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For us who take Feedback personally

Discussion in 'BlackHat Lounge' started by funkybunker, Dec 29, 2013.

  1. funkybunker

    funkybunker Supreme Member

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    I think this gives a great explanation on giving & receiving criticism (feedback).

    Read the article here

    It explores something I believe we all notice here at BHW; our privilege to build fellow members into stronger people turns into sarcastic phrases that aren't helpful at all.
    I myself have done this before, and it's no way to command respect.
    To receive constructive feedback we must acknowledge it as "only toward our craft". Someone directly bashing you as a person is NOT giving feedback. That's called being a jackass. For example you'll absorb "You're optimizing your content a little too well, may I advise less keyword-stuffing and focus on them as anchors for backlinks later" as improving your writing skills, not that you should die in a ditch.
    Lending advice could be "I suggest cutting back on web 2.0 creation and focus more on Social Signals" instead of "Hey stupid shit, do you fail at life for a living" followed by
    20 Thanks.

    Next time we give/receive advice, be sure to target our performances and not ourselves as people. There's a blurry line between Judging and Assisting.
    Let's throw away our mallets.

    -Funky
     
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  2. MadStacks

    MadStacks BANNED BANNED

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    Hey stupid shit, do you fail at life for a living?
     
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  3. tnhomestead

    tnhomestead Regular Member

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    One other big problem is that we type our responses -- something that comes across as sarcasm or an insult when typed, could very easily have been a joke if they were face to face with you.

    But its always better to build up others instead of cutting them down!
     
  4. funkybunker

    funkybunker Supreme Member

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    That's the flaw of text communication. We can't convey our personalities through words when "the way we say it" can only be imagined by the reader.
    I might say you fucking asshole with a smiling laugh, but you will assume I said it with a straight face or shouted it.