Gambling ruined my life, journey from hopeless to enjoying life again.

4ry4n said:

Hey man,

I myself am struggling with losing my day job some days ago, my situation is not as bad as yours as I have no debts but again we share some resemblance.
Best of luck, write down your plans, non-written plans are just "wishes".

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scanningthru said:

All you can do is pick up where you are and move on.

Continue to warn others as a way to show them love in that you would never want what happened to you, happen to them.

Family/friends can be understanding of this, but it will still be a bag that you need to carry for a bit.

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universalas said:

I dont even know where to start from. I'm a member of this forum for 10+ years but I barely posted anything but always been active in terms of reading.
I am from a country where the average salary is like 700-800dollars, got masters degrees and always was interested in making money online. Had a little success in different niches but nothing crazy.

I started gambling 4-5 years ago, things escalated quickly and fast forward today I have 41,519 dollars in debt (personal loans), all lost in gambling. Money that If I stay in my job I would not be able to pay in +10 years. Nobody knows, i mean not even my parents, girlfriend or best friends. I feel ashamed and kept it to myself for the last few years. Had suicide thoughts and wanted to take my own life. I quit gambling and have not played for few months.

Making this journey as i currently try to pick myself up and payments are half my salary and barely can afford life. Still dont know how to explain to my girlfriend why I dont have any money left, every month. Cant sleep at night as I constantly think how to get out of this situation. Found a second job on weekends.

I create this thread as I want to keep my self accountable and document that there's still hope at the end of the road

started instagram theme page and might give youtube a try as I dont have any other ideas at the moment.
My apologies for this long thread, apparently this forum is the only place where I can get some things off my chest.

DO NOT EVER, EVER GAMBLE ON SLOTS.

Thanks.

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MrDenz said:

Hey @universalas

I want you to know that by writing and posting this thread you have already proven that you can do much better in life!

I'm not writing this to you to make you feel good because you feel bad, no... I'm writing you the truth.

This is your first step, and although it seems like nothing, trust me, that first step is also the hardest, getting out of your "private nest" is a very fu**ed up thing when a person gets deep into some life games.

One thing I must say, if you are planning to marry that girl, if you are planning for the future, one thing without which nothing will ever work is "trust".

My advice to you is to come clean in front of her and get it out of yourself because that's how you can start your new life. (I did the same a long time ago with my wife today, like 15+ years ago)

If she is the "right person" for you, if you are meant to be together, she will say, ok, thanks for the truth, now let's see how we get on?

You know, in life, everyone thinks that our problems are the worst, the most difficult, that there is no one who has bigger problems at a certain moment, but there is always, ALWAYS worse than the worst, remember that!

You have everything you need to do something more in your life, take advantage of this opportunity!​

I know you can, it will be difficult, it won't be easy, but what is easy in life?

I will follow your journey and I hope you will update it at least every 2, to 3 weeks, always ask what you are interested in, I wish you all the best!

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xelaa said:

If $800 is the normal pay per month in your country could you evaluate your skills and apply for a foreign company to work for remotely where you could possibly double that salary? Increase your skills in life if not then offer it on upwork people from all over the world can make $20+ per hour.

Really rooting for you OP never give up okay...

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borntoglow said:

Unfortunately I know this story all too well…just that I was one of the “loved ones” who had no idea about how serious the situation was.

Admitting that you have a weakness means you’re already on the good path. However, it is hard and a bit unfair to hide your struggles from your loved ones.

Living in guilt is not a good choice, you will feel better after taking the weight off your shoulders. Chances are your family already knows that you’re struggling with something, especially your girlfriend (depending on how serious your relationship is).

It will take some time to recover financially but you will. It’s a life lesson and you can use it to help others who are struggling with the same addiction. Keep your head up and remember that we all make mistakes!

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deppo said:

If it makes you feel better OP I had lost $200k+ in poker over a few years playing emotionally as opposed to strategically. The only way to really quit gambling is to change your identity at a deep level and how you see yourself as. Because even if you just stop playing for a while, in an emotional downturn or if you split with your gf or a family member dies or whatever you may find yourself back to gambling as a means of comfort.

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Salamouna said:

That's why I never accept to work with a client in that niche
people only care to make money and they don't care about making other lose money or even destroy their life
good luck

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MagicAccount said:

OP, I hope you will never fall into gambling trap again in the future and you will be able to pay off your debts.
I wish you all the best.

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Pelicani Nema said:

Good luck on your journey

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Carolus Rex said:

Sorry to hear your situation, gambling is a hell of an addiction and relapses can and often do happen. My advice is to get yourself banned on all the casinos. Check if there's any service in your country that can do this, or send an email to all the casinos and ask them to ban you for life. Also, talk to your partner. Good luck, you'll need it.

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INCC said:

The first thing is to make sure you won't fall back into that trap.

$40k might seem like a lot of money but in IM terms, it really isn't that much.

Some freelancers on BHW make $3000 per month - That would already solve most of your issues within a year. Next year already $40k in profits.

Gotta learn a skill or something that you can sell here, baby steps, you'll make it.

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