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I'm NOT as think as you drunk I am.

Discussion in 'BlackHat Lounge' started by Abercrombie, Jun 19, 2009.

  1. Abercrombie

    Abercrombie BANNED BANNED

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    So my roomate is on the bathroom floor.
    We were drinking last night but I promised my other friend that I would go for a dune walk & I have to go to church today (this morning) and none of this is stuff that should be done hung over.
    So, somehow I managed to regulate myself, BUT NOT my friend. I woke up to some banging and clanking and sure enough; I walk out to the hall and see feet poling from the bathroom.
    There he is lying on the floor, with a fishing tank hose and a towel, hugging the toilet (but in no need of tossing up).
    I'm like (after a whole two minutes of watching this fool), "man, what are you doing", and he is like Ï'm changing the fucking wipe..........genius"
    I just walked away and went to grab a beer (take the edge off at 4am) and sure enough, the whole case was out by his computer along with another case and a fifth of vodka.
    Now he is on the bathroom floor sound asleep....
    FUCK man. Who knew alcohol made people nuts.....


    DRUNK STORY:

    So it was my 19th birthday and we had 4 kegs and a beach. I did (I don't know how many) keg stands, but they all had to be 19 seconds long or longer. Sure enough, on top of the mixed drink that I made for myself, I drank the beer from the kegs (it was a gift) and I did all the keg stands I could manage.

    Eventually it was time to go home and my friend was like "well what are we doing with the kegs?". (mind you we are only 19). Delos volunteers that we put them behind jis garage because his dad will not notice; and we should all stay there so as not to drink and drive.

    Sure, that makes sense, we load all these kegs and WAY more people in the Suberban than it was ever designed for; go to his house and just as we pull up, Delos is like "no pull forward of the house so my dad does not wake up""!

    I could only imagine what it looked like. 8 kids in the dark running down oak (just off of main street) with 4 kegs of beer.

    So we are done and my friends are like ""Let's go to 711"
    I am like "Fuck that, Shlappy (the dick head cop of the neighborhood) will see you and arrest you all"!
    "Pussy"they say
    I'm like "fuck you guys, I am not going to jail.
    "Sit here and babysit the kegs"they say

    So I take them up on it. Sit down on the keg, stick the hose in my mouth and start pumping the keg. I am sure that they will be only gone for the 2 minutes that it takes to walk to 711 and get slurpees, so I promise myself to continuously drink until then.

    They are gone FOREVER, but I will not give up my task, so I remember them pushing me up the stairs, then the next thing I remember, is Delos's dad punching me in the arm. He was like"JASON, HEY""
    "What"I ask, coming to consciousness
    ""What the fuck are you doing"he asks
    So I realize that a question has been answered and I realize that my dick is in my fingers and so I look down and sure enough; I am standing in the kitchen pissing in the pot this huge fake plant. ''Oh'', I manage to utter
    'Get to the fucking bathroom"" he says, so I do and that was that.

    His dad somehow knew that we were drinking that night.

    Share drunk stories here!!!!!!
     
    Last edited: Jun 19, 2009
  2. TermsB

    TermsB Senior Member

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    But first deliver me the beer.
     
  3. TermsB

    TermsB Senior Member

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    Pro double post from server lag. :(
     
    Last edited: Jun 19, 2009
  4. Abercrombie

    Abercrombie BANNED BANNED

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    That's what I am saying. The fool drank all but 3 of them.... crazy.....
     
  5. cubecul

    cubecul Newbie

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    Why would you drink continuously knowing that eventually you'll pass out and not remember what subsequently happens?
     
  6. Abercrombie

    Abercrombie BANNED BANNED

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    Ask him dude. I am not sure....
     
  7. blackhat50

    blackhat50 Regular Member

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    maybe hes bi-sexual, leave the poor kid alone :eek:

    :detective
     
    Last edited: Jun 19, 2009
  8. Abercrombie

    Abercrombie BANNED BANNED

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    thanks for killing the thread blackhat. way to fucking go. bring up religion, politics or sexuality and a thread dies. you should know better dumb shit.

    and no he is not bi. what the hell does that have to do with him being passed out on linoleum?
     
  9. Moneymaka

    Moneymaka Junior Member

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    Haha that's a nice story.
    Well written