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I could really use some help dealing with a gossiper.

Discussion in 'BlackHat Lounge' started by Erik, Apr 12, 2009.

  1. Erik

    Erik Regular Member

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    So here's this situation:

    My best friend is married to my wife's best friend. The problem is his wife...

    Her M.O. is that she will take hearsay, twist it around, then spout it off to other people behind your back as truth. If you ever call her out on this, she comes with a holier than thou attitude, and acts as if the gossip was justified.

    Recently I decided to just cut ties with her which isn't a hard thing for me. But then, my best friend stops calling me, and she stops calling my wife. It is completely screwed up.

    Now for a bit of history, a few years back I got into RE investing, and this same person started with the shit. "He'll lose all your money" she would tell my wife. "I hear what he is doing is illegal and he'll get caught and go to jail" "I am embarrassed for him."

    Yeah, and when I did my second closing for an 87,000 profit, she pretended like she was for me all along.

    So fast forward back to now, I am starting to do pretty good for myself (based on my own need, not like Harro's 25K or more a day) Anyhow, I have not talked to her at all about what I'm doing and only made passing comments when asked about by other people because it of the fact that every little thing will get back to her, twisted, then replied back to other people without anyone actually talking to me directly.

    If anyone has seen the movie Doubt, she reminds me of Meryl Streep's Character.

    But it happened, she's got everyone I know acting like I'm a criminal. My best friend pretty much doesn't talk to me but he'll deny anythings up if I ask. And my Wife is passive aggressively pissed at me because her friend is throwing her out to dry because of this girls feelings for me.

    I'm thy type of guy who usually just wants everyone to get along so it's a pretty shitty situation.

    What do you think I should do?
     
  2. genie1

    genie1 Junior Member

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    I would just look past it and continue what you're doing. There's always going to be people who will not agree with your ideas/actions. Its not your job to convince them otherwise, that's a losing battle because in their mind they believe what they're preaching. 99% of the time, they're just envious anyway, and they always will be no matter how much money or generosity you throw their way because they know deep down they can't do it for themselves.
    If you just press on like you are, and continue to be successful with it, your wife will side with you eventually like any best friend would do.

    Personally, I never explain myself to anyone. I do what I say I am going to do, with or without criticism, and I don't ever try and justify myself.
     
  3. Sanitarium

    Sanitarium Regular Member

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    I guess making love to your eyes since you're read
    Location:
    In your mind.
    Have you ever asked her where she 'hears what you do is illegal'?
    If she can tell you then maybe you can find the real source of the misery.
    Now, if the source just happens to be a voice that was born in her own little head, just ignore people like that and pretend you don't have a problem with her, it's not that hard, but if she's calling you out in public (and you are present) you are allowed to shut her up.

    Do you have her email? I think i'd run a visine offer on her,
    seems like a case of red-eye, you know, bloodshot eyes caused by envy.
     
  4. Erik

    Erik Regular Member

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    She mixes up her moral with legal. Thinking if something is immoral to her it must be illegal.