist if you don’t have the first two. Something.

Take it easy and don’t stress yourself out too much.

PS. Our mutual friends’ idea to deal with this loss is to get drunk tonight (an invite which I politely declined but you get what I mean).
 

Mrnewbie

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I am so sorry about your friend, and my condolences go out to you and his family. Thanks for reminding us that we should care for ourselves and help others. If you need anything, I am here.
 

Zombie Pop

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Sorry for your loss. There’s been plenty of times I look back on where if I had spoken with a therapist I probably wouldn’t have done stupid things later. So I agree with talking to someone about what’s going on in life when it seems hard or unfair.

What is MI?
 

GainTheImpossible

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My condolences to your friend(colleague).

I've always suggested that if anybody needs help, then seek it. Waiting for the problems and issues to overcome you it's just not worth it.

Fellow men, stop being prideful and seek the help you need :). Also take it easy while making money, in the end, you need the life to spend it :)
 
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Gogol

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I had known someone who died of the same.. Had the same trouble and he even took money from us which he never paid back. I am least bothered about the money, but… Really sad to see him die. Take care people. I have been through this myself and I know how tough it is to get rid of the drinking habits. Really, speak to someone if you need to.
 
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Mastey577

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As men, we’re often not encouraged to talk about our emotions or how we feel and it’s much more common to use unhealthy habits to cope with our distress.
First off, sorry for your loss. And what you said is deep and true, at some point we face challenges that will make or mar us getting the right pillar to hold in too is paramount at all stages of life. Drugs give a temporary fix and make matters worse afterwards, we don't talk about God much on the forum but we need Him the most.

All the best to everyone...
 
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snowboardman

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He turned dark when he was around 22. He started drinking and smoking heavily as a means to cope with family trouble and life in general. Someone looked at him the wrong way, smoke. Someone did something he didn’t agree with, smoke. Tea break? Smoke. And of course, liquor every night of the week because it was “boys time”.
you just resumed his last 7 years in a paragraph of bad habbits ... that's not nice
 

pcsup

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Sorry bro, my condolences to you and his family.
 
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Razentyler

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Men talking about their emotions is such a big stigma in this society, Men have emotions too and it has to be taken out being a human being. People confuse masculinity over not having emotions but I think that's not the case though

RIP for your friend!
 

reaaski

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Shit. Sorry to hear that. I heard this happen to cocaine addicts around me, but they survived, not even being in their 30s. Some died from morphine though. I know a couple of guys who are into it, but they don't think that cardiac arrest or similar tragedy will happen to them. I warned them and broke ties cause they are dangerous giving it to everyone around themselves. Yes, you get free coke if you have friends who do it. Better don't have friends at all if you have friends like that.

Take care and ditch your bad habits, including caffeine and beer. Sugar is good if you want reward.
 
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GenesisOne

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Please don't make a generalization from a single case.
I've lost more non-dinking-non-smoking friends than those who do.
For me, smoking + pina colada, has gone well so far, and... I am not looking to die healthy.
 
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