I came across this interesting blog post. It's a good laugh. --------------------------------------------------------------------- So I got me a job to keep my mind off the bad things that have been happening lately. Plus I needed to stay away from World of Warcraft as far as possible due to the fact it has been ruining my life. I decided the best job to keep my mind off it was to be a security guard. Started my day off at the mall, I'm scoutin around with my binoculars lookin' at girls tits. Some fly ass teenagers with double D's. Got my biceps flexed in case one felt like askin' me something. I walk down the stores to see if any punks causin trouble. I stop by the video game store and decided to see if any nerds where causing mahyem. Had to prove my alpha dominance. Fred: HAHA! I beat you Jaime: Your controller is better than mine! Rhino: I've heard enough from you two freaks talkin shit. Leave this joint before I get out my ketchup sauce. (They wouldn't allow pepper spray in canada because they are a bunch of pussies. (had to live there to earn some money ) Morana: Excuse me sir? Did these boys do anything wrong? Rhino: The only violation they made, sweet tits, is that the fact they were playing a lame ass game *Shoves warcraft 3 in her nose* Morana: *Gasps at how rude I am* I BEG YOUR PARDON.. Rhino: My job is done here, I'll escort these 2 felons to the main office for serious punishment. About now the pussy nerd boys were crying and begging for mercy. Hanging on to my sleeves and shit, I'm pissed off. Gonna knock them the fuck out if they keep this pussiness up. Canadians I tell ya.. I'm a nice guy so I dropped the whole thing. But in order for that to happen, I had a squeeze of Morana's fine tits and gave the boys 400$ ticket to learn their mistake. My job here is done . I was on my way to get lunch wen I see this fly brunette with what appears to be the size of vida guerra's ass. I knew that if I didn't touch or sniff it, I'd go home depressed. Proceeded in a gangsta fashion towards where she worked at. The flower shop. Caught her staring at my arms a few times so I decide to give her a show. Rhino: You ever seen a shotgun before? Linda: You have one?? Rhino: *flexes bicep* Linda: *giggles* Wow, your so handsome and tough. Very intellectual with your jokes too. Rhino: Tell me something I don't know Linda: I'd love to chat but -- Frank: HEY ASSHOLE! YEAH YOU, SECURITY CHUMP Rhino: Heh, exuse me for one second vida. *turns around* Linda: It's linda.. I can't believe it?! It's these two lil boys I gave the ticket to. They got their broke ass bald out of shape dad to sort me out. I'm about roll on the floor and laugh at this shit. Fuckin' canadians I tell ya.. Frank: Look here, As a brother Canadian I at least execpt you to tear these ticke -- Rhino: *takes off aviators* the fuck did you jus call me? Frank: ? Rhino: No one calls me a canadian and gets away with it. Frank: My mistake, I didn't reali-- From this point on I punched Frank so hard I sent him through the other store. Don't know what these walls are made out of in this country. Probably plastic. He's on the floor crying and shit while his boys laughin and pointing at him. was on my way to mcdonalds for a good healthy meal when suddenly I see my homes Dozer advertising world of warcraft posters.. I froze in my spot. The game that I love has found me again, even when I tried to leave it. This is true love I tell you. For some reason after I saw the poster, It sparked a new mentality in me. I ripped off my shirt in public and took off my pants, grabbed a pot plant and I was running down the escalators like a warrior. Security manager saw this and sent his boys on me. I bet these pussies never took on a warrior before. Both come up and try to handcuff me. Another mistake these canadians will never learn. "Never take on a warrior with ketchup sauce." Shit's going down now son. I squashed the packet of watties ketchup sauce into their eyes and smashed the pot plant on their head. I sprinted down the mall grabbing as much tits as possible and took four world of warcraft action figures (all warriors) I tripped up and was cuffed by security. I'm on my way to the Canadian head penitentiary. QOTD: Can anyone send me foreign gold so I can get out of here? Thanks.