Post your funny/dirty jokes here!

Discussion in 'BlackHat Lounge' started by Sophie, Aug 3, 2011.

  1. Sophie

    Sophie Elite Member

    Mar 5, 2009
    Likes Received:
    Please post the funny dirty or normal jokes you have ever heard so far.

    Here's one I recently read:

    Once upon a time lived a beautiful Queen with large breasts.

    Nick the Dragon Slayer obsessed over the Queen for this reason.
    He knew that the penalty for his desire would be death should he try
    to touch them, but he had to try.

    One day Nick revealed his secret desire to his colleague, Horatio
    the Physician, the King's chief doctor.. Horatio thought about this and
    said that he could arrange for Nick to more than satisfy his desire, but
    it would cost him 1000 gold coins to arrange it.

    Without pause Nick readily agreed to the scheme.

    The next day, Horatio made a batch of itching powder and poured a
    little bit into the Queen's bra while she bathed.

    Soon after she dressed, the itching commenced and grew intense.

    Upon being summoned to the Royal Chambers to address this incident,
    Horatio informed the King and Queen that only a special saliva, if
    applied for four hours, would cure this type of itch, and that tests
    had shown that only the saliva of Nick would work as the antidote to
    cure the itch.

    The King, eager to help his Queen, quickly summoned Nick to their
    chambers.. Horatio then slipped Nick the antidote for the itching
    powder, which he put into his mouth, and for the next four hours,
    Nick worked passionately on the Queen's large and magnificent breasts.

    The Queen's itching was eventually relieved, and Nick left satisfied and
    hailed as a hero.

    Upon returning to his chamber, Nick found Horatio demanding his
    payment of 1000 gold coins. With his obsession now satisfied, Nick couldn't
    have cared less knowing that Horatio could never report this matter to
    the King and with a laugh told him to get lost.

    The next day, Horatio slipped a massive dose of the same itching
    powder into the King's underwear. The King immediately summoned Nick.

    The moral of the story - Pay your bloody bills !!!
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  2. TheSuperSensation

    TheSuperSensation Regular Member

    Apr 15, 2011
    Likes Received:

    Well, I only have a poem to share
    I love you,
    you love me,
    Barney gave me HIV,
    It all started with a kiss,
    But barney wanted more,
    I got raped by a dinosaur.