1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

About Email Scams

Discussion in 'BlackHat Lounge' started by randy69, Apr 10, 2011.

  1. randy69

    randy69 Registered Member

    Dec 2, 2007
    Likes Received:
    Melbourne, Australia
    I was unable to send you a bulletin this April Fools Day from Oz. One year it was "decimal time", and I caught some of you out. This is not original, but you may get a laugh out of it

    All comments appreciated.

    My thanks to all those who have sent me emails this past year ...
    I must send my thanks to whoever sent me the one about the rat droppings
    in the glue on envelopes because I now have to use a wet towel with
    every envelope that needs sealing.

    * I now have to scrub the top of every can I open for the same
    * I no longer have any savings because I gave it to a sick girl
    (Penny Brown); who is about to die in the hospital for the 1,387,258th time.
    * I no longer have any money at all, but that will change once I receive
    the $15,000 that Bill Gates/Microsoft and AOL are sending me for participating in their special e-mail program ...
    * Or from the senior bank clerk in Nigeria who wants me to split $ 7million
    with me for pretending to be a long lost relative of a customer who
    died intestate.
    * I no longer worry about my soul because I have 363,214 angels looking out
    for me, and St.Theresa's novena has granted my every wish.
    * I no longer use cancer-causing deodorants even though I smell like a
    water buffalo on a hot day.
    * Thanks to you, I have learned that my prayers only get answered if I
    forward e-mail to seven of my friends and make a wish within five minutes.
    * Because of your concern I no longer drink Coca-Cola because it can remove
    toilet stains.
    * I no longer can buy petrol without taking a man along to watch the car so
    a serial killer won't crawl in my back seat when I'm filling up.
    * I no longer go to shopping malls because someone will drug me with a
    perfume sample and rob me.
    * I no longer answer the phone because someone will ask me to dial a number
    for which I will get a phone bill with calls to Jamaica, Uganda, Singapore
    and Uzbekistan.
    * Thanks to you, I can't use anyone's toilet but mine because a big brown
    African spider is lurking under the seat to cause me instant death when it
    bites my bum.
    * And thanks to your great advice, I can't even pick up the $5.00 I found
    dropped in the car park because it probably was placed there by a sex
    molester waiting underneath my car to grab my leg.
    * I don't go to the movies anymore because of the hypodermic needles in the
    seats placed there by random strangers wanting to drug me.
    * I am going to court next week because I was charged with failing to stop
    then resisting arrest when a policeman pulled me over because I was certain
    he was a rapist impersonating a cop.
    * If you don't send this e-mail to at least 144,000 people in the next 70
    minutes, a large dove with diarrhea will land on your head at 5:00pm this
    afternoon and the fleas from 12 camels will infest your back, causing you to
    grow a hairy hump.
    * I know this will occur because it actually happened to a friend of my
    next door neighbour's ex-mother-in-law's second husband's cousin's

    By the way, a South American scientist after a lengthy study has
    discovered that people with low IQ and who have infrequent sexual
    activity always read their e-mails with their hand on the mouse. Don't
    bother taking it off now, it's too late.

    For your own sanity please pass this on to all those parsimonious & gullible
    folk who continue to send you those ridiculous & extreme right-wing
    pseudo charismatic pentecostal semi-religious 'chain-letter' emails with the
    implored plea to continue the exercise. Maybe this email may stop them
    immediately and then we can wait for the wrath of an unseen figure from
    some-where' who will rain upon us all those 7 deadly sins you once were told
    about and maybe read in those pamphlets from those 'white-shirted
    Aussies' over here to 'save the populace'!!!!!!!!!

    Hmmm makes us wonder who actually works or spends time writing
    this crap.lol.....