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Ex-Girlfriend took off with my Kid...

Discussion in 'BlackHat Lounge' started by Mckinise, Mar 29, 2010.

  1. Mckinise

    Mckinise Junior Member

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    About 2 days ago my (then) girlfriend took off in the middle of the night with our child. I was out of town, and came home to an empty house. I ended up finding out that she had quit her job, had the utilities turned off, and told the landlord she was moving. She took our tax refund and ran.

    I did some research and found that she was moving out of state, and met up with some guy on the way.

    The facts:

    We have joint custody.

    The Custody agreement states She can not legally take our child and leave without my permission.

    I was never notified officially or unofficially.


    What I have:

    The regional IP address of Her last email. It was sent from a large city in which she has relatives.

    Her social security number.

    Most likely she is staying with the relative.

    Her last phone number before she changed it last night.

    Any one have any ideas how I can find her, and get my child back?
     
  2. bizcredit

    bizcredit Power Member

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    Call the police first, post on BHW second. Hire a private investigator if the police cannot find anything in a few days.
     
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  3. gonzomcribbinz

    gonzomcribbinz Regular Member

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    Dude, this may be considered kidnapping, depending on the circumstances. (I'm no lawyer, though)

    Contact the authorities ASAP. You can probably bring up charges against her for theft and maybe even reckless endangerment of a minor, depending on the details.

    At any rate, contact the police. Don't waste your time here.
     
  4. TheTRUTH

    TheTRUTH Regular Member

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    Whitepages.com if you know last names
     
  5. Grandslam

    Grandslam Senior Member

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    Contact social services. If you have joint custody, that's a big no-no on her part.

    Call the news in the big city she's staying in while you're at it. Tell them what happened. They'll probably be willing to help and it makes a great story for them.
     
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  6. Millygirl

    Millygirl Regular Member

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    Sometimes I wonder if BHW have hidden lawyers and doctors on board, lol.

    Do not try to find her and get the child back yourself. Do it the legal way. Call the police and tell them the issue. They may end up putting out an Amber Alert. Make sure you keep records of everything (police report, record that she told the landlord she was moving out, etc. everything, even the smallest details is important here) in case you end up in custody court again.

    I hate to say it but if you fear there is a remote chance that your child might be in danger make sure to express this to the police. You're probably emotional now, remember to keep your cool and don't do anything stupid. If you do get in contact with your ex do not threaten to kill her or do any bodily harm to anyone. Off you go.

    *Disclaimer: I'm not a lawyer
    .
     
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  7. tygrus

    tygrus Supreme Member

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    Find some way to bait her into sending you some more emails, then get a judge to give a court order to your internet service provider to release the exact details of where that IP address is (i.e. street address + phone number).

    Show up, kick in door, steal back kid, move out of country.
     
  8. zebrahat

    zebrahat Elite Member

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    What to watch out for is girlfriend claiming to have run for safety reasons (saying you abused her or the child). Presuming you are innocent, she might still talk the kid (if old enough to talk) into confirming her story, then CPS/court may keep you away from them anyhow. It's sad how many women dislike a joint custody arrangement, despite it usually being the best one for the children, and pull stunts to get 100% control anyway.
     
  9. Mckinise

    Mckinise Junior Member

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    Just talked to someone. This is considered parental kidnapping. I have to go in first thing in the morning to have a motion for contempt filed, and a few other things. I should be award temporary sole custody, until it can go to court.
     
  10. delmages

    delmages Jr. VIP Jr. VIP Premium Member

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    You need to contact the 'Friend of the Court' or whatever the entity that facilitates child custody arrangements is called in your state. Inform them of your situation and explain that you believe your ex-girlfriend has most likely left the state with your child.

    Call the police. They will not help you unless you can reasonably PROVE that she has left the state and you have documentation stating that this is against your custody arrangement.

    Document ANY action you have taken since the child's abduction has transpired. Note dates and times as well as the agency and whom you spoke with. This will prove useful should you need to petition the court for full custody of the child.

    You need to call the aforementioned agencies NOW. The longer you wait, the farther away your ex could be with your child.

    I have a child with my ex-husband and share 50/50 as well. I know what you are going through as he used to play dirty, under-handed games also. Don't be tempted to play along and do something rash. Get the authorities involved and have the situation handled according to the law. I wish you the best of luck!
     
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  11. Mckinise

    Mckinise Junior Member

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    I am worried about the lie factor as well. I caught her with a guy in the past. He threated to kill me. When I called the police she said that she was going to say that I physically assaulted her.

    I ended up saying they were pranking me, and letting it go. I was shocked she would threaten to lie to protect some dude she was boning.
     
  12. gonzomcribbinz

    gonzomcribbinz Regular Member

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    This chick is baaaad news. Sorry, OP. Get your kid back (legally, of course) and after you do, petition for full custody if possible with supervised visitation.

    You don't want your kid growing up thinking your wingnut ex-gf is the way to lead a normal life.

    Good luck.
     
  13. Spawn

    Spawn Jr. VIP Jr. VIP

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    shit like this sickens me!
     
  14. dishnetboi

    dishnetboi Power Member

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    You have to talk to the authorities as soon as possible. Or else that will raise questions about whether or not her kidnapping was in any way justified.
     
  15. 4brdng2a

    4brdng2a Newbie

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    With all the mistakes she's been making she'll probably come crawling back to harass you for child support money very soon unless the guy she ran away with is loaded with money but I doubt he is for going along with this situation. He probably has issues too. Good luck, man. Stay safe. Sounds like a person who wouldn't have a problem with hurting you.
     
  16. GreenGoblin

    GreenGoblin BANNED BANNED

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    I been through this before, this is what u do...go to the court house file the paper working stating the mother is interfering with your parental rights, because she hasn't brought your child back to the state, after the judge signs off on the paper work and he or she will. Find out where she is ...then contact the local police and fax over the signed documentation from the court house stating the mother needs to bring the child back...the authorities will tell her she has a certain amount of time to get the child back into the state with you, or they will take custody of the child and bring the child back. Trust me on this I seen this before..went through the same issue back in like 2007
     
  17. GreenGoblin

    GreenGoblin BANNED BANNED

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    ^^^ this is actually good advice, i see someone else been through it also..pretty much what i was saying.
     
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  18. ericsson

    ericsson Elite Member Premium Member

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    Hi!

    I have also been in this situation, yes believe it or not.
    I came home from my last day at work. The clock was 11 P.M ..

    Empty house, everything was pure dark, and she haven´t called me, nothing.
    She took our son with her. And the engagement ring was found on the table with a note..

    I was crying to death man. :/

    In Sweden the laws says, that she CAN´T take him from you, without you knowing anything about it.

    So either call the police and ask them how you can move forward this, and try also to contact the social office, i think they will help you.

    If you take her to court, she already have an negative rep on her, because she doing this.

    Hope you will find your son, and hope you feel alright man.
    Wish the best of luck to you.

    //J
     
  19. BigHustlah

    BigHustlah Power Member

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    I would #1 call the cops, expect them to do jack sh!t, then #2 hire a PI, one who is willing to give you RESULTS.

    This sort of thing is my worst nightmare. No fun messing around with ppl trying to take your kids. I feel really bad for ya man.

    STOP AT NOTHING TO GET THEM BACK.
     
  20. aishahriar

    aishahriar BANNED BANNED

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    URGENT -

    Notify police, social services IMMEDIATELY

    I had to study a bit of law. Delay indicates some level of acceptance - screwed, but law sucks.

    Notify the authorities ASAP.

    Don't Delay.

    Post back once everything's ok