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A bouncer at this club I frequent GRABS and TOUCHES me like I'm a little boy

Discussion in 'BlackHat Lounge' started by I wear slippers, Nov 21, 2015.

  1. I wear slippers

    I wear slippers Junior Member

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    Of course all the alpha males jump in and say 'yo dude no1 would EVER try that shit with me you must be asking for it!' Watching him he does this to loads of people but to me it just happens to piss me off. I imagine it makes other people uncomfortable too.

    He seems like a nice enough guy, ie not a total low self esteem guy who does it in a spiteful way. But it's more that he assumes too much familiarity.

    I go to this club several times a week so it is really an issue that has to be corrected.

    For example the other day I was standing in the queue and he had crept up behind me and JABS ME HARD SEVERAL TIMES IN THE RIBS causing me to yelp loudly like a girl since I wasn't expecting any such nonesense. If you've ever been jabbed in the ribs you know how horrible the feeling is; that sharp tickling sensation.

    Last night, since I shaved my hair to number 0, he walked up to me then SLAPS MY HEAD HARD AND SQUEEZES MY HEAD. This time I retaliated a little by grabbing his arms to brace both of them and I said 'what are you doing?' or something of that nature. But I doubt he got the message.

    I am a grown man of over 30 years old yet he is grabbing me around like I'm his 5 year old nephew on his knee. I don't even know the guy it's just as soon as he recognized me from going to the club regular he starts with this shit like we are lifelong friends. Really inappropriate. Again let me state I see him doing this to loads of other guy's too; girls too come to think of it. Not that it makes it any better but just saying I'm not the only one.

    Not sure how to handle this now? because he is always there and it's the main club I go to. I think I have to somehow say something which makes it seem like he's the insecure one rather than trying to say it seriously. Maybe accuse him of being gay since I guess bouncers are very insecure about that with wanting to look macho and all.
     
  2. DTjai

    DTjai Regular Member

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    Heya I wear slippers,

    In my opinion the best way to handle this would be to isolate the bouncer for a 1 on 1 conversation.
    Then tell him that you think he is a nice guy but that the way he interacts with you makes you feel uncomfortable.
    If he is really that nice of a guy as you assume he is he will at least try to do it less or not at all.
    In no way should you ever try to confront this in a way that seems like you are trying to attack him on his insecurity or macho style.

    Regards,

    DTJai
     
  3. Cryogenesis

    Cryogenesis Jr. VIP Jr. VIP

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    Still tryna wrap my head around this. Let him do this thing lolol.
     
  4. BreaknBrix

    BreaknBrix Power Member

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    Grab his hand, forcibly hold it on your ass then repeatedly tell him how much you like his hand on your butt.

    It's always worked for me.
     
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  5. DTjai

    DTjai Regular Member

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    What if he is into guys? Surely he will take you back to the alley or his place.
     
  6. asap1

    asap1 BANNED BANNED

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    Buy him a drink.
     
  7. UptonGoodwin

    UptonGoodwin Power Member

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    Beat him up is your only option.
     
  8. Asif WILSON Khan

    Asif WILSON Khan Executive VIP Jr. VIP

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    Your Club isn't The Blue Oyster Bar, is it?

     
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    Last edited by a moderator: May 18, 2016
  9. Ste Fishkin

    Ste Fishkin BANNED BANNED Jr. VIP

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    I was drunk once and pissed on my hands and grabbed my bald friends head...

    But in your case, maybe he just wants you dude.
     
  10. Ste Fishkin

    Ste Fishkin BANNED BANNED Jr. VIP

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    I went to a gay bar in Austria once, it took me an hour to notice.

    Everyone was so friendly, I thought they were interested in me and my friends because they rarely see English people?

    Nope.

    When it clicked I stood up shocked and drunk, and said "oh fuck this is a gay bar isn't it?". That was the gayest thing I've ever done.
     
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  11. Jesse Custer

    Jesse Custer Regular Member

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    Me love ya long time :)

    Sgt_db7309_1697408.jpg
     
  12. Asif WILSON Khan

    Asif WILSON Khan Executive VIP Jr. VIP

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    There have been plenty of times that I have had to resort to the Gay Bars on Old Compton Street to get another drink, when I have been kicked out of a Club or Bar in Soho.
     
  13. Jesse Custer

    Jesse Custer Regular Member

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    Nice to see fellow Brits in the forum :)

    Say what you want, gay people know how to party!
     
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  14. davids355

    davids355 Jr. VIP Jr. VIP

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    Maybe you should stop turning up at the club in slippers?
     
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  15. t0mmy

    t0mmy Jr. Executive VIP Jr. VIP

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    I bet OP is one of those guys that when he's drunk he chats hours of absolute shite to the bouncers, high fiving them, offering them round for Sunday dinner the next day no doubt. We all have a friend like you.

    This time it's backfired.. this bouncer really wants to be your actual for real friend.

    Life's too short.. Embrace the bromance man...
     
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  16. Asif WILSON Khan

    Asif WILSON Khan Executive VIP Jr. VIP

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    I love those guys, sit talking to the bouncers all night, buy them drinks, then they start to think they are actually a bouncer and start acting the big man ... until they get punched in the face by some 13 year old lol
     
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  17. Jesse Custer

    Jesse Custer Regular Member

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    Oooh, Matron. You need a safe-word! :spankme:
     
  18. ChanzGrande

    ChanzGrande Elite Member

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    There is nothing wrong with some healthy bromantic interaction, but if it turns gay I'd stop going to that bar - unless you are gay - which is OK of course!

    But seriously ... talking is always the best next step in a situation like this. It actually doesn't matter much how the exchange goes. Most people who are made aware that their behavior is making someone uncomfortable adjust course accordingly. He probably just thinks you guys are friends.
     
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  19. Alpha.

    Alpha. Power Member

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    That was my first thought too ;)
     
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  20. Aluminium

    Aluminium Jr. VIP Jr. VIP Premium Member

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    Bust his ass, man!

    Just bring an aluminum bat to the club - make sure you've got an escape route ready!