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Man Rules: ALL WOMEN MUST READ

Discussion in 'BlackHat Lounge' started by xplicit, Feb 6, 2009.

  1. xplicit

    xplicit BANNED BANNED

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    Finally , the guys' side of the story.
    ( I must admit, it's pretty good..)
    We always hear ' the rules ' from the female side.

    Now here are the rules from the male side.

    These are our rules!
    Please note.. these are all numbered '1 ' ON PURPOSE!

    The Man Rules :
    1. Men are NOT mind readers.

    1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
    You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.We need it up, you need it down.
    You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.


    1.Sunday sports:
    It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

    1. Crying is blackmail.

    1. Ask for what you want.
    Let us be clear on this one:
    Subtle hints do not work!
    Strong hints do not work!
    Obvious hints do not work!
    Just say it!


    1.Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every
    question.



    1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
    That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.


    1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.

    In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.


    1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
    Don't ask us.


    1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the
    ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.



    1.You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done.
    Not both.
    If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.


    1.Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials...


    1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions, and neither do we.


    1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
    Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
    We have no idea what mauve is.


    1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
    We do that.


    1. If we ask what is wrong and you say 'nothing,' We will act like nothing's wrong.
    We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.


    1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer
    you don't want to hear.



    1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is
    fine...

    Really .


    1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about
    Unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as football, motor racing or golf.


    1. You have too many shoes.

    1. I am in shape.
    Round IS a shape!

    1. WOMEN - Thank you for reading this.

    Yes, We know, We have to sleep on the couch tonight;
    But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.



    I hope that sums up all the questions and concerns about what men think. So if you have any questions. Please start with 1 and re-read it.
     
    • Thanks Thanks x 2
  2. professional20

    professional20 Power Member

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    Lol i've seen this one before and i absolutely love it! :D
     
  3. xplicit

    xplicit BANNED BANNED

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    I just read this tonight and laughed my ass off. Actually gonna print it out for the wife. I thought some members would get a kick out of it....

    (Hope we dont have any mean lady mods or admins....lol..... j/k)
     
  4. xr250h

    xr250h Registered Member

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    I'm totally bookmarking this so that whenever my girlfriend does one of those things, I'm just gonna redirect her to this thread. Thanks man :thumb:
     
  5. vexusdev

    vexusdev BANNED BANNED

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    I love how you said redirect as if your girlfriend was your computer.. what is this world coming too more alcohgolol please. :D
     
  6. xbox360gurl70s

    xbox360gurl70s Elite Member

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    I must say..........
     
  7. xplicit

    xplicit BANNED BANNED

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    LOL.... Thats the response we men expected....:p
     
  8. MoneyMachine

    MoneyMachine Junior Member

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    Haha brilliant! This list should be posted on the door of every ladies room in the country.
     
  9. 1link

    1link Registered Member

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    This is Cooooooooooooooooooool :D Taking a printout now.... for my GF ofcourse ;)
     
  10. aliskorn

    aliskorn Jr. VIP Jr. VIP Premium Member

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    I`m printing this and hanging it in my living room :D