Why do we stand in circles? Because we don't do lines anymore. Which spiritual principle is that? The only difference between God and me is that God doesn't think He's me... Remember its not "How high are you?", Its "Hi, how are you?" Warning! I have character defects and I'm not afraid to use them. Dopeless Hopefiend Life's a BITCH, then you change your attitude. Take my advice, I'm not using it. Procrastinators anonymous.... We meet later... You can't save your face and your ass at the same time. Tweekers Suck I'm here to kick ass and sign your paper. My mother was a travel agent for guilt trips. Expectations are premeditated resentments. I don't want to fuck you, I'm here to stay sober. Take an asshole off drugs and you still have an asshole. Everything after "but" is bullshit. Sobriety delivers everything alcohol promised. I'm allergic to alcohol, I break out in handcuffs... LMAO!!!! Recovery is not sexually transmitted. Been there, done that, can't remember most of it. S.H.I.T. Simply how I think If I could drink like a normal drinker, I'd drink all the time... Don't worry, your not on my eighth step. Kiss me, I'm sober! Rehab is for quitters. A positive attitude may not solve all my problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth my effort... Got Recovery, Need Booty. The mind is like a parachute, it works better when it's open... IF you all have any other little funny blurbs, just give them a post..