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✅✅Journey to beat addiction&depression and getting healthier+finish more projects✅✅(weekly updated)

Discussion in 'My Journey Discussions' started by Billy Batts, Nov 24, 2019.

  1. AdultScriptPro

    AdultScriptPro Registered Member

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    Long story short, i can relate to your story. I've been suffering from OCD/depression all my life. I will be 40 next year. I will share a few things you can do, that if done correctly will 100% have effect in your life:

    1. Therapy. Find a good therapist and tell him your story, dont leave anything out. Get a diagnose, depression? ocd? anxiety? bipolar? Once you found out with what mental disorder you are dealing, learn everything about your disorder. You can find tons of articles on the internet or order books. Learn everything you can from the therapist on how to deal with your disorder. This does not happen over night, like it takes time, 1 year or more.
    2. If you dont want to do method 1, then start reading everything you can about depression. If you have recurring thaughts, obsessions, about bad things, then you also have ocd. Get self help books or read self help articles.
    3. Mindfulness! Like this is the best thing i have ever discovered...mindfulness is more or less meditation, but if learned and done correctly, you can incorporate this in your daily life. You have to meditate 20 minutes / day, every day. 10 minutes in the morning and 10 minutes in the evening. The easiest way is to do cubic respiration (google) and focus your attention on your breath. It does not matter if you have a quiet place or not, mindfulness does not mean you run or cast your thoughts out, it means you live with them, you study your thoughts, so let them go havok in your mind, without judging your thoughts, without thinking what your thoughts mean...in reality thoughts are nothing, thoughts are just a stupid explication our mind creates for the feelings that we have been pushing back...so whatever you feel let it out...let it run through your head, it doesnt mean anything...at the same time you push thoughts gentle back and focus on your breath. You can buy a book about this. The thing is, if you do this every day for 1-2 months, your brain actually learns to do this on his own, and you can apply this to everyday life without having to meditate. Its real and its been proven scientifically.
    4. Sports. Do whatever sports you like, jogging, gym, fitness, hiking...do it at least 3-5 times / week. For depression this very very important.
    5. Food. Start eating healthy. There are specific foods you can eat for depression (google).
    6. Find a support group. Whatever you are feeling or going through, i can guarantee you, you are not alone.
    7. I've grown up with an alcooholic father and i've almost also become an alcooholic. I used to drink every day when i was in my 20's. I used to smoke weed every day. Both are not good for your mental health. While everyone thinks
    week is healthy, it actually modifies how your brain works. So for example if you are feeling happy today, it will amplify happy, but if you are feeling depressive it will amplify sadness. If you do 1, 2 and 3 it will also help with your addictions. Addictions are a method you've developed to deal with your mind.
    8. Life in front of the computer is not helping us at all...staying all day in front of the computer actually increases our impulses, our depression...we need to go out as often as possible, find new hobbies, make new friends. Easier said than done, i know...
    9. There are a few books that helped me. Acceptance and commitment therapy, The Little Book of Mindfulness, Letting go: The Pathway of Surrender.
    10. If you need help sleeping, there is nothing better than melatonin. Its like the natural sleep hormone.

    I dont know if there is anything i could say, that would actually create an instant revelation and would help you, but i'm going to say that the past does not matter, the past can only control you if you think about the past...Hope this helps!
     
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    Last edited: Dec 8, 2019
  2. Billy Batts

    Billy Batts Jr. Executive VIP Jr. VIP

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    When and if I'm in the States I got a bunch of people to visit :D, what state you in?

    Old fart! :D hahaha I will be 40 next year too. To reply at your suggestions.

    1. Nope, have already spoke to several of them, I know exactly what is going on but none of them are on my level. Don't need em.
    2. Meh, A I'm not the reader type, B I don't have time for reading, I'm good. I assumed you read my other thread, I'm resilient ;) (and stubborn)
    3. I might check it out one day but ATM I'm too busy.
    4. This is what I'm picking up and getting more active in, slowly though as alcohol totally killed my stamina but getting there.
    5. Already started eating healthier
    6. No time and totally not interested sitting with people in the country I want to leave ASAP
    7. Welcome to my life, my mother, father are alcoholics and my mum I don't have contact with and my biological father left 2 weeks before I turned 1 plus several people in that family drug and alcohol addicts. I'm myself am an alcoholic although at current time I'm 25 days sober which is quite an achievement for me looking at the shitty year I was having.
    8. This is the second day I'm on an 18hour streak. You might have not noticed gheghe but I'm not like most people. I'm fine sitting at home all day, doing what I love, while listening to my music I'm all good. I've always been an einzelganger. Most people need to be social and every now and then they need to be alone, for me it's the other way around ;)
    9. No time :p people might not now it by looking at me but I have an IQ of 129, I'm fully aware of my mental state, what caused addictions, depressions etc I'm also fully aware how to deal with them when I stay sober.
    10. I sleep fine these days :)

    So yeah, I appreciate the time you took to write that all down but at this present moment I'm not depressed ;) and working my ass off to launch my shit this weekend but I've been building a site that is quite complex with several custom parts and a fully customized support forum so I'm quite busy :D

    @ziko12345 did you mean this thread?
     
  3. ziko12345

    ziko12345 Power Member

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    Yes, this one
     
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  4. AdultScriptPro

    AdultScriptPro Registered Member

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    Well..from what you replied it seems you are doing very good atm so my reply was kinda pointless :)). Even though i dont know you, i'm happy for you...i know how it feels to achieve this when you have the background you have! Hope your project goes well...i'm also working on a new script :))
     
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  5. Billy Batts

    Billy Batts Jr. Executive VIP Jr. VIP

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    I was typing this "Ok, well doing good I guess. 25 days sober and working hard to stay occupied" when my uncle called and said my mother is very sick and choose for euthanasia and even though we don't have a relationship wants to see me one more time before she dies..

    As you can read above, I was till my uncle called me, wtf?!! What a fucking year this is.

    Ugh, anyway off for the day as I need to attend my mother's death.. :(
     
  6. ziko12345

    ziko12345 Power Member

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    I am really sorry to hear that. I think you are doing the right thing. I hope you dont get demotivated and keep being sober. As strong as you are you will get through this too.
    I will pray for you!
     
  7. Billy Batts

    Billy Batts Jr. Executive VIP Jr. VIP

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    Came of the phone with my uncle, they are trying to get her in a hospital first but I know her, doubt she will go anytime soon.. Her doctor is religious and won't do it so she will not die today but depending how bad her condition is it probably not going to take very long.

    I will stay sober ;)
     
  8. ziko12345

    ziko12345 Power Member

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    Go see her!
    A mother is a mother no mater what.
     
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  9. AdultScriptPro

    AdultScriptPro Registered Member

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    Ohh...sorry to hear about this, i know its not easy, but you dont have to get involved emotionally...stay sober and do your own thing! I've been there...my father had cancer 2 times, both times the doctors told him...stop smoking and drinking, but yeah he's smarter than the doctors...he cant eat now...so he will probably die soon...can i do something about this? no i cant, i tried everything, talking, not giving money, listening, even stole his smokes/drinks...i could do what they taught me to do...like suffer, be agrresive, drink, punish myself...but i wont do that, i dont have to suffer for his choices....we all make choices in our lifes...
     
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  10. Billy Batts

    Billy Batts Jr. Executive VIP Jr. VIP

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    I will when the time is right, the situation is very complex of where a simple "a mother is a mother" does not apply but even though what she put me through and I have no feelings for her and she pointed out many times she didn't give a fuck if I slept outside or where ever, at the very end I will be there.

    I'm not too emotially involved. I've accepted that I will never have a caring mom and not have a dad a long time ago. Doesn't mean it's not bothering but I'm more bothered with the fact how life went down and I won't get that time back then that she will die plus it's just this fucking year with my grandmother and grandfather. Ugh. Anyway, I keep very busy with my project so I'm ok for now.

    About that script, we should talk about that in the future as I have some adult projects lined up.
     
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  11. ziko12345

    ziko12345 Power Member

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    I know, i have read a thread where you explained your life journey.
    I know you will.
    Best of luck.
     
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  12. itsyaboylofti

    itsyaboylofti Registered Member

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    Mate honestly thanks so much for sharing that with all of us. It's incredible you're trying to kick it.

    I was addicted to drugs about 2 years ago (painkillers) and the shit you go through to get off them is intense, so I can imagine alcohol being similar as they're both depressants.

    Horrible nightmares, don't know what's real or not etc.

    Best thing you can do is to remain focussed and, if you need it, go get some therapy.

    Stay strong + if you want anyone to chat to who has kicked it give us a PM.
     
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  13. AdultScriptPro

    AdultScriptPro Registered Member

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    I've lost days, nights, weeks...probably years lived in the past...how would i be now if my parents didnt abuse me, shame me, ridicule me and instead thaught me to love myself, do stuff for myself...and the conclussion i've come to is that it doesnt matter...my future can only be influenced by the present...what i do with my time right now! It doesnt guarantee anything, but its the best option.

    I dont sell anything here yet, but once i do, yes we can discuss about my scripts/projects.
     
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  14. lotonice

    lotonice Newbie

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    I wish you the best on your journey, I know how it feel being 7 days free of something that has constantly pulled you down.
    All the best mate, never quit on trying to quit!
     
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  15. Billy Batts

    Billy Batts Jr. Executive VIP Jr. VIP

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    Although I must admit when she denied me tons of times I said what is happening now which was, One day you will be sick and alone and then think about that you let me sleep outside and asking to see me. But yeah, when the moment is there I will be there, I don't want to, I don't like it but I would be stone cold if I would deny that.

    Ah yeah, 2 times this year I almost died drinking multiple bottles of whiskey and wodka while popping pain killers, I'm surprised I even woke up. The first weeks has been horrible, indeed nightmare IF I could sleep at all, sweating, heart palpitations, very aggressive, mad, with flings of depression but it's getting a little better now physically. I still dealing this year with the loss of my grandparents and now my mother seems to be also going this year.

    I just need to stay occupied.

    My past has hunted me a longggg as time. Still can't get rid of it entirely but I'm learning to say, fuck it, I can't change it anymore. My grandparents are gone, I will never have a dad or a good mom, it is what it is.

    Thanks and strength to you too.
     
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  16. Billy Batts

    Billy Batts Jr. Executive VIP Jr. VIP

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    WEEKLY UPDATE

    Days sober: 28
    Days worked out this week: 2
    Working on Projects: 1 (finishing up)

    With all that is going on this year I'm surprised I still haven't had a single drop of alcohol so far for the past 28 days. Didn't work out as much as I would've wanted as I was working my ass of finishing my eBook which is finally finished and ready to go and I just tried to stay as busy as possible as this week I got the shitty news my mother is too ill to continue life and decided to choose for euthanasia. For the few that don't know what that means, it's basically ending your life under medical supervision.

    As I'm still grieving quite hard about the loss of my grandparents earlier this year it was another smack in the face, can't this dude catch a break or something..Don't know where I got the power from to stay sober but yeah, 28 days which is pretty munch close to a month. Probably normal and not long for most but for an alcoholic it's quite long. Now I've been at this point before and relapsed later but since April I haven't been sober for more than a week max and those weeks can be counted on one hand.

    Anyway, really appreciate everybody that has brought positive vibes and I'm happy to read some of you found inspiration from some of my threads.

    [​IMG]
     
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    Last edited: Dec 14, 2019
  17. Guts

    Guts Regular Member

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    You will do well! Why?
    Because you are already trying to be better and starting and trying to become even one% better then who you were yesterday is where you know if you have already won or already lost.


    Ps - if by chance you relapse it is fine dont take it seriously, just make sure to never relapse the very next day or so, habit formation should be avoided at any cost.
     
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  18. FUTUR TIM

    FUTUR TIM Jr. VIP Jr. VIP

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    @Billy Batts, keep travelling when there's an opportunity for it. I do believe that it helps a lot in overcoming the addiction and it was a key to beat mine as well.

    Stay strong, you're over it.
     
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  19. Daggermouthx

    Daggermouthx Regular Member

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    Dude, you should get some meal prep delivery. Me and the lady both hate cooking, so we get healthy meals delivered to us.

    It really helps with sticking to a diet.

    Also, excited for this ebook.
     
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  20. Billy Batts

    Billy Batts Jr. Executive VIP Jr. VIP

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    On day 33 but man, fucking life is testing me AF. Wen to see my mother today who doesn't have long to live. Even though our past it was hurtful as hell to see her like that and when I got home shiit, it hurt more than I though, that on top of my grandparents, having a real hard time to focus..