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MAN Rules of 2013

Discussion in 'BlackHat Lounge' started by souldetective, Apr 17, 2013.

  1. souldetective

    souldetective Regular Member

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    MAN RULES


    AT LAST A GUY HAS TAKEN THE TIME TO WRITE THIS ALL DOWN
    FINALLY, the guys' side of the story. ( I MUST ADMIT, IT'S PRETTY GOOD.)


    WE ALWAYS HEAR 'THE RULES' FROM THE FEMALE SIDE
    NOW HERE ARE THE RULES FROM THE MALE SIDE


    THESE ARE OUR RULES!


    PLEASE NOTE. THESE ARE ALL NUMBERED #1 ON PURPOSE!


    1. MEN ARE NOT MIND READERS.

    1. LEARN TO WORK THE TOILET SEAT. YOU'RE A BIG GIRL. IF IT'S UP, PUT IT DOWN. WE NEED IT UP, YOU NEED IT DOWN. YOU DON'T HEAR US COMPLAINING ABOUT YOU LEAVING IT DOWN.

    1. CRYING IS BLACKMAIL.

    1. ASK FOR WHAT YOU WANT. LET US BE CLEAR ON THIS ONE:

    SUBTLE HINTS DO NOT WORK!
    STRONG HINTS DO NOT WORK!
    OBVIOUS HINTS DO NOT WORK!
    JUST SAY IT!

    1. YES AND NO ARE PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE ANSWERS TO ALMOST EVERY QUESTION.

    1.. COME TO US WITH A PROBLEM ONLY IF YOU WANT HELP SOLVING IT. THAT'S WHAT WE DO. SYMPATHY IS WHAT YOUR GIRLFRIENDS ARE FOR.

    1. ANYTHING WE SAID 6 MONTHS AGO IS INADMISSIBLE IN AN ARGUMENT. IN FACT, ALL COMMENTS BECOME NULL AND VOID AFTER 7 DAYS.

    1. IF YOU THINK YOU'RE FAT, YOU PROBABLY ARE. DON'T ASK US.

    1. IF SOMETHING WE SAID CAN BE INTERPRETED TWO WAYS AND ONE OF THE WAYS MAKES YOU SAD OR ANGRY, WE MEANT THE OTHER ONE.

    1. YOU CAN EITHER ASK US TO DO SOMETHING OR TELL US HOW YOU WANT IT DONE. NOT BOTH. IF YOU ALREADY KNOW BEST HOW TO DO IT, JUST DO IT YOURSELF.

    1. WHENEVER POSSIBLE, PLEASE SAY WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO SAY DURING COMMERCIALS.

    1. CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS DID NOT NEED DIRECTIONS AND NEITHER DO WE...

    1. ALL MEN SEE IN ONLY 16 COLORS, LIKE WINDOWS DEFAULT SETTINGS..PEACH, FOR EXAMPLE, IS A FRUIT, NOT A COLOR. PUMPKIN IS ALSO A FRUIT. WE HAVE NO IDEA WHAT MAUVE IS.

    1. IF WE ASK WHAT IS WRONG AND YOU SAY 'NOTHING,' WE WILL ACT LIKE NOTHING'S WRONG. WE KNOW YOU ARE LYING, BUT IT IS JUST NOT WORTH THE HASSLE.

    1. IF YOU ASK A QUESTION YOU DON'T WANT AN ANSWER TO, EXPECT AN ANSWER YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR..

    1. WHEN WE HAVE TO GO SOMEWHERE, ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING YOU WEAR IS FINE...REALLY.

    1.. DON'T ASK US WHAT WE'RE THINKING ABOUT UNLESS YOU ARE PREPARED TO DISCUSS SUCH TOPICS AS FOOTBALL OR MOTOR SPORTS.

    1. YOU HAVE ENOUGH CLOTHES.

    1 .. YOU HAVE TOO MANY SHOES.

    1. I AM IN SHAPE. ROUND IS A SHAPE!

    1.. THANK YOU FOR READING THIS. YES, I KNOW, I HAVE TO SLEEP ON THE COUCH TONIGHT.. BUT DID YOU KNOW MEN REALLY DON'T MIND THAT? IT'S LIKE CAMPING...



    PASS THIS TO AS MANY MEN AS YOU CAN - TO GIVE THEM A LAUGH...


    PASS THIS TO AS MANY WOMEN AS YOU CAN - TO GIVE THEM A BIGGER LAUGH, BECAUSE ITS TRUE!
     
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    Last edited: Apr 17, 2013
  2. BrianKade001

    BrianKade001 BANNED BANNED

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    Change the color. It's tough to read. In fact, I didn't read this post primarily because of the color you used.
     
  3. sn0rt

    sn0rt Elite Member

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    Occupation:
    "Most obstacles melt away when we make up our mind
    Location:
    "Knowing is not enough; we must apply. Willing is
    Some of those are funny as shit. Good read.

    1. MEN ARE NOT MIND READERS.

    1. LEARN TO WORK THE TOILET SEAT. YOU'RE A BIG GIRL. IF IT'S UP, PUT IT DOWN. WE NEED IT UP, YOU NEED IT DOWN. YOU DON'T HEAR US COMPLAINING ABOUT YOU LEAVING IT DOWN.

    1. CRYING IS BLACKMAIL.

    1. ASK FOR WHAT YOU WANT. LET US BE CLEAR ON THIS ONE:

    SUBTLE HINTS DO NOT WORK!
    STRONG HINTS DO NOT WORK!
    OBVIOUS HINTS DO NOT WORK!
    JUST SAY IT!

    1. YES AND NO ARE PERFECTLY ACCEPTABLE ANSWERS TO ALMOST EVERY QUESTION.

    1.. COME TO US WITH A PROBLEM ONLY IF YOU WANT HELP SOLVING IT. THAT'S WHAT WE DO. SYMPATHY IS WHAT YOUR GIRLFRIENDS ARE FOR.

    1. ANYTHING WE SAID 6 MONTHS AGO IS INADMISSIBLE IN AN ARGUMENT. IN FACT, ALL COMMENTS BECOME NULL AND VOID AFTER 7 DAYS.

    1. IF YOU THINK YOU'RE FAT, YOU PROBABLY ARE. DON'T ASK US.

    1. IF SOMETHING WE SAID CAN BE INTERPRETED TWO WAYS AND ONE OF THE WAYS MAKES YOU SAD OR ANGRY, WE MEANT THE OTHER ONE.

    1. YOU CAN EITHER ASK US TO DO SOMETHING OR TELL US HOW YOU WANT IT DONE. NOT BOTH. IF YOU ALREADY KNOW BEST HOW TO DO IT, JUST DO IT YOURSELF.

    1. WHENEVER POSSIBLE, PLEASE SAY WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO SAY DURING COMMERCIALS.

    1. CHRISTOPHER COLUMBUS DID NOT NEED DIRECTIONS AND NEITHER DO WE...

    1. ALL MEN SEE IN ONLY 16 COLORS, LIKE WINDOWS DEFAULT SETTINGS..PEACH, FOR EXAMPLE, IS A FRUIT, NOT A COLOR. PUMPKIN IS ALSO A FRUIT. WE HAVE NO IDEA WHAT MAUVE IS.

    1. IF WE ASK WHAT IS WRONG AND YOU SAY 'NOTHING,' WE WILL ACT LIKE NOTHING'S WRONG. WE KNOW YOU ARE LYING, BUT IT IS JUST NOT WORTH THE HASSLE.

    1. IF YOU ASK A QUESTION YOU DON'T WANT AN ANSWER TO, EXPECT AN ANSWER YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR..

    1. WHEN WE HAVE TO GO SOMEWHERE, ABSOLUTELY ANYTHING YOU WEAR IS FINE...REALLY.

    1.. DON'T ASK US WHAT WE'RE THINKING ABOUT UNLESS YOU ARE PREPARED TO DISCUSS SUCH TOPICS AS FOOTBALL OR MOTOR SPORTS.

    1. YOU HAVE ENOUGH CLOTHES.

    1 .. YOU HAVE TOO MANY SHOES.

    1. I AM IN SHAPE. ROUND IS A SHAPE!

    1.. THANK YOU FOR READING THIS. YES, I KNOW, I HAVE TO SLEEP ON THE COUCH TONIGHT.. BUT DID YOU KNOW MEN REALLY DON'T MIND THAT? IT'S LIKE CAMPING...


    A bright enough for you guys, lol.
     
    Last edited: Apr 17, 2013
  4. gypsyr0ad

    gypsyr0ad Regular Member

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    Thanks, you could have used a better color though.
    either/or highlighting the text makes it readable.
     
  5. souldetective

    souldetective Regular Member

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    Electrical Engineer, internet marketer, Black hatt
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    1. ALL MEN SEE IN ONLY 16 COLORS, LIKE WINDOWS DEFAULT SETTINGS..PEACH, FOR EXAMPLE, IS A FRUIT, NOT A COLOR. PUMPKIN IS ALSO A FRUIT. WE HAVE NO IDEA WHAT MAUVE IS.

    Loved this one
     
  6. kvmcable

    kvmcable Supreme Member

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    I'm pretty sure pumpkin is a vegetable and not a fruit.
     
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  7. Oz0102

    Oz0102 Jr. VIP Jr. VIP

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  8. DownTheRabbitHole

    DownTheRabbitHole BANNED BANNED

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    These

    AND FUCKING THIS!
    The only one that I disagree with. I often make my wife change into something that I like more.
     
  9. souldetective

    souldetective Regular Member

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    color changed brain...
     
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