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It depends on many factors, including how much time you can devote to it, your previous experience and, most importantly, your goals. If you want a wide free selection of thing to start with and get an idea, CodeCademy is the place to go.

I would recommend PHP because the most widely used open source Forum CMS phpBB is built on PHP.

You can use Import.io a free web scraper for non-programmers.I have used it before to scrape some forums.You can check this tutorial on how to use it.

Go to a local college book store and purchase a used somewhat recent copy of intro to (language). Codeacademy.com is free and kinda cool as well. I really suggest you learn something lesson based and structured. Reason being, you will start off with basics then get into more advanced programming...