"What Do You Do?" - What Do You Say To That?

[Smitty]

Hah, I was asked that question today.

"What do you do for a living?"

I started to explain what I did and I think I lost her
at "website traffic."

No it wasn't some hot chick, it was the oral hygienist.

If it was a good looking girl I would've told her I was
a contract killer or a sex instructor.


Anyways...

Lets hear em...

What do you say when someone asks what you do?

 

[hotstox]

Manage streams of internet traffic/visitors and send them to the most
profitable advertising source.. pretty much. Back in my adult days I learned
how to spin what I do - at banks and the likes.

 

[Belexandor]

Honestly Smitty, at this point in my young Blackhat career I just go ahead and tell the truth.

I'm a laptop technician.

 

[hotstox]

lmfao belex - problem with being vague is everyone wants to know more , they think they can do it to. I had a guy I bought a car from at carmax, who saw some payout stubs hound me for weeks, not to buy another car, but to teach him how to make money online lol

 

[TheInternetHustler]

I just say internet marketer

 

[Smitty]

Lol...

I mean usually the people that ask me what I do are people
I meet when I'm out. So I don't really care what I tell them.

Hell I've told people I was a professional snowboarder from
British Columbia.

But this women was really curious...

Haha, first time I had to tell the truth. I just didn't know how
to explain it.

Most people have no idea what website traffic even is!

 

[Smitty]

I just say internet marketer

Well that is what I said...

Then she said, "What does that mean."

I kind of went "Arggg" in my head then proceeded
to confuse the shit out of her.

 

[Belexandor]

One of my favorite replies is this:

"Me? Oh.... ummmm.... I'm the founder of a non-profit group dedicated to helping attractive young women pay their way through college."

 

[Smitty]

One of my favorite replies is this:

"Me? Oh.... ummmm.... I'm the founder of a non-profit group dedicated to helping attractive young women pay their way through college."

Haha, nice.

 

[Whisker]

haha, this is an interesting question that i'm asked a lot. Everytime just ends up me explaining that I do things that they could never do or even begin to understand.

Of course this confuses them even further causing more intrigue, which was my goal in the first place.

 

[hotstox]

One of my favorite replies is this:

"Me? Oh.... ummmm.... I'm the founder of a non-profit group dedicated to helping attractive young women pay their way through college."

OHH shit I have to use this one. Our grants will be paid out in ones and fives only. The biggest problem with questions like this is if you even answer it halfway legit they will bug you for info on getting them started. It's a curse either way, so may as well have some fun with it.

 

[Uptownbulker]

Yeah, I have the same problem and have found that "Internet Marketer", "Internet Adminsitrator" or "Internet Security Consultant" pretty much does the trick.

They are afraid to ask further because they will have to show that they have no idea what you are talking about and if they ask about "Internet Security Consultant", you can just tell them that you have a non-disclosure agreement which prohibits you from discussing the job.

 

[Whisker]

They are afraid to ask further because they will have to show that they have no idea what you are talking about and if they ask about "Internet Security Consultant", you can just tell them that you have a non-disclosure agreement which prohibits you from discussing the job.

Hah, that's a good one, but how does it get you laid?

 

[caretaker2007]

What woman doesn't like a man of mystery and intrigue? Like the 007 of the net or something, and Jim never seemed to have a problem.

 

[ximscreamingx]

venture capitalist...

 

[biginch]

I usually tell them I am someone who can count their yearly income in a month. And most want more explaination, so I just tell them figure it out.

Most people work for the weekly paycheck, I work for the yearly paycheck to be paid out each month.

wish that was the truth. One day.

Honestly I just say internet marketing, also I am a wine buyer so that helps too.

 

[newsman]

A Oral Hygienist Smitty??
Haven't you heard of Colgates and a tooth brush?

I just tell 'em I'm retired... it's easier.

 

[CyberDilemma]

I once got laid telling a chick I was on the Olympic synchronized swimming team....she was pretty dumb and I was pretty drunk at the time.

 

[hotstox]

^^ that's funny, I mean I guess I could understand if you said something else, but synchronized swimming kinda puts the icing on the cake haha.

 

[Uptownbulker]

Hah, that's a good one, but how does it get you laid?

Yes, especially now that I have to wear my eye patch so much more often!

I look like the guy in the old Hathaway Shirt ads!

Sort of lends an air of mystery, if you will.